Friend A has anxiety and goes to counselling for this and a few other things. She is massively insecure about her weight as she’s always been overweight and is now obese after 2 dc.
I’ve not seen as much of friend A in the last few months as usual. We usually see each other quite often and meet with friend B as we all have kids the same age. I found out today that friend A is avoiding me. Went for a play date with friend B and she told me friend A needs space from me because I’m making her anxiety and insecurities worse. According to B this has been since we went to a spa for another friends hen recently and I wore a bikini. She felt this was insensitive as we both had kids within a week of each other but she hasn’t shifted her baby weight and I have “bounced back.” Apparantly I know she’s insecure about her body and have made it worse and shown her up in front of everybody as they’ll judge her for not being in good shape.
I’m so upset. I haven’t “bounced back” at all. I’ve (literally) worked my arse off. I’m a very active person anyway and have always been in to running - And I eat relatively healthily. I got a lot of compliments at the hen and people saying you couldn’t even tell if had a baby etc which I know must have been hard for her to hear but she’s actively now trying to distance herself from me because of it.
For context size has never been an issue in our friendship before now and we’ve always been different. We also both had very similar traumatic births with our first babies and she was a fantastic support to me (as I was to her).
I don’t know what to do. Do I just accept that I won’t see her again until she feels she can face me? Or do I talk to her and risk making it worse? Friend B has asked me not to say anything as she wasn’t supposed to tell me. She also told me there’s been a lot of bitching about me from A since the incident which I’m disappointed in. Has anybody else had a situation like this before?