To think you don't pay child maintenance if you live with your partner and kids?

[whywudhedodat]

Stbexh lives with his gf and their 2 kids. He pays her monthly child maintenance through direct bank transfer. I know this as we've had to exchange bank statements to do the financial settlement part of the divorce. He lives there though so I don't understand why he is doing this and he refuses to answer about it. Anyone experienced this or have any idea why he might be doing it? I don't trust him at all and it seems very odd.

He’s paying child maintenance to his girlfriend for their children even though he lives there with them? Full time? Are you sure he still lives there,

What's their financial arrangement got to do with you? You don't trust him in what respect?

Benefits

It could be she is claiming as a single parent. I knew someone that was claiming as a single parent and to make it seem legit she got her partner to transfer her money sent child maintenance.

@ZibbidooZibbidooZibbidoo yes he definitely lives there. He's nowhere of his own. It's her house.

Either he has another family or they're on the rob with benefits.

Is that the description he has put on his own standing order? Perhaps it's 'housekeeping' or his share of family finances and he just labelled it in a daft way?

Your stbx? But has kids with her? I imagine it's his share of the bills etc. Why do you all think it's odd?

We don’t have a joint account and my partner transfers me money each month as all bills etc come from my account. Nothing dodgy re benefits etc. Just easier for us?

Why do you think it’s child maintenance. When I was married we had separate finances - bills etc came out of my account and thenH had a monthly standing order to me for an amount we had agreed on. Wasn’t maintenance, it was his share of the monthly expenses.

Does he pay bills too on top?

I can't say too much as outing and still doing finances for court. The payments are labelled as maintenance. Maybe it is for bills but not put as that. There's other stuff that's very odd but don't want to put myself.

I would imagine the sensible woman wants to keep her finances separate from his. Doesn't sound like the most trustworthy of men. Are they "living together" or is she just giving the dad of her DC a roof over his head until he gets his own place?

I think you should focus on you & your future. Pettifogging over how a standing order is labelled won’t do you any favours

@DocTrouble living together with plans to marry once we are divorce.

@SoapOnARoap he has to explain he finances as part of the divorce settlement.

Do you have any children with him? My thought is it could be to make any payment to your children less if he is already paying child maintenance? But then I’m an old cynic!

Do you have children together? Of so its probably so he can minimise his maitenance to you. Its a common thing to do for avoiders.

We have three children together. He has two with her and she has others from a previous relationship.

Have you gone to the CMS? If they've done an assessment how have they treated his other children? Either they are members of his household, and serve to reduce his income before your maintenance is calculated, or he pays for 3 or more children of which yours (I don't know how many you have with him) get their share.

Maintenance could be for his share of the bills etc, I think you are reading it as child maintenance, and reading more into it than there is.

OP that's probably just how they decided to sort their finances out e.g. by giving things labels. I read some article a few days ago about how you shouldn't have strange references for bank transfers from other people as it causes problems getting mortgages.

Btw how old are the children? As if they need any form of childcare it likely covers his share of this.

Me and my DH have separate bank accounts and he transfers money into my account when he gets paid because I manage all household expenses. He gets to keep the money that he can spend as he pleases and if he blows it in 2 days then the bills still get paid. It's what works for us.

Either benefit/tax credit fraud (is this likely?) or he has another two DC somewhere. Is the transfer definitely to her?

If it's for bills why say it's child maintenance? Does t make sense. He's not being honest and is refusing to explain other financial discrepancies so that's why I'm suspicious as is my solicitor.

"Maintenance" has a specific meaning when it comes to transfers between households, though. It doesn't mean "contribution to shared living costs". And it most definitely is the OP's business if it reduces her entitlement in the divorce settlement. She's got a life to carry on living too. I think it's fair enough to query it.