To find it impossible to make mum friends?

[Someonehelpmi]

I recently had to move back home to my family hometown after a very messy break up. I'm a young first time mum and out of the few of my friends who do still live here none of them have children and are very career orientated. I can't really rant or talk about motherhood and the ups and downs as they probably just get fed up. I've tried so many mum and baby groups but they are all really cliquey and find it hard to integrate when everyone already have their own friends and don't make an effort . At the moment it feels like my only friends are my mum and my little boy, I really want to get out there and make some new friends and do more but just keeping hirrinf dead ends. It's so lonely

I think as an adult it can seem really hard to make friends but it's worth remembering that with the friends you had as children you probably saw them every day or every week, over and over and over and that's what built the friendship. You can't expect friendship to just spring out of seeing a person a couple of times - it takes quite a long time and quite a lot of persistence.

Sorry for all the typos

If you’re baby is still tiny, why not get in contact with your local NCT branch - our run coffee mornings and walks for exactly this reason... keep with it because you will start to naturally gravitate to a couple of like minded people and will gradually build up friendships. Also get on the local mum FB pages as there is often lots of information on there - baby groups (rather than classes) can also be useful especially if they are drop in - you will often find both groups of people and individuals, if you make a bit of effort and say hello, this often makes a big difference!

I am a lot happier since I have up trying to make mum friends! Do you have some good old friends you can see or chat to on the phone op? I've decided to focus on the friendships I already have, even if they are 100s of miles away, as I find mum and baby groups so depressing and my self esteem couldn't take any more rejection!!

I'm not far from you, are you on the Mush app? It's a great tool for meetups, there's a few planned in Newport/Caerphilly/Cwmbran coming up.

@Mouikey thank you that's helpful! Ill look into it, it's all a bit daunting

@qumquat I don't want to give up just yet! I do have a few good friends that I speak to but also just want a few people to do things with or talk to that have children so they can play with each other while we chat etc

@WTFdidwedo, I am now I have just downloaded it after people responding on this thread I went to one in Chepstow today as I'm more towards that side of Newport x

Ah that's good news! I don't bother with them at the moment as I have two under 2 and getting out the door is currently a nightmare but I may well see you in the future!

Have you tried Mush? It’s a bit like match.com for mums, allows you to upload a profile & look for others nearby. Plus they often do organised meet ups. Good luck OP, it’s miserable feeling lonely