Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To never see MiL again?!

75 replies

Dyingofembarrassment · 24/06/2018 22:14

NC for this, for reasons that will become obvious...

Our washing machine is currently broken. MiL (who is kind and lovely, this is not your average MiL thread) offered to do a couple of loads for us, so we took a suitcase over today. I put the first load in the machine and then DH and I took DS out swimming. When we came back, that load had finished so she had taken it out and packed it into carrier bags for us to take home to dry. All ok so far.

I've just hung everything up now. In one of the carrier bags, on top of the pile of folded clothes (no idea why she folded them knowing I was only going to hang them up at the other end, but never mind) was a small, black COCK RING. Blush

Yes, it it ours (well, DH's). But I haven't seen it in years, and neither of us have a clue how it got into our laundry. There is no chance she doesn't know what it is.

We can never go to her house or see or speak to her ever again, can we?!?

OP posts:
Ilovemypantry · 24/06/2018 23:29

Oh my 😱😱

81Byerley · 24/06/2018 23:34

I'm 68 too...we know what's what! Sex doesn't change or stop when your kids are grown up! If that was me, I'd just laugh about it!

Arum51 · 24/06/2018 23:52

Lmao - when we were out one time, ex MIL took it upon herself to tidy our bedroom. There were several, shall we say, "instruction manuals" for "unusual activities" lying around. She had kindly put them into a neat pile next to the bed. She couldn't possibly have failed to know what they were, as they were books!

I just brazened it out, and never mentioned it Grin

Original poster
Dyingofembarrassment · 24/06/2018 23:55

incy if she'd kept it I'd never have known - like I said, I hadn't seen it for years. Not sure if that would be better or worse though!

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 24/06/2018 23:56

Under similar circumstances I found my DD's vibrating tongue ring.

It was never spoken about, but we both know it happened.

Birdsgottafly · 24/06/2018 23:58

I also found out that she had her nipples pierced on the day I was with her at the hospital, when she was a day patient.

I changed the subject.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 25/06/2018 00:03

I honestly don't get the hysteria, it's not like she's never had sex or is oblivious to the fact a happily married couple will also be having sex.

Cock rings are pretty tame when it comes to sex "aids" so quite honestly if my dad found this in my washing (mum passed years ago) i wouldn't be phased at all, nor would i care if my boyfriends parents found it in our washing.

Abandoned · 25/06/2018 00:14

This thread reminds me of the day my late father shouted from the kitchen "Hey (my name), your boyfriend doesn't need any Viagra does he? I've got loads here......" 😧😳

Abandoned · 25/06/2018 00:17

@Chattymummyhere @GreenTulips Wrong! It has a different erm, primary purpose...

To never see MiL again?!
Jenasaurus · 25/06/2018 00:23

speaking as a lady in her 50's im afraid to say OP I would definitely know what it was...ahem, but don't worry, it just confirms you have a sex life with her son and I am guessing she suspected that anyway :)

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 25/06/2018 00:42

Very early in my relationship with DW2B, FIL made us a small lamp from a piece of yew. Beautiful little thing. He gave to me with the remark "it'll save you getting cold when you want a bit of light on the subject". Completely deadpan. God I miss him.

ScarlettSahara · 25/06/2018 01:01

I would think she knows what’s what OP. Act nonchalant or tell her you’re having a trial as an Anne Summers rep! Grin

MiddleClassProblem · 25/06/2018 01:29

Could you not pretend it’s the foot fallen off some kind of furniture? Random bits like that turn up in our house all the time. Bits off electricals and furniture, not cockrings just to clarify... 😳

smurfy2015 · 25/06/2018 03:14

Il start off by saying FUCK OFF DAILY MAIL - less chance of them stealing it now i hope

Reminds me of when i was moving house a couple of years ago, while i was packing up one room MIL2B went ahead and started emptying 2 sets of drawers in front left bedroom unaware one set of drawers was toys.

She packed the whole lot and it was perfectly obvious what they were, no hiding it. We are open minded with each other (me and my OH) the strap on, the dental dams, butt plugs, ben wa balls, the condoms, the ropes, blindfolds, whips, restraints, about 10 different flavours of lube. Yes to cock rings, pink drawstring bags with vibes inside, clamps, the karma sutra, anal beads, crotchless knickers, remote control egg and control she put inside a small food bag to keep together, The whole shebang, she packed up in a small box marked fragile and important paperwork to be dealt with by me and OH.

When i realised what had happened, she gave me a knowing look and asked me to stick the kettle on. I went to the kitchen and laughed and head in hands at same time with mortification. Never mentioned again except me telling OH as soon as i possibly could who said to her that she had come across some private stuff today, to which her answer was. You are both over 18. Have fun. Mega cringe. Never mentioned again after that.

Cinderella2018 · 25/06/2018 03:17

My attitude is that if they can’t/won’t say anything, it’s as good as never happened!

LapsedHumanist · 25/06/2018 03:46

Emigrate.

A colleague asked me round to their house one day for lunch. We had lovely sandwiches- felafel, avocado, buffalo mozzarella, basil, seasalt & honey IIRC- in their new dining kitchen.

Butt plug on the draining board.

I was deterred from return by hygiene aspect more than anything.

Kissmycousinkate · 25/06/2018 07:54

We'll probably see another thread soon " help I've put my cock ring in my Ds and DIL washing" lol

flapjackfairy · 25/06/2018 08:00

MILs have sex lives too you know !
Infact she may have a trick or two to teach you Wink

Ohmydayslove · 25/06/2018 08:03

Lol I am a 50 year old mil and I would have teased you both somehow. No way would that escape teasing in our house hold. Grin probably give my ds a new one for Christmas with your usual gift thinking you might need a new one after the washing machine.

I expect your mil found it funny.

There’s many a good time played on an old fiddle you know I expect are still has her moments. Grin

Original poster
Dyingofembarrassment · 25/06/2018 11:26

@flapjackfairy That's a conversation I NEVER want to have!Shock

OP posts:
Whatwaswrongwiththatusername · 25/06/2018 11:45

@Littlechocola I'm loving the idea of it being a travel teething ring! 😂
Hope your competition win was an appropriate size Grin

Notagainmun · 25/06/2018 12:19

I would have had a little chuckle and be glad my adult DC was having a fun relationship and then forget about it. Hope your MIL thinks the same way.

Racecardriver · 25/06/2018 12:24

Oh dear. She does sound like a dream though. Are you sure she knew what it was? I would have probably assumed it was a part from something or other.

LeighaJ · 25/06/2018 12:30

AppleKatie

"If it’s not acknowledged it never happened."

^This

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread