To be scared of London Living?

[Teaandbiscuits35]

I’ve lived in London my entire life (bar a few years studying), I’m nearing 40 and have a good husband and healthy, happy kids. I’m pretty settled in life and the happiest I’ve been in years. But I’m scared all the time. Crime rate is ridiculously high here and there is no police presence. I’m scared when I go out and I’m scared when I’m at home. I’m on edge all the time and although I’m trying not to show it in front of DC it’s exhausting. My neighbours change frequently and are often loud and aggressive. Financially, I have no chance of moving for at least another five years. AIBU to be so scared or do I just need to accept that this is my life for the time being?

As other have said though, if it does really worry you to an unbearable extent, is there any reason why you wouldn’t consider we moving somewhere further out? You’d probably get more space and better schools too. We live relatively centrally because we both really value a short commute and DS is only a toddler. But will maybe move further out when he’s a teen.

I also live near you and there were three burglaries on our road in a month late last year, they put our neighbour's bi-fold doors in and helped themselves. Someone got shot outside a local bar last week and so on.

I'm not scared for myself but worry about young teens getting involved in county lines drug running and CSE.

London smells and people are moody. I'm hoping that we can move out before the mayor's low emission zone reaches us in 2021 and means that I'll get charged £15 every time I drive to the supermarket in my old banger - I can't afford to change to a brand new electric car and my car is essential for work. I digress. But basically it's more of a shithole than dangerous.

London smells and people are moody. I'm hoping that we can move out before the mayor's low emission zone reaches us in 2021 and means that I'll get charged £15 every time I drive to the supermarket in my old banger

Can you not see the connection between 'London smells' and driving an old banger?

I live in London, born and bred, and I don’t feel as safe as I used to. I lived in central London for years, now SW London/Surrey borders. I still work in central London.

My main worry is not the stabbing (although that is a worry, it tends to be gang related) - it is the moped muggers. They are getting more and more audacious and seemingly unstoppable by the law. I understand moves are afoot to change laws - currently the police don’t chase some of them because the muggers are not wearing helmets and the police are aware that they may crash during a high speed crash and the repercussions afterwards would be against the police rather than the muggers. They might also ban passengers on the back of mopeds, which seems a bit harsh for those genuinely giving lifts.

Acid attacks seem to be on the rise too. It seems to be the weapon of choice for a lot of people. I work not far from Westminster. Pimlico is nearby - a strange area - very rich, but with lots of social housing. There have been stabbing there. I was walking to my mainline station and an air ambulance was in a local square taking a stabbing victim to hospital.

But terroist activity is the main worry. As I type Charing X station is closed due to a bomb threat. At this time of year the lone wolf acts step up - Westminster Bridge, Borough Market, Finsbury Park mosque - all took place last year around this time.

I don’t walk around like a jibbering wreck, but I am more mindful of not wearing my good watch, not using my phone in the street etc.

I'm hoping that we can move out before the mayor's low emission zone reaches us in 2021 and means that I'll get charged £15 every time I drive to the supermarket in my old banger - I can't afford to change to a brand new electric car and my car is essential for work.

You don't need an electric car, apparently my four-year-old petrol Golf will not be affected by this. It might be cheaper for you to change cars than move.

I don’t know how it is remotely possible to have read all the info about the ultra-low emission zone and conclude that it will mean that only electric cars will be allowed inside it!

We moved out of London earlier this year, for mainly financial reasons. But in the time it took for our house to get sold we had a fatal stabbing, a shooting and an acid attack - all within 1/4 mile of our house.

We now live in a seaside town undergoing a regeneration. It's great but there is still lots of white poverty - and aspirations are generally lower in our particular area. You don't feel unsafe in the streets at night but you do see a lot of eyebrow raising day to day behaviour - smoking mums pushing buggies, swearing kids not in school etc. There's also a definite UKIP feel to the place.

I feel my children are safer here but I do worry that they may have fewer opportunities open to them as they get older.

On balance I am still glad we moved, but don't assume it's rosier outside London. It's just different.

Thanks for the replies.
Moped and acid attacks are on my list of big worries too as is my teenager.
I know that there have been things happening for decades but I was too young to notice or be so scared by it all.
I’m in social housing due to low income, me and my husband both work and pay full rent but it’s considerably lower than if we rented private. I’m also studying part time which means I need childcare in the form of parents since my wages wouldn’t cover it if I had to pay after school care as well as everything else (DS in currently in reception so have many more years of this). I’m tied to this area for the time being.
Ignorance may definitely be bliss and I will definitely unfollow the social media pages that I keep seeing these knives that have been seized from children younger than my teen. Logically, I get that the chance of something happening to my kids, hubby or myself are low. Maybe I need to look at dealing anxiety as a separate issue, maybe this is just how it’s showing itself.

Maybe you could look at a council house swap if you wanted to move, they also have possibly distance study things. There may be ways..

and yes to unfollowing FB stuff. I unfollow illness groups it makes it worse!

www.gov.uk/apply-swap-homes-council

www.houseexchange.org.uk

@LovelyBath77 thank you for that, will have a look.
Tbh I don’t really want to move, I just want to feel a bit safer and less anxious all the time.

There is a website where you can type in your postcode and it will show you the crime stats as collected by police. UK crime stats

@K0k0 I think it's Up My Street, though I have to say I didn't find it especially comforting

That’s in the last month or so. 😟 Especially as a mum of a teen who has no choice but to work so can’t drive her to and from anywhere that scares the shit out of me!

Have you or your family actually suffered any crime yourself, OP? I live in inner London and it's been many years since I've suffered any crime personally (though important to have good home safety measures and keep your eyes open when you're out of the house, of course).

I live in a small town in Scotland. There are burglaries all the time. There have been murders 2 streets either side of me and a few at the other side of town in the past year - that I know of. I live not far from Glasgow.

Glasgow is considered one of the top most dangerous places to live in Europe and yet people here in Scotland would say that London is worse. They might be scared even travelling down to London. I don't know, but I wonder if it's just because London crime makes the top news more. I have family that live in London, so maybe I should compare notes.

OP do you own a house in London? If so would it not be possible to sell it (all properties in London sell for a fortune) and relocate further up North? X

@Ifailed well that will solve the pollution problem then if my car is off the road. Thanks for the heads up.

@jess I need a car for my job, an "essential car driver" role. maybe the mayor would like to increase public sector pay then I can buy one which meets the regulations in order to do my job and not pay every day for the privilege 🙄

I used to live in a area of North London where moped crime and general theft/attacks. I was fine when I arrived there. I lived in various areas and never felt unsafe I could take the night bus at 4 Am without a care in the world. I was definitely not scared of my own shadow. 15 months in that area have left me having cold sweat at the sound of a scooter. I was living a nightmare everytime I was out. I started to have bad anxiety.

Since I moved, everything is back to normal for me. Any chance you can move to another area of London? There might not be a need to leave London completely.

*in an area of North London where moped crime and general theft/attacks were high

@niceupthedance I’m not sure why you are singling me out, I didn’t say that you should give up your car! I said that you had misunderstood the regulations if you thought that everyone driving in the ULEZ had to have a “brand new electric car”.

Sammymommy were you actually attacked, or did you see someone attached, or did you just get anxious because of what you had seen in the media? Not criticising, just curious.

Been attacked, as did 2 of my neighbours and I saw 2 strangers being attacked.

Sorry to hear that. How far did you move, zone-wise? Eg 2 to 5, 3 to outside tube rang etc?

I think I'm in the same outer area as you

It's definitely more unpleasant than ever

A lot of it will be sheer dumb luck

My neighbour was knocked to the ground on the school run because of her smart looking bag

They threw her down with such force they broke her arm and shoulder

It was done so fast no one had time to help

We are looking at leaving, it will take a long time to improve if it ever does. But it's the overcrowding that gets me down more than fear of crime. I do think crime is much worse in summer, we had noticeably fewer issues in winter and with my shifts, I noticed even look cal gangs weren't out on the colder nights.