Waking up teenager for school?

[nina19877]

Who would you say is responsible for waking up a teenager for senior school? If a child struggles to wake up i think it's a parents responsibility but my friend says it's the teenagers? Her teenage dd always over sleeps and everyday is late for school, i think my friend should be waking her up but friend says its her dd's own fault if she's late.

Since I go to work before DDS alarm goes off it's up to her.I just give her a kiss goodbye.
To be fair she has always been up on-time especially nowadays as she likes to wash her hair everyday.But yes it's their responsibility it goes with the growing freedoms they're allowed as they get older.

I wake my DD up. She's still a child not an adult so I still take responsibility for her. She would definitely oversleep if I didn't wake her up and her being late for school everyday would do no-one any favours. Your friend sounds a bit odd.

It is the teenagers.
But.
If the teenager doesn't take responsibility it is the parents.

1. Supply alarm clock, preferably one that automatically resets for the following day, even better if can set different times for weekday and weekend.
2. Ensure electronics out of room at reasonable time - do not allow 'I'm using phone as my alarm' . (See point 1)
3. Consequences for being late

13yo - 15yo = parents.
16 yo - 19yo = teen.

I was chronically sleep deprived as a teenager, and just couldn't get out of bed, even with an alarm clock so I would say it's the parent's. I needed physical assistance from a second person, usually having water chucked on me. Dragging me out of the bed didn't work because I'd sleep on the floor!

Even as an adult, I'd occasionally have to co-opt other people to make sure I woke up if I knew I was falling behind on my sleep. It's taken me 15 years to stumble on a solution I can manage myself. You can't reasonably expect a teenager to do it.

I think it depends on the teenager. I’m useless in the mornings. I’ve always needed shouted up. Several times. My DS(12) is great. He sets his own alarm and is up at 7 and in the shower everyday while I snooze my head off.

I supply the clock radio. If they can't manage to get themselves up/ready/out using just that then they need more sleep and I am happy to take away devices /wifi password until they get it.

My younger teen gets a cup of tea in bed every morning. My dad always used to bring me a cup of tea in bed right through school.

It's my responsibility as a parent to instil in my children the responsibility of being on time and to be respectful of other people's time.

It will be your friend that gets the fine, not her dd. That tells me where the ultimate responsibility lies.

Son has a 9pm 'bedtime' during the week - he can do whatever he likes in his bed so long as it doesn't involve phone, TV or computer - none are allowed in his bedroom (or mine for that matter). I wake him in the morning, and then will shout up to him twice (til I get a reply each time) if he doesn't come downstairs, but after that he's on his own. He was once late, when he was 15, but never has been again. Teenagers need more sleep than they think (Son goes nocturnal during the holidays), and being in a moderately boring environment gets them to unwind and fall asleep sooner I think - and the same for adults, which is why I do the same for me. It's easier to get up if you have had enough sleep.

So really it depends what the OP's friend is doing to assist with the teen. If parents are making sure the teen is getting enough sleep and being woken at a decent time, then they are then letting that teen have the natural consequences for being late, which I would think is fine - part of letting them grow up. If they know the teen is up into the early hours gaming, and then not giving them some form of prompt at least once if they don't appear, then it's a bit much IMO.

People may disagree with the prompting, but if I knew anybody had to be at a certain place at a certain time, and they hadn't appeared, I'd give them a knock.

If the child over sleeps regularly they need to go to bed earlier and practice sleep hygiene. If they are still over sleeping after working up to an extra 3 hours sleep for a couple of weeks then if they are a teenage girl they should get checked to see if they have iron deficiency anaemia.

Teenagers should be able to get themselves up as long as they have an alarm clock.

Obviously there are occasions when everyone over sleeps then you get them up but it shouldn't be a regular occurrence.

Ultimately it's the parents job to get their child to school and they're the ones responsible if their child is repeatedly late or doesn't turn up at all.

That being said, my parents often left for work before I even got up for school so in my house, it was my responsibility! My dad would give me a shout if he was around but otherwise it was my job to be at the bus stop on time. I think most teenagers should be capable of getting themselves up and out of the door on time (even if they don't want to).

Parents! and it's the parents' responsibility to moan about it to the teen.

You have to be pretty spiteful to allow someone under your roof to be late because they don't wake up. They might be teens, but they are still your kids, they will be living alone soon enough.

I think the teenager should get themselves up, but if they clearly haven't, the parent should bang on their door/give them a shout.

I'd do the same for DH if he'd overslept.