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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be livid with ex dp

12 replies

downbutnotout2018 · 03/07/2018 14:41

Basically, I am away at a conference for 2 nights. As dp has temporary supply work, I asked him if he could take 2 days off to do childcare (has was complaining he had not seen enough of them recently). He said no, he needed the money and they needed him in work. My parents are elderly and have been helping out a lot recently. They said they were happy to look after them at their house (they needed time at home). Dp threw his dummy out of the pram on the phone to them (saying we hadn't 'discussed' arrangements), so bullied them into coming to our house to look after the kids (my dad had only just done a week's stint the week before). I have just called home and discovered exdp has NOT gone into work, because, quote 'its a sunny day', 'he didn't know in advance he wouldn't be going in' and 'that's the beauty of supply work'.He's gone off out somewhere with the kids, even though my parents drove 80 miles especially. He wont give them any thanks or money. Am IBU to be livid with his lack of thoughtfulness and how he's completely using others on a whim?

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 03/07/2018 14:43

Nope, he sounds like a selfish, thoughtless wanker to be honest! Your poor parents. Not sure why he would give your parents money though? Petrol money?

Returnofthesmileybar · 03/07/2018 14:47

Why the hell did you allow him any input on where your parents looked after the kids?? And why is he even phoning your parents?

downbutnotout2018 · 03/07/2018 14:48

yes petrol money- a token amount. Though my main issue is how he seems to think he can do what he wants, but not give a shit about putting other people out... They were saying how tired they were and he does this...

OP posts:
downbutnotout2018 · 03/07/2018 14:49

Return, because he made such a fuss and because my mum rang and he picked up the phone.

OP posts:
Aprilshouldhavebeenmyname · 03/07/2018 14:50

Ime exes won't do anything that makes your life easier.
Lesson learned op.

downbutnotout2018 · 03/07/2018 14:53

Yes April, it's like he's deliberately done it to anger everyone. Next time they're going to the grandparents house.

OP posts:
Guiltypleasures001 · 03/07/2018 15:05

Next time send him to his parents house and tell him to fecking stay there

Shumpalumpa · 03/07/2018 15:09

Is he your current or ex DP? You refer to him as both.

Get court ordered access, stop relying on him for childcare, he is using it to control you.

Guiltypleasures001 · 03/07/2018 15:10

Sorry op he's an ex

I wouldn't tell him nothing next time

Aprilshouldhavebeenmyname · 03/07/2018 17:10

I organised a surprise party for ds's birthday (on my contact day)
Exh let him go to the caravan with a friend and told him he could stay that day also.
To spite me.
But mostly hurt ds who missed his own party. Sad
Exh will do whatever it takes to piss us off ime.

LannieDuck · 03/07/2018 18:09

I'm confused. If he's an ex, who's contact days were they?

If they were his, he should be sorting out childcare anyway. If they were yours, why were they at your ex's in the first place?

Or do you both still live together?

rjay123 · 03/07/2018 18:15

Tell your parents to go back home. Let ex deal with childcare.

“Ooops must have misunderstood what was going on”

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