If I'm slightly peeved that my ex is still mates with his ex before me?

[bohemianbint]

yeah, ok, I know, I am. Hideously unreasonable, especially since it was bloody years ago and I'm really happy with my man and boy. But she was alway flirting with him while we were together and it was a bit dosge, and it's almost as if this confirms it.

Ok, let me have it then.

"she was always flirting with him while we were together" - but you're still together aren't you? And what's dosge?

Sorry, not being sarky, just don't fully understand your post.

Wouldn't like it if my dh were in communication (let alone friendly) with an ex girlfriend.

Ooops, bloomin typos, it should say dodge as in dodgy. And no, he's an ex boyfriend who I'm still good friends with even though the relationship ended years ago. Currently very happy with my DP and our child. Which is why I don't understand why I'm a bit peeved. Probably because I'm a nutter. Actually, it's not like I have time to be very bothered, just slightly niggled. If that makes sense?!

My ex married the ex two before me a couple of years ago. Which I was for various reasons rather pissed off about. They're now divorced, though

Are you mates with any of your ex's and if so how does your DP feel about that?

I am mates with most of mine. DP occasionally refers to 'yet another bloke you've shagged', especially the couple that he sometimes works with.

I like knowing how they are. I'm nosy. Obviously I would also like them somewhere in their hearts to feel there has Never Been Anyone Quite Like Motherinferior, but that's only out of vanity.

LMAO Motherinferior

I'm still mates with quite a few exes. I don't think DP's that ecstatic about it but he's very mature. I'd kill him if he so much as emailed one of his. That's really not fair is it?!

DP only keeps up with the one who is now a lesbian (clearly no other man could match up and she turned, sadly, to Sapphism ).

Don't they say that you should look to how your man treats his ex as a guide as to what sort of person he really is?

He sounds like a diamond. If he starts to think you think something is going on between them, they'll have a shared bond against you, 'the enemy'!! I'd much rather be seen as someone brave enough to trust and give him his leash. If he'd wanted to shag her again he probably wouldn't be with you now.

Besides, the old adage, keep your friends close and your enemies closer...much better that you can keep an eye on what they're doing!

well, that's worrying! Previous exes have usually been up to no good with their exes! Although actually, that's probably why I'm not with them anymore. Current man and babyfather has nothing to do with any of his, which is good because I am a bit of a jealous psycho.

When I first met him my dh had a v jealous ex who tried to split us up. She turned up unexpectedly to college, got the cleaner to let her in dh's room and where she proceeded to get into his bed naked. That's the ex, not the cleaner of course. Three years later when dh and I got married she threatened to turn up at the wedding, but thankfully we were spared. Every Christmas after that she has sent him a card and round robin letter - to his parents' address as she doesn't know where we live. She has been married to some one else for most of that time and we have never contacted her ourselves. It's about 28 years since they had a 2 or 3 month fling and I do wonder whether she hasn't got many friends.

I actually met my DH through one of his ex's. In those days, she was very posh, skinny, owned lovely big house in best area of the town, loads of money, great job, great car, etc. A perfect match for DH as I was a single (teenage) mum, with a grotty council house on a grotty estate - bit overweight, absolutely no dress sense whatsoever...and gobby. She was adamant that he and I were suited - but TBH, I couldn't stand him. Anyway, to cut a long story short - we've been maried 22 years this year (and apart from some recent up and downs - very happy). We'e both still friends with her. But the funny thing is, my MIL once thanked me for marrying him becasue it saved him frome the friend (wierd or what).

I wouldn't worry about it - he's yours, not hers.

Depends.

Um, you're jealous about your ex not your current DP right? I think you're being unreasonable if you have a go at him for being friends with her, or tell him to stop seeing her, because let's face it you're just another of his exes too. But you can't govern your feelings about this sort of thing, so don't feel too bad about feeling jealous!

Sorry - read your post wrong. I thought it was your current DP who was friends with his ex - in your case, sorry, but you're being unreasonable.

Bloody hell, Elastic woman, she sounds like a proper psycho! 28 years?! Ha, now I feel much more normal, i'm just minorly irked because I'm wondering if he was cheating on me at the time. Not that it matters now, but ya know...

Psycho is right, Boho, and I have no reason to be jealous because she is the very last person on earth dh would want to be with. Talk about bunny boiler.

I'm friends with most of my exes and some of their exes - was a witness at the wedding of one ex 6 months after he and I split up. I lose touch with some people and sometimes they come back - but I can't really envisage being bothered by this sort of thing.

I am still friendly with my ex. We email occasionally and I had lunch with him a few weeks ago before he moved overseas. We split up 16 years ago and have kept in touch (we were together for 4 years). He was an usher at our wedding. Am also still friendly with a few casual shags from way back when. Why not?

DP's ex is godmother to our children, and I am the maid of honour when she gets married this summer.
We have all been part of the same group of friends since early teens, and they were together for a while, but reaised it wouldn't work so split amicably. I have no issues at all, it's the past!