Leaving kids at home

[Nodancingshoes]

After some opinions - very, very undecided on this. I have 2 children aged 12 and 8. I have sorted the summer holidays with a mixture of annual leave and family help but have 1 week left. I will need to be at work for 6.5 hours on 3 of the days. Work is a 10 minute walk away from my house. Would you leave them at home?? My sister says yes but I am wary... We do leave them for short periods such as when we go to the supermarket. I think they will be ok but I guess I'm worried what others might think!

Personally, no I definitely wouldn’t leave them alone. 12 is too young to be in charge of a younger sibling. For me, you need to wait a couple more years to do this. 14 would be more acceptable.

What about kids clubs? Or is there another school parent who would look after them? You could offer to pay the parent.

If they get on well and the 12 year old is fairly responsible then I think it would be okay.

The 12 year old would be fine on their own. But not in charge of an 8 year old.

Personally no. The responsibility of the 8 yr old isn't fair on the 12 yr old.

I wouldn't. I wouldn't see it as fair to the 12 year old. I had to look after my younger brother when we were around the same age.

An 8 year old without a responsible adult? No, sorry, I wouldn't.

Yes I would see depending on how well they get on, but only as you work just down the road

It’s a tough one isn’t it.
It ultimately comes down to how your children are and how you think they will behave and if they would be ok with it. Some kids, no matter what the age shouldn’t be trusted and others are fine. Only you can answer this one. Go with what your gut tells you and if is telling you it will be ok (despite all the normal and often crazy parent worries we all have) then I would.
As for what others think, remember no one has your kids or in your exact circumstances and everyone has to do what’s right for them. There is no absolutly no right or wrong answer that works for all.

I think 8 is too young to be left at home. I'd say yes for a sensible 12 year old, but not being left in charge of a younger sibling.

No. It's too long to leave a 12 year old and an 8 year old to their own devices. They would probably be fine unless they aren't. Surely you can find another option for those 3 days. Send at least the 8 year old to play with a friend? Pay a trustworthy older teenager to supervise them? Holiday sports camp?

A responsible 12 yo would be fine but not looking after an 8 yo as well. Could your younger child go to a friends house in return for childcare another time?

12 yes especially if you can pop home briefly at some point or can ring every couple of hours to check ok- it'd have to be a maximum of 6.5 hours though . And be prepared they will probably be pretty bored/ on screens all day
8 no way in a million years
My eldest are 12 and nearly 10- I will only leave them together if I have to nip to shop, take other children somewhere- max half an hour

No to the 8 yo. The 12 yo depends on their maturity. I don’t think the 12 yo should be responsible for an 8 yo though.

I cancelled a hair app today as I had noone to be with/have my 11.5 yo. The 3 hours I would have been at the hairdressers seemed too long even though I would be only 5 mins away.

I will leave him up to an hour tops and then only if I am nearby - popping to local shop or walking the dogs.

12y - yes
8y - no
12y in charge of 8y - probably not, no

And just rechecked how long for; so I'd say no to 12y in charge of 8y. Maybe an hour, not several

It’s a long period of time to leave a 12 year old responsible for an 8 year old imo.

No from me as well, the 8 year old is too young, especially for that length of time.

Play dates for part of the day at s friends a possibility?

I have a 9+12 yo and no I wouldn't leave them. Wonder what the 9 yo is up to when I am in never mind out!!

Yep don't see a problem with those ages

No of course you can't. 8 is way too young...it's only one week, can't they go to a holiday club?

Thanks for your opinions. As I said, I am very wary of the suggestion and can see the general consensus is no. There is a holiday club although they moan about going. Back to the drawing board

Can't the family help with the one last week if they know your alternative is leaving them alone? If not I'd rather call in sick than leave my kids. They're too young imo

Holiday club for the 8yr old. For the 12 yr old if they are used to going to school and back it should be fine. Maybe arrange for them to meet up with some friends/ go swimming one or two days a week as a whole week alone would be boring.

Yes, I would and I did. 3 days for 6.5 hours seems very reasonable to me. I think it’s good for them to have some independence and responsibility.
I didn’t put the 12 yo “in charge”, he wasn’t responsible for his sister. They each were responsible for their own behaviour, getting themselves food, getting dressed in the morning, a chore or two etc.
They both enjoyed being home alone. Like you, we started gradually since they were younger and had lots of talks and made sure they understood the rules.

For the 8yr old I would just point out that when 12yr old was 8 they had to go to holiday club (assuming they did). If the 12yr old is anything like mine they won't want the 8yr old getting privileges much before they did.