To not know how to handle this neighbour?

[wishiwasapenguin]

Moved into our house about 6 months ago.
It’s a “naice” area if that makes any difference.
Anyway, the houses are detached and neighbours on 1 side are retired and in their early 60s by the look of it.
I’m not sure if they have alcohol problems (particularly the man) but when we put our recycling boxes out weekly theirs contains at least 50 cans of lager, 10 or so bottles of wine and a couple of bottles of spirits. I’ve not been nosing honestly, but they have 2 recycling boxes purely filled with empties.
When you look out of the window from 9am onwards they’ll be sat with cans and also from 4pm onwards they sit out the front still drinking.
Anyway not sure how relevant that is.
So the problem is that they play music in their garden from 9am until 10pm. Again, it’s not massively loud so although annoying as we don’t get any peace and quiet I’ve just let it slide. A couple of times a week he gets very drunk and sings karaoke style, but hey ho.
Also they have a couple of little dogs that he’s started to goad when we are out in the garden, so he’ll drunkenly shout “more noise Rusty, more noise” and wind them up to purposely bark for 30/40 mins solid.
If our dog goes out in the garden then he will do a solitary bark back at the dogs but I immediately stop him. The man then goads his dog again “you fucking tell them Rusty” etc.
He’s started to comment on our kids too, who play nicely, but are preschoolers and do giggle and run around. He’s started saying “I can fucking hear them giggling again” etc etc.
And when my toddler falls over and cries he’ll shout “he’s always fucking tripping up and crying that kid”
I now try and take them inside as soon as they cry or whinge as I’m worried about annoying the neighbours.
But I don’t know how to deal with this?
Keep a log? Or just ignore it?
It seems to get worse and louder the more he drinks.
Plus he tends to start on the wife then screaming “I told you to leave that fucking door open” etc.
Advice please?

Keep a log and report to the council? You lot have been spending too much time on t'internet. There isn't a great deal of noise and that isn't the main problem the OP is having. Also, council intervention, which will involve a letter at best, will most likely antagonise him. So by reporting him to the council OP will make things worse.

I don't have any great ideas to make things better but I would try to speak to him before he gets drunk or befriend him. Just enough for him to not want to annoy you too much. Nothing involved but take an interest in him and make like you respect him and value his opinion. It may be enough of an incentive for him to moderate his behaviour somewhat. I wouldn't have any high hopes though, but it's something to try before you think of moving.

Play your own music in the garden to try to drown him out?! And I’d put the house on the market as soon as the temperature drops enough to drive him and his sofa back inside.

My elderly parents are going through a similar thing with their neighbour who's in his 40's. The neighbour is always calling the police and the council and blaming my parents for harassment. My mother has had two strokes and my father has had one which they say was brought on by this neighbour and his antics. Mediators have visited both parties to try and resolve said issues. My parents were informed by the police to stay indoors if they didn't like his actions and that the neighbour was allowed to play loud music late on a night and bang and slam doors and play recordings of dogs barking at full volume when he went out. My parents are victims in all of this and the only thing they can think is that the neighbour is forever ringing up and making false accusations, which are then followed up. Make sure you report everything and get cctv if need be. Also record on your phone. The police won't do anything unless threats are made.

Not in a position to move annoyingly. Re done all of our bathrooms and kitchen, new carpets throughout and whole house decorated so couldn’t afford to move right now.
It’s not a forever house tho, perhaps move when I can pick up more hours when the kids are all at school!
So just to cope for another few years 😩

An acquaintance had similar issues. The Environmental Health advised her to report the abusive behaviour to the Police. They have a designated Anti-Social Behaviour Unit, usually.

The Neighbour was threatened with being arrested for Anti-Social behaviour, drunk and disorderly (which still applies on your own property) and a potential Breach of the Peace.

It depends on how far you want to take it.

Great.
I’ll keep an eye and just hope it doesn’t escalate.
At least in the winter I can’t hear him!

Bluntly, if he is drinking that amount regularly then it won't be too long before he starts to suffer major health problems.

I would keep a log of the dog barking and any abusive comments directed at you. If he is winding up the dog then get a recording.

Otherwise just ignore - he is looking for a reaction - he sounds like a stroppy drunk who wants an argument.

As far as the Police were concerned he was verbally abusing the children, even if indirectly. But it's definitely Drunk and Disorderly conduct.

Personally, I wouldn't be able to put up with it. The barking wouldn't bother me, as much as the commentary on my children or Grandchildren.

P.S.
If you are planning to sell in the next few years don't go to the police as you might have to declare it to future purchasers.

I’m wondering whether the previous owners had problems with him? They were here 3 years and put the house on the market 3 times. They never mentioned it though.

You will have to declare any issues with the neighbours if you report it.

You must be kidding chaz. The alcoholic I’m closest to has been going 40 years with no signs of stopping. The neighbour is already well last middle age himself! I wouldn’t be counting on illness/ death just get

*just yet

I can't suggest anything else OP (other than doing a rain dance) but you have my full sympathy. We've had neighbour issues in the past and it's really unpleasant to have to deal with. Now you know why the former owners sold up.

Aaahhh peace and quiet. He seemed v drunk earlier and it’s been v hot here so maybe he’s passed out for the night!

Glint
My experience has been different. The people I am thinking of didn’t make it much into their 60’s before the decline started.

There must be a good chance of him having a fall and injury on that amount of booze, or dropping the sofa on his foot.
cAn you attempt to win him/ her over by speaking to him when he’s outside. Admire the dogs, comment on the weather etc. But I wouldn’t do that until you’ve several weeks record of his behaviour. In case that backfires and he gets worse.
What do other neighbours say?

Record him, give them a copy and say you're keeping it for evidence of nuisance.

Kill him (literally) with kindness - leave a large bottle of vodka on his doorstep every morning!

Phone the council and ask if there were complaints from your vendors. You can sue their asses if they didn’t declare neighbourly disputes. Or maybe they tolerated and sold ASAP?

I empathise hugely, we had upstairs neighbours play music 7pm-7am as loud as the equipment would go. It was torturous. We moved. Sorry.

Other neighbours are friends of friends so we semi know them.
They’ve never had any problems with the neighbours, BUT they’re never really home. They both work 5 days a week and are out of the house 7am-6.30pm. Their child is in childcare this whole time so their house is empty. Plus they have no dog. Oh and they have a holiday cottage which they use pretty much every weekend throughout the summer so there is literally no noise coming from their house.
They’re not direct neighbours, the way the houses were built they are more at the bottom of their garden with 2 x 10m gardens separating the houses, so they can hear the music, but very faintly.
They’ve commented about seeing him staggering around drunk and have commented on the amount they drink as we all put our recycling boxes out on the same corner, but it doesn’t really affect them I suppose.

Didn’t know I could call the council to find out if there were any disputes before we bought. Interesting.

It should’ve come up in the standard searches. But you can’t really sue their asses off. It probably wouldn’t even be worth doing

Don't complain. It'll make the place harder to sell. And you will need to sell it and move. Of course he's an alcoholic. Just because he's put up a nice lean-to doesn't mean he's not an alcoholic. He is and it's going to go on and on, probably getting worse. I'd be out of there asap, sorry.

Not going to complain officially after speaking to husband last night. We don’t want to declare it if we move.
So another day of all day drinking and we’ve currently got karaoke style singing along to bloody opera, interspersed with him staggering around the garden randomly shouting “come on England” about 3 hours before the bloody football even starts.
My 2 kids playing quietly with a bucket of pebbles.
I long for the day I can hear bird song and children playing.