To want to strangle my ungrateful neighbour

[FairyFace]

Seriously I'm so fucking pissed off, last year, a neighbour and who I would have called a friend was going through a hard time, her husband was away working in another country and money always seemed tight with her, she was talking about having a party for her kids and renting a bouncey castle, my dh had bought one, a proper one for our kids rather than shelling out every year, so I offered to loan her ours rather than have her waste 200quid, she was delighted and asked me if my dh could drop it to her house, we live about a mile away, dh suffers really bad with his back so this was a pain in the ass for him to have to do, no mention of her brother or father coming to pick it up, they all have big enough transport etc, but I let it slide and just said look we are helping her out bla bla.

She got the castle, all went grand at party, 3 months later she still had the castle on her concrete and was driving her car over it to get out her gate. Raining on it , dogs pissing on it etc, her husband was home in the mean time so my dh had said well surely her dh will drop it back now that he is home, no, he fecked off again and left it on the ground, eventually my dh got sick of it and went down and took it up, by himself with not an ounce of help from any of her family. The weight of the thing is unnatural. I didn't say anything just silently fumed. This year I set it up for my own childs birthday and Im fucking livid it is filthy, sweets, cake etc still in it from last year. She actually started to distance herself from me after I loaned her the castle, I really don't know why I have always enjoyed her company and helped her through some tough times, which sort of made me sad but I suppose some people just move on. How are some people so ungrateful? She didn't even say thank you after we collected the castle.

Sorry I just wanted to rant, I know I should have pulled her up on it, but I was saying to myself I won't let that happen again and now that we don't see each other anymore I won't get the chance haha.

Some people have no respect whatsoever for other peoples things . It galls me as I am always willing to lend to friends and family or help out and then it takes one person to shit on you to put you off.

The amount of clothes etc I gave her for her youngest child and never so much as got a thank you from her, and then she just goes and stops contact. Neck of it!

She sounds awful. I also can't believe you left the castle there for all those months instead of picking it up when you knew she was driving on it but don't blame you for being annoyed, she sounds very selfish and rude

Why did you wait so long? I would have been round after 3 days, not months. Ah well, at least she's shown her true colours now.

It was more out of spite to see how long she would let it there, but silly of me in the end, she didn't have any shame at all, when ever we would rent bouncy castles I'd always make sure they were given to me in the same way I received them! Sorry I just needed a rant after seeing the state of it again, luckily there was no tears in it

how is she a neighbour if she lives a mile away? maybe she assumed you gave it to her? doesnt mention you asking for it back? just waiting for her to bring it back. was it clear it was a loan?

Just distance yourself and move on. You must be livid, I would be. I would probably send her a text, to get it off my chest, but I'm just a coward who doesn't like confrontation!

I’m guessing they’re somewhere rural? Not many people would have room for a full size bouncy castle.

At least you won’t be doing anything else for her. Cheeky cow.

Sorry we are living in the countryside so she is the next house closest to me, no it was defo a loan, I had only just bought it and had told her why I had bought it etc to save on paying out every year for castles for parties. I had left it initially as I thought her dh would bring it back and didn't ask for it immediately as her kids were playing on it for the remainder of the week after the party.

Was also going to ask how she was a neighbour if she lives over a mile away. Sorry misses point of thread.
However you’ve got it back now and thankfully there’s no tears in it.
Never a borrower or a lender be springs to mind.

She sounds awful. Wash her away and don't bother with her again. She is totally ungrateful and absolutely disgusting leaving it outside on a driveway!

You missed all the red flags there.

People on a tight budget who aren't CFs don't go on and on about wanting a bouncy castle for a birthday party. They just quietly organise a birthday tea with jelly and cake at home.

Similarly non-CF people would fall over themselves to collect it from you themselves. That's why you make them go to the hassle not you: it weeds out the cheeky fuckers.

You'll know for next time a CF approaches you.

did you not ask when she would be dropping it back??

The old adage "neither a borrower nor a lender be" is one you should apply to your life, OP.

Rarely does someone treat other people's stuff as they would treat their own. In this case if she had treated a rented bouncy castle in the same manner she would have been charged extra.

You were foolish to leave it there for three months though and I can't understand why you did.

She's gone quiet cos she knows she's took the piss. She's had what she's needed not has fucked off.
You don't need her as a friend. When I borrow stuff I'm terrified of ruining it.
Driving over it is a totally disrespectful thing to do.

some people are a disgrace, but she is the one losing out on the friendship - you seem to be so nice, generous and helpful, she no longer can ask you for anything.

Expensive lesson learnt for you, you could send her an invoice for the cleaning, but that wouldn't get you anywhere. Just ignore her from now on. She is only distancing herself because she is embarrassed! Give her some time and she'll come back, just don't make the same mistake again.

I'd be letting her know in no uncertain terms... how selfish and ungrateful she is...cheeky cow

If she's been driving over it I'm amazed it's not ruined!

Outrageous CF behaviour. Definitely don't lend anything to them again as they don't treat your belongings respectfully, return them promptly nor say thankyou.

However I agree with PP why did you leave the bouncy castle there for months? I too would have been asking for it back within 2 days. I hope it's not ruined.

Especially outrageous from a rural neighbour where you're implicitly expected to look out for each other. If there are criminals eyeing up her land or any emergencies there I'd just keep the door shut and tell her to piss off in future

Dh and I had “friends” who were serious piss takers. We’d always had parties outside in the summer. But had our last one in winter indoors. Some of them smoked inside, flicked fag ash on the floor despite there being several ashtrays and even stubbed out a couple of cigarettes directly on the floor - tiles at least. Spent condom in the bathroom bin not even wrapped - from a ons, the bloke was living with partner and their kids. She stayed at home while he had a shag at mine 🤢. I could go on. Some people are just vile vile vile.

You sound a bit like me op. I’ve been and to a certain extent still am too nice for my own good. I’d never have someone taking the piss out of me like that again though! I hope you’ve finally learnt your lesson.

She may have been put out if you seemed reluctant to drive the bouncy castle over. Some people really do burn bridges at the slightest sign that someone isn't pleased with them.