I have a question about the practise of being a Jehovah's Witness?

[LokiBear]

Please be aware, Im trying to understand better, not bash a religion or criticize in anyway.

Dd1 is having a birthday party - bowling, food and party bags. She wants to invite her friend who is a Jehovah's Witness. I do not know the little girls parents, but I do know the mums cousin, who is not a Jehovah's Witness. I asked if it would be ok to invite the girl and the cousin said not to bother, that the little girl would love to attend the party but wont be allowed and it will cause upset. So, we didn't. I explained carefully to dd that she couldnt invite her friend. 3 weeks after she sent her invites she is still asking me why the friend can't come. She pointed out that she recently joined in Eid celebrations despite it not being her religion. I snapped at dd today and told her to stop asking, that it wasnt nice to keep questioning someone elses beliefs and reiterated my warning that she was not to ask her friend about it because it might upset her. I feel really mean now because dd doesnt understamd and my explanations arent cutting it.
Does anyone know why Jehovah's Witnesses cant (or chooses not to) join in on other peoples celebrations? I want yo understand so I can help my dd understand.

How old is your daughter?

They don't celebrate birthdays as the ones mentioned in the Bible have negative associations. My friends give their dc a 'present day' not on the same day each year , and the dc gives each guest a token gift also.

I read something about this in the Watchtower. it was many, many years ago, so my recall was not a 100% but it was a bible passage (OT) about a birthday party and there is a huge massacre and everyone is killed.
JW were meant to read this to their children and then ask them, 'What do you think God is telling you about birthday parties?'

So, I probably wouldn't offer this explanation to your daughter but just say it it what they believe. Don't snap at her and it is perfectly ok to question beliefs - how is anyone meant to learn otherwise or develop empathy or critical thinking?

She will be 7. Thanks.

IME JW don't celebrate birthdays, easter xmas etc as part of their beliefs. As a result can't attend birthday parties of others, thats only from my limited knowledge from peopleI have cared for though

Just found this

www.jw.org/en/jehovahs-witnesses/faq/birthdays/

My dd has a friend who is a jw, at first I just sent an invite. However now I don’t bother as my dd knows she won’t be allowed to come. It’s ashame that she misses out but not much can do.
Reason being that they are not allowed to celebrate anyone’s birth except Jesus (I think)

We used to live next door to a family of JWs and I know they didn't celebrate Christmas, their own birthdays or other people's. The little girl wouldn't have been allowed to attend because JWs think it's a pagan tradition

That website is really helpful. Thanks :)

Pagan associations

Im going to tell DD that her friend doesnt celebrate birthdays because she and her family follow the teachings of the bible, and no one in the bible celebrated birthdays. Much better than 'I dont know why, they just dont'. Hopefully, the girl will be allowed to come for a playdate at some point. They are really lovely friends.

Personally I would just invite her and let her parents decide. I’m Jewish and don’t celebrate Christmas in a religious sense, but I wouldn’t be offended to be invited to midnight mass (nor for my dc to be invited). We would just respectfully decline but be grateful you thought of us anyway. It’s obviously not going to be the first time she’s been invited to something and she’ll understand she can’t come, but at least she won’t feel left out. I also wouldn’t discourage your dd from asking her about it. Kids are curious and no one will take offence to being asked about their beliefs. I’m sure they have to explain it all the time. It at least might help your dd not be worried about it too much.

I didnt invite her specifically because the mums cousin said it would cause upset at home. I'd rather not put a parent through that. One of dds friends invited her to a sleepover and we said no because she was only 6 and we didnt know the parents at all. Dd was so upset and we felt like crap. Id sooner not cause upset for someone else.