Ok so I've posted a couple of threads on this subject now but his particular part is driving me crazy.
Myself and DH have separated but I say this in the loosest possible terms. He has been staying away part of the week and coming back to the house a couple of nights a week to see the kids.
We are friendly, amicable, fine with each other. DHs choice to separate. He says he doesn't love me anymore. Assured me no one else involved blah blah blah...
However, he has become super protective of his phone, never leaves his side, sleeps with it under his pillow, will not hand it over for any reason. Again assured me that there is nothing untoward but still won't leave it anywhere. He is messaging people all the time. I know some of it is work colleagues and a group chat with his friends about football, but he is literally on it all the time.
I am still managing family finances until he has his own place as I am a SAHM and he provides the house income so all of our bills come out the same account for the moment.
His phone bill came in a few days ago at over £100 more than what it usually is. He insists it's through calls talking to family and friends over our situation. But I worked it out, he would have had to be on the phone for over 50 hours above his minutes (300) to have a phone bill like this. I said I would write him a complaint letter (this is a normal thing for me to do). But he refused to give me a copy of his bill and said he would do it himself. I told him the calculations re the hours he would have had to spend on the phone to get a bill that high but he just blew it off. He says he will deal with it himself with the phone company. He is a terrible liar and what he is saying is utter bollocks.
I am an avid photo taker and the kids ran my battery out last night. There was a tremendous thunder and lightning storm, which I asked if I could video on his phone as mine had no battery. He insisted on coming with me and videoing it. I had no ulterior motive, and his camera skills are shit so he some how missed the whole thing.
Anyway... you get the idea.
I suppose I have several AIBUs to be answered.
AIBU to feel like I can't trust what he is telling me and think about how that might transfer to other subjects around our separation
AIBU to feel annoyed that he won't show me or tell me what's on his phone, after all we are separating and even if we weren't... his phone his business?
AIBU to expect to find out if there is an OW or... OM... (I'm not discounting anything)
He has given me no real explanation for this break up, (entirely his decision) no information, he has been very quiet. So you can imagine my imagination is running wild with all sorts of reasons/situations. I am a bit of a control freak so generally things like this are difficult for me. I have no knowledge or control.
I want to challenge him about his phone behaviour it's obsessive and if we were still together I would be talking to him about withdrawal/counselling because he really can't put it down. As we are separating, that will be up to him. I am convinced his relationship with his children will suffer over his phone usage.
I am annoyed at the phone bill as our finances are still very much joint and we don't have a lot of spare cash, £100 less in a month is pretty devastating.
Sorry for the very long post!!