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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not sure how to repair damaged relationship with my DS

6 replies

OhCobblers · 19/06/2018 07:00

I grew up with a lot of shouting and was hit as a child. I ALWAYS said I would NOT be that parent. DC ARE 10 and 8. Eldest and I shout at each other and I have smacked in the past which of course I regret immediately and have stopped doing.

He says that all I do is shout - he's miserable - I find him rude and sometimes far too aggressive particularly with his sibling and, like last night, with me too.

I have kept trying to make things right, have consequences etc for bad behaviour. Have tried and tried to keep my temper under control. Why am I angry? I came to the conclusion that actually the children are unintentionally the trigger for taking me back to my sad childhood and rather then be the "soothing balm" for that time in my life actually brings up so many issues that make me angry.

I talked it through Once with a therapist but it didn't help me deal with current problems. Ive called Family Therapy and have an appt on my own first but it's not for a while, But where do I go from here.

I thought I'd be a great mother but it appears to be quite the opposite. I'm not being very coherent - I just feel an utter failure and desperately need to sort this out.

OP posts:
ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 19/06/2018 07:10

You are not your parents. They didn’t care that they shouted and the impact it had on you. I came from a shouty aggressive family and I realised I didn’t have the tools to parent differently. Books like the Explosive Child and Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting helped. Some posters might be able to recommend parenting courses. You need to develop a different skill set and approach as your childhood didn’t equip you to be the parent you want to be. Flowers

usedtoshoutalot · 19/06/2018 07:25

well first stop shouting at them. eldest has your genes so any shouting rows will just escalate and eventually lead to withdrawl and alienation, won't they ?.

you have noted there may be a problem and are beginning to solve it, so what a great start.

i find it hard not to be angry at times but anger is just a feeling, you know? you can feel angry without the feeling taking control of your mouth or limbs, surely? it amazes me that no-one teaches feelings in school and how to feel them.

at some point you mistakenly learned that shouting solves problems. shouting is monkey dancing, two animals squaring off and showing who is bigger with neither actually wanting the seriousness of a fight. once you understand it as primal maybe that will help.

when you feel anger and it triggers your primal responses your human form doesn't have the awareness that shouting is not required in the situation. in fact as you are finding shouting often leads to more problems than it solves.

are you not in fact shouting simply to warn others that you have an angry feeling and are not able to process it properly?

so you need to stop it is teaching the kids a bad coping mechanism.

anger usually hides other feelings. you probably have a lot of unresolved emotions from childhood. it's best to talk with a therapist as they have the training. but it's not a one stop talk it through and it will heal deal. therapy can be about unlocking all the pent up rage, frustration, fear, anger, shame,guilt, embarrasment etc which has accumulated over the years and understanding the dynamics of your family of origin.

by unpicking and understanding the emotional response you have learned you can re-learn a better way of processing emotions. it amazes me they don't teach emotions in school.

try and just feel anger without letting it control you, the feeling will pass.

junebirthdaygirl · 19/06/2018 07:36

When you say you talked it over once with a therapist did you literally mean one time? As it takes a good many therapy sessions to get to the root of that kind of stuff. I had a few years of therapy and didn't have shouty agressive parents but l had still carried issues from my childhood.
Another book..The Chimp Paradox is worth looking at .
Also its helpful l find to decide in your mind and make it known that your love is unconditional and that nothing that boy does will make that change. Grab good moments. Give him regular hugs ..rub on the shoulder..tousle his hair as you go past..just keep the door open between ye. Every night tuck him in and tell him you love him. Tell him about his birth and how you felt..good stuff!! Begin each day afresh and don't carry a grudge..you are the adult.
Exercise together eg boxing for both of ye to get out the anger might help or take up running together. I know a dm and ds doing this lately and it has help to bond them as the ds was very difficult.
But ultimately its intense therapy for you l think.

Babybearsporij · 19/06/2018 07:37

I've noticed myself repeating my parents' mistakes. Emotionally absent, irritable, shouty.... I got this book and it's really helped. I'm really trying and making an effort and things are looking up. I wonder if therapy might help me?

www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00K7ED5S8/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1&tag=mumsnetforum-21

You've done really well to acknowledge the issues OP and well done for taking steps to improve it.

ghostyslovesheets · 19/06/2018 07:48

Stop trying to be perfect - you will fail and that failure feeds your feeling of being shit- so why bother and your kids are making you fail so you get angry with them and it’s a big circular mess

Accept you can’t be perfect - try to be the best mum you can - children model behaviour - if you are shouty and cross when stressed they will be as well - show them a different way - get help and for now - apologise for your behaviour so they know its wrong

ghostyslovesheets · 19/06/2018 07:50

Also google emotional regulation- some good resources out there - learn new ways and again help your kids to do the same - with support

I say this as a former shouty mum who made her kids sad!

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