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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

About washing up?

41 replies

MartagonLilies · 20/06/2018 13:29

I hate washing up. We have a tiny kitchen, multiple children of various ages and no dishwasherShock

I'm sick of the washing up. I'm usually quite run down by the time it gets to evening, and so we leave it overnight. DH goes to work, and I quite happily get on with the home stuff. DC / housework / laundry etc.

It's just the bastard washing up. I hate it. Our place would be always tidy if it wasn't for that.

Does anyone else feel the same? How do I stop the ever going cycle of a messy kitchen?

OP posts:
Neverender · 20/06/2018 13:33

If you wash everything as you go, it's easy. Are the kids old enough to wash up their own things/have a rota?

Original poster
MartagonLilies · 20/06/2018 13:35

DC are 5 / 9 / 15, and suffer from a massive case of lazyitus.

OP posts:
Time40 · 20/06/2018 13:37

Do it in little bits, as you go through the kitchen, under five minutes at a time so it doesn't feel so bad. Clean it off and put it in piles of the same thing (all small plates together, all bowls together etc). Put a lot in to soak and wash that lot later - much easier when it's soaked. Have a big jug full of water to put all cutlery and utensils in. If you don't have a double sink, put a washing-up bowl on the side for rinsing water - much easier to dunk stuff than to run it under the tap.

What's your DH doing in the house? If you hate it so much, can't that be his job?

LeighaJ · 20/06/2018 13:39

Yes, I loathe hand washing dishes more than any other chore, I'd rather clean the toilet.

My husband has promised our next place will have a dishwasher. Hoping to move in the next year.

NannyR · 20/06/2018 13:40

Get the kids and DH to do their fair share of the washing up. You're not doing them any favours allowing them to get away with being lazy. If they are happy to use the dishes, they should be happy to wash them too.

daisypond · 20/06/2018 13:40

Can you limit the amount of crockery, etc, you have around? One plate per person, one bowl, one cup, etc,e tc. Anything more is kept in a hard-to-get-at cupboard. So that forces people to wash up and not use endless cups. This worked for us!

LeighaJ · 20/06/2018 13:41

You have a 9 and 15 yo not helping out with dishes?! Take away their favourite toys to inspire them to help. 😏

LeighaJ · 20/06/2018 13:44

What others said, if you don't make your kids do age appropriate chores then you're not doing them any favours.

They'll end up like my husband's younger siblings who still live at homw and at 23 and 20 their Mum and her partner do all their cooking, laundry, and 90% of the tidying up of a quite large house.

Mol1628 · 20/06/2018 13:45

Wash up twice a day. After lunch if you are home and then after tea.
Even if you don’t want to do it. Just do it. That’s the only way to solve it really. Just do it. It’s the leaving it that’s causing the problem. It piles up and then it’s harder to wash because things set.

LeighaJ · 20/06/2018 13:45

*home

MyOtherUsernameisaPun · 20/06/2018 13:49

Washing up is my favourite chore! But I am like you about hoovering so we've made that DH's job 🤗

hazell42 · 20/06/2018 13:49

Dishwasher is a priority. Why haven't you got one.

Original poster
MartagonLilies · 20/06/2018 13:51

You're all right, the older 2 should definitely be helping a bit.
DH does do the washing up sometimes, just I don't always feel I'm being very fair, that he's at work all day and cones home to yesterday's dishes all over the kitchen side.

I'm looking at them now, and it's so depressingly boring. I do sucker it up most of the time, and do them, I've just got to the point where I'm debating how acceptable is to get a cleaner to just come and crack at it for an hour or so. Only half joking.
As a PP sas, I prefer cleaning the toilet and have so today, quite happily

OP posts:
TheRoadLessRocky · 20/06/2018 13:51

The 9 and 15 year old can either do a small load a day eg - all the stuff before dinner, or they can do say two or 3 days a week full load. Eldest washes, youngest dries.

Do a little wash up after lunch (assuming you're a sahm) and then the dinner ones don't seem so bad.

We have a dishwasher now but it was broken for ages and everything piles up so quickly unless we kept on top of it. I hate dishes too as it's a never ending cycle.

Oh and if the kids protest, stop cooking meals for them and tell them to eat toast. They'll think its fun briefly but they'll soon get bored.

ednclouda · 20/06/2018 13:54

the 9 and 15 year old - thats what they are there for No lifts is the washing up done? no ps4 until the washing up is done no mobile phone until the washing up is done mommy is tired DO IT NOW

happymummy12345 · 20/06/2018 13:56

There's loads of household jobs that are way worse than washing up.
I wash as I go, so there's not loads later on. I always wash, dry and put away in one go because I hate leaving washing up draining. What's so bad about it?

LittleMysPonytail · 20/06/2018 13:56

I hate washing up to. We recently got a dishwasher again so that’s helped but I have a few lot of things that have to be handwashed.

I remind myself that it never takes as long as I think it will, make sure anything that is on the side is neatly stacked and either wash, dry or put some away while the kettle is on.

TroubledLichen · 20/06/2018 14:00

Definitely get the kids to help, they should do it after dinner. Make it a non negotiable condition of getting pocket money/being allowed their devices etc. You should do it straight after lunch to keep on top of it. And reuse glasses/coffee mugs throughout the day to reduce the amount. Funky mugs and coloured glasses are great as everyone has theirs and won’t get another from the cupboard.

Aprilshouldhavebeenmyname · 20/06/2018 14:00

I find switching the WiFi off aids chores. My dc put clean dishes away and I /dh wash.

showerflower · 20/06/2018 14:01

We don't have a dishwasher either (we have no room for one) and I felt like this. I now force myself to wash up as soon as the children have finished their dinner, before they go up for their bath and I feel much better for it. My children are too young to wash up unfortunately but I agree with others that at 9 and 15 they should definitely be helping!

littlewoollypervert · 20/06/2018 14:01

Can you play Netflix on a tablet on the windowsill in front of you while washing/drying?
Tabletop dishwasher if you have room?
There was only me and DD when our dishwasher broke, so I had a cupboard with open shelves for a year instead. Then bought a new machine - omg I didn't realise how much I'd missed it! Plus you can hide your dirty dishes in it so the sink stays clear.

BlueBug45 · 20/06/2018 14:02

The 9 and 15 year old should be doing some of the washing up. Even if it takes then 2 hours to do a small amount. Many kids think if they take ages to do a task you will let them off - just ignore them until they finish it.

The 5 year old should be taught to wash up things that don't break and no cutlery so they can't injure themselves. You will then have to re-wash them. Then when they are 7 they will be able to wash most things apart from glasses and sharp knives at a decent speed.

Oysterbabe · 20/06/2018 14:04

I'd make the kids earn their pocket money by doing it.

SilverySurfer · 20/06/2018 14:09

You need to set up a rota for your two eldest to take turns setting table/clearing table/washing up. No screen time or whatever until finished. Even your little one could help with setting the table.

isthismylifenow · 20/06/2018 14:13

When my dw was broken I just left water in the sink as sort of washed as we went during the day. Dc and Dh included.

Yes, the dc should be doing their fair share of the chores, but do keep in mind that although you are a sahm it is not like you are sitting about doing nothing all day with 3 dc. It is ok for your dh to help out too.