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AIBU?

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Original poster

A Sex Question

15 replies

TriedToLikeOlives · 13/06/2018 00:19

I’ve been with my partner for about 3 years.

I was married for 25 years previously do I have limited experience ( I’m 47).

Current DP only ever finishes the deed inside me 2/10.

I really don’t know if I’m being unreasonable in feeling pissed off about this (I am) or not

OP posts:
itsbetterthanabox · 13/06/2018 00:22

Do you mean he doesn't finish at all? Or he pulls out?

letsallhaveanap · 13/06/2018 00:23

it depends on why you are pissed off about it?
Is it because you are unsatisfied by the sex itself or is it because you feel like he 'should' come inside you?

Original poster
TriedToLikeOlives · 13/06/2018 00:26

He ‘ finishes ‘ on a part of my body but only after a few minutes of wanking so not ‘i’m Coming’ & then pull out. IYSWIM

OP posts:
Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 13/06/2018 00:28

Was with a guy like this a while back. It annoyed me too as wasn't what I was used to and knocked my confidence a little.
He had erection problems though and could only perform occasionally. I later found out it was partly why he and his wife had divorced. I felt he should have told me before starting something with me and transferring the problem onto me. We didn't last as I was only 26 at the time and wanted an active sex life. He was 40s which may have been significant, I'm not sure.

Medea13 · 13/06/2018 00:29

If you don't like it, tell him???

Whatshallidonowpeople · 13/06/2018 00:30

I don't understand the problem

letsallhaveanap · 13/06/2018 00:32

have you spoken to him like at the time asking him to finish inside you? Perhaps hes just more turned on by the visual aspect of coming on a part of your body? But if he is coming inside you sometimes then it doesnt seem that he is not turned on by coming inside you... just perhaps that he likes coming -on- you a bit more..... so I assume if you expressed that youd prefer if he came inside you, he might be able to do that more often for you.....

Have you spoken to him about it?

2good · 13/06/2018 00:35

Some men find it hard to get the right level of 'friction' inside to be able to come, so they need to use their hand which let's face it most of them have been practising their whole lives. Are you able to come during penetration? A lot of women can only come during clitoral stimulation so in a way it's similar and I don't think he can really do much about it.

JavaJava · 13/06/2018 00:41

What bothers you more? That he needs to use his hand or that he is finishing on your body? Does your emotion feel more like being offended or like a knock of confidence?

PerfectlyDone · 13/06/2018 00:43

It bothers you.

That is enough justification to speak to him about it.

Italiangreyhound · 13/06/2018 00:43

I'd talk to him about it. Very nicely and gently. If you don't like it then I think you need to tell him or he may assume you are fine with it.

steff13 · 13/06/2018 00:45

I'd talk to him about it. I wouldn't like it either. It sort of ruins the moment.

PurpleRobe · 27/06/2018 22:36

Did you talk to him @TriedToLikeOlives?

DroningOn · 27/06/2018 22:51

Few mins wanking then finishing on you sounds like a big turn off. Definitely talk to him and find out what does work for him. More openness / less worry about what the other may think = more fulfilment in the long term. Good luck

vampirethriller · 27/06/2018 22:55

I had a boyfriend who did that, it was because he'd watched porn since he was a young teen and thought that was how everyone did it.

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