How fucking hard is it to not abuse someone?

[hisdadisanabusiveprick]

How fucking hard is it for a man to understand that if you abuse your kids mum they're entitled to take out a non molestation order against you?

How hard is it to comprehend that if you don't want them to have one you just don't behave in a way that provides the evidence for them to be granted one?

And how hard is it to think okay as long as I just don't harass or abuse her or emotionally abuse my child by making them watch the shit I do to her, or telling them crap about her or her life that I have made up - I can see my child and she won't stop contact

HOW FUCKING HARD IS THAT?!!!!

Very hard for some wankbadgers in this life.
I'm so sorry Op, my ex was abusive and it does get better. The twisted logic never fails to confuse me though.

Thank you @ChickenOrEgg6 and especially thank you for my new vocabulary expansion, I love that - "wankbadger" I will change his name to that in my phone I think 😂

What a fuckwit. Is say he isn't actually interested in seeing the kids, he is interested in the power play of trying to see them whilst loving that he can use the whole 'my ex is keeping them from me' excuse to feel vindicated. I hope you got to hang some of your anger, now try your best to disengage and protect yourself.

Impossible, I'm afraid, for someone who thinks the world and everything in it - especially women - exist for him and no other purpose.

You have my utmost sympathy. I am literally in the same boat. Been told if I take out an anti-mol order (advised by the flipping police for fucks sake) it will be held against me in court.

Whilst the physical abuse has stopped as he is no longer anywhere near us (obviously except when I have to hand them over), the emotional, financial abuse continues, makes allegations all over the place (thankfully they have been found to be wildly untrue), constant threats of court, taking dc away from me if I try to limit contact (genuinely concerned, he can't look after himself, let alone children), goes out of his way to try and dictate contact so that it is the most disruptive it can possibly be for me.

Still trying to control my every move. Using kids as a weapon. If I dare complain, I get 'she's an evil bitch, she won't let me see my kids, waaaaaaah', when the complete opposite is the case - he turns down contact or cancels it at the last minute.

Build up a bank of evidence. Write everything down, take pictures, have witnesses around when you see him. Keep everything in email/text. Create the biggest paper trail you possibly can, and you go and get the anti-mol order (I can't, for complicated reasons), but if someone else is able to prevent these absolute fucking twats from metaphorically stamping all over them, then that would make me very happy indeed.

In some cases it's seemingly impossible. My non mol order was police supported (he'd been arrested etc). He still told his solicitor that it was not needed and that he was a good boy despite the fact that I was still getting abusive texts and he was still sending the police round on trumped up nonsense. He still claims he's not abusive but ds got an abusive text from him not a week ago. The non mol order has already been extended for dd, so will now cover ds too. Ridiculous!
As others have said, keep evidence. I took screen shots of everything. Wrote it all down, the lot. The judge now renews the order every six months without question.
Good Luck.

PS. If you get in touch with the NCDV they'll help you get the order in place free of charge.