Help me pretend I'm not socially awkward

[CestLeWhy]

Hi,

We're moving into our first house in SE London soon. What's the done way to introduce yourself to neighbours? I'm a bit socially awkward and I want to get off on the right foot. Should I take over treats?

I'm new to the UK. Back home (Texas) we received home baked treats, custom baked into the shape of our state, with personalised 'Welcome to the Neighbourhood' cars and a care calendar from the neighbours. Our first neighbours in a central London flat responded to my hello with 'Save your breath, love, I won't be living here long'.

So I'm guessing I aim somewhere in between . For information, the houses either side are owned by elderly British couples.

*personalised cards

When we moved into our new house we just kind of waited until we bumped into the new neighbours then did introductions and tried to be friendly. I didn't specifically pop round if you see what I mean.

For your immediate neighbours you could knock the doors and just say "Hi, I'm CestLe Why and I just moved in next door, and thought I'd just come and say Hi."
They will either be friendly and nice or they will be grumpy and uncommunicative.
for other neighbours I'd just wait until you bump into them on the street and smile and "Hi" them.
You could see if there are any local community groups to meet people.
:)

Just wait until you bump into a neighbour, smile and say ‘hi!’

That’s all you need to do.

It would look very out of step to actively go round to a neighbour’s house just to introduce yourself in my experience. Most people don’t socialise with their neighbours and it’d look a bit full on, despite what you’ll read on mumsnet (where everyone is close to their neighbours and they have copies of their keys and regular get togethers)!

well I'm glad you've lowered your expectations! Maybe because people move a lot in uk? Or maybe we're just not as hospitable. Either a quick knock "hi I've moved next door, just thought I'd say hello" or wait til you bump into them.

SE london? dont say anything. ignore them. avoid them. no eye contact.

Sorry I meant London. People tend to move a lot in London.

I've live s here 8 years
I know the lady accords the road as her kids are the same age as mine

I know the lady next door to say hi too

I've no idea who's next door to her but see them gardening.

Sad really

I'd pop round, say 'hi' and introduce yourself. You'll get the vibe as to whether people are friendly or not.

We have keys to all the other houses and regular get togethers, but you have got to work on that It's also much more the done thing outside London imho.

My neighbors moved in a few months ago and put a note through our letterbox saying their names, the house they’d moved into etc and they were looking forward to living here - that was quite nice and meant it was easy to get talking when we finally bumped into each other face to face.

London doesn’t generally do welcome gifts etc

Definitely nothing major like cards, home-baked cakes or other gifts. Simple hello when you see them and if you've not crossed paths within a few days a knock n the door of your immediate neighbours.

God we're so introverted here in the UK

SE london? dont say anything. ignore them. avoid them. no eye contact.

yep thats how it is in my area! SE london isnt known for being particularly friendly. just say hello if you see them. my neighbours have never even acknowledged me.

Londoner here, to be honest I wouldn’t necessarily trust your ‘treats’. Not because I think you’ve poisoned them, but because I don’t know what your hygiene habits in the kitchen are like, or if your food is vegetarian (some people may have other dietary requirements or allergies etc). So I would leave the food aspect unless it’s prepacked from a shop.

Just in passing smile and say ‘hi, I’ve just moved in’ and take it from there.

definitely dont send treats or gifts its not the norm at all.

Also I don’t think moving into a new house is really an occasion to give cards/gifts to your neighbours really.

Thank god I asked!

I don't think the Southerner in me will allow me to just move in without saying a word but yes, it's a slightly 'intimidating' area so maybe I'll just lurk outside enough to see neighbours, then introduce myself

I live in SE London and we are very friendly - but a wave and a yoo-hoo as and when you see people. Let it develop from there.

I knocked on my (elderly) neighbour's door, and introduced myself. I go in for a chat every couple of months and check on her when the weather is bad. She buys lovely birthday and Christmas presents for my DCs, and takes in parcels for us. We've lived here more than 10y now.

We are in a big city, not London though.

Life is too short not to be yourself. There nothing wrong with introducing yourself to test the water.

Well why go with the norm? I bet most people would really appreciate an introduction. Especially if you have an accent so people can tell that it's obviously the done thing in states. And less likely to think you're nosy/a pervert/a robber casing the joint.

Actually when I moved to my flat here in North London there were a lot of kids playing out so introduced myself to one of the parents. I think it's easier with kids because straight away we were talking about the local schools etc.

God Londoners are a miserable bunch. I've moved recently (big city). Know my new neighbours by name, went and said hello when they were in the street or their gardens. Baked cakes with the kids and took 'em round. Figured it'd do no harm and that if they knew me and the kids they'd also look out for my youngest (who is just old enough to go to the shops for the first time on his own). I don't want to be best mates but I do want to know my own community - turns out they do, too. Start as you mean to go on. Or move up north, where a friendly chat isn't greeted with such tiresome suspicion