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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be an emotional wreck about police interview

10 replies

stressedoutbunny · 30/06/2018 00:11

I'm due to be spending a couple of days doing police video interviews about an assault against me some years ago but is now being re-investigated. I'm petrified. I can't sleep properly. I'm either snapping or crying or just completely emotionally detached.
Any police or people who have been through this type of thing to help me prepare for what it's like? I've spent years trying to block out any memories and now I need to recall as much as I can it feels like I can't remember anything Sad

OP posts:
GreenTulips · 30/06/2018 00:15

They will ask you gentle questions and review any answers.

One will interview one will be watching and recording.

They will say it's not up to them to believe you or not they are only there to collect evidence - if they feel you've missed a bit they will pick up on that.

MrsCatE · 30/06/2018 00:17

Handhold? Flowers not very useful I know. Remember, you WILL get your say x

HotSauceCommittee · 30/06/2018 00:19

Ask for a referral to their victim support service; they may give practical and emotional help. Good luck.

GreenTulips · 30/06/2018 00:20

Oh and you can add bits later if you remember something

Skittlesandbeer · 30/06/2018 00:40

Sounds like you need some backup. Book yourself a couple of counselling sessions, before and after. It’s probably not so much the interviews themselves that are worrying you, but needing to remember negative things and drag up emotions you’d rather forget. There’s help for that.

Reliving past hurts is never fun, but there’s a real upside here. The perpetrator might be brought to justice, and it’s also an opportunity for you to deal with the trauma rather than suppressing it. You might be surprised at how positively you deal with all this. You might come out proud of yourself, and with a new confidence. You’re not the person you were back then. You’re older, wiser and probably see things quite differently.

On the practical side, why not try setting up a time for yourself to ‘properly remember’ this incident. Nice cuppa, somewhere peaceful, something to look forward to planned for after, notebook in hand. Write down any snippets you recall, and after 30 mins say to yourself ‘well that’s ok, I’m done for today.’ And put it aside in your mind until the next session. Like opening and closing a filing cabinet in your mind.

Good luck, you’ll be fine.

Andromeida59 · 30/06/2018 00:48

It is awful but remember you are in control of this. They will be gentle with you but this is the opportunity to have your say. You can speak to Victim Support if you need help. Just tell them exactly what you know. You can't do anymore than that. Sending Flowers to you.

Heighwayqueen · 30/06/2018 00:52

Police have been trained in how to interview vulnerable witnesses. They will be as gentle as possible, so don't worry about them being aggressive or impatient with you.

But I'm guessing it’s actually having to re-live it all that's actually making you stressed. There should be a victim support or victim liason arwa they can refer you too for help and support.

stressedoutbunny · 13/07/2018 23:14

Thank you ladies for your helpful responses. It didn't go well. And ever since I have been stuck with either having awful flashbacks or nightmares or just away with the fairies in my own world. Sleep is not my friend and I'm running on empty and need this to stop

OP posts:
MissionItsPossible · 14/07/2018 03:50

This sounds like a normal response. Sorry OP Flowers I haven’t been in the situation and it sounds awful but maybe try and focus on it’s doing a greater good? I know that may be not what you want to hear right now. Not really sure what to say. Maybe talk to a counsellor or the Samaritans or even on here if not too identifying I’m sure many would like to help or PM me or someone else Flowers

Monty27 · 14/07/2018 03:59

Is there a charitable group around that would accompany you? Victim support maybe?

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