Quite often when we go to see my mum it overlaps with someone else visiting. All my family live far enough away that we have to properly stay with them to see them. Often the person staying tends to be my grandma. It is fine, though sometimes it would be nice to have them to myself it does give an opportunity to see my grandma which would be more difficult otherwise and the house is big enough to fit us.
I have organised with my mum that me and my dc will come stay with them later in the month. My husband will join us at the weekend. I've just been told by my sister that she wants to visit during the same week we go. She will be gone by the weekend. Though there is plenty of room it will mean that my dc will have to share a room either with me or with her cousins. In the past when sharing with us she has not slept well. But we haven't tried that for a long time (She is 3, I can't remember the last time we did it).
When I mentioned it to my husband he immediately started complaining about it saying that it's not on and changing plans about how he comes as he has decided I won't have had any sleep and won't be able to manage or drive home. I've then got annoyed with him because of him being negative and pointed out that we have started trying for another child, and when we have two they will have to share. He argued back that that wouldn't be for at least another year so she will be older, and sulked when I pointed out that tho she will be older, the other child will be younger. I also asked that he doesn't make me feel crap and stressed about the visit before we even get there. We are now both feeling cross at the other.
Disclaimer; I have been having health issues atm which we are waiting for diagnosis (think along the lines of rheumatoid arthritis) which include fatigue, but I am a sahm and usually cope fine with the early mornings and occasional night waking that we still have as well as entertaining her during the day.
He does get very anxious regarding her (and also lately me, tho generally when it means that he might have to do extra than he normally does) and every time we see anyone I have to do a careful balance of managing his moods because he's worrying about her sleeping/ travelling ok/ drinking etc. I thought that I would avoid this on this visit as we'd be gone and settled by the time we got there and not travelling with him.
So, who is unreasonable? Him for going off on one for something that will be over by the time he even gets there? Or me for getting cross at his grump about it when maybe he might have a point?