Diamond ring missing from home - AIBU to suspect cleaner?

[Mymadworld]

For background I wear a plain wedding band day-to-day and keep my eternity ring & diamond engagement ring in the same box and wear them together when I'm going out. Never in the day and never separately. I've just gone to put my rings on as I'm going out tonight and my engagement ring is missing. It was over 2 weeks ago that I last went out so assuming it haven't worn my rings since.

I'm generally quite a trusting person but I've only been using this cleaning agency a few months and have had a really bad experience (1 no show, 1 unreliable and the last one utterly crap at cleaning!) and I just don't lose stuff. I literally cannot remember the last time I lost something and I feel really bad that my first instinct was to blame the last cleaner as whilst she was rubbish at cleaning I had no reason to distrust her. I've searched bags, under the dresser, in the vac bags etc but nothing and feeling it's a bit of a fruitless search anyway!
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I do of course have no proof whatsoever that this last cleaner has done anything wrong so loathe to blame her but likewise if she did pinch it, she would get away with it if I don't say anything.

What would you do in this situation? And if I don't blame the cleaner (as whilst I'm 99% sure I haven't lost it I wouldn't put my life on the line over it!) I presumably don't need to contact the police so would my insurers pay out?

First of all ask everyone you live with whether they did anything with or move the ring.

Only when you have asked them especially children suspect the cleaner.

Checked with all of them Dc (boys 9+ looked at me as if I was mad - definitely not there sort of thing) and DH no idea

There is literally nothing you can do, is there? If the cleaner, a stranger in your house, stole your ring, she is not going to admit it and you can't prove it.

Putting away genuine valuables in a safe or lockable cupboard in the future could make sense.

We have a safe but don't really use it unless we're gong on holiday, live in a safe area and don't like to live in fear so probably too trusting and carefree. Will of course use the safe in future but it's made me reconsider letting strangers into my home

Well, there's always a small chance someone isn't honest.

There's not a lot you can do, is there?

If you're 90% sure you didn't lose it and nobody else could have taken it, I'd quietly ask the cleaning service for a new cleaner and say that 'though there's not proof so you aren't making a direct accusation, a valuable piece of jewellery has gone missing from your home and you thought it appropriate to flag it with them in case similar things have happened / happen in the future'.

You can usually still claim with contents insurance for lost jewellery without a police report...

An agency carer stole my MIL's jewellery.
The cleaner in their sheltered housing complex was sacked because she was stealing from the residents.
It happens.
You can't really be sure how well references are checked.
My house needs a jolly good clean (I am disabled) but I have had so many bad experiences I daren't even try to find a cleaner.
Is your ring insured?

Search your bag that you used last time you wore it, tip it out completely, check the pockets of everything you wore.

Search the room where its kept, in the dark, with a torch, and get onto your hands and knees and check every nook and corner.

If it's kept in a box, knock the box from where it's usually kept and see where it lands, the cleaner may have knocked it cleaning and didn't realise there were two rings in the same box and picked it up, seen that a ring was in it and thought nothing more of it.

Good luck 🤞

You don't have an anniversary or birthday or anything coming up soon do you? If your husband is having something done to the ring for you he might lie about not knowing where it is.

If it was stolen it's odd that they only stole the engagement ring and not the eternity band as well.

Why not ask the cleaner to keep an eye out for it, say you've lost it, tell her you need to pull the house apart to look for it and ask her to help.

No accusations and she gets a chance to return it if she has taken it.

Don't stop looking, it's just as likely that you've put it somewhere without realising

Might be worth reporting to the police. In the (admitted unlikely) event that they recover a whole load of stolen property there is a chance it may get returned to you.

The box is has a fairly stiff hinged lidded so even if it were knocked over the lid wouldn't fly off but will pull out drawers in case.

There is always a chance I've lost it but I can't imagine going to put my rings away and not registering then that one was missing. I don't sleep in them as my eternity ring whilst lovely, isn't very comfortable and I have to remove my engagement ring first. I think it doesn't help that I'm a real creature of habit and simply can't see a situation any other way without alarm bells ringing.
I've already sacked the cleaner (day after the crap clean) so she won't be coming back nor can I recruit her to 'help'.

Talk to your insurers. They usually give good advice IME.