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AIBU?

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Original poster

Woman on crutches getting off train - who was in the right?

62 replies

witchofzog · 12/06/2018 17:55

I am on an extremely busy rush hour train. So busy that people are standing and you often literally have to fight your way on.

The train pulled in and there are scores of people trying to get on. I am opposite a door as it pulls in (One of only 3 doors as we have crappy trains here) There is a lady on crutches who wants to get off the train and she says she has booked assistance and a ramp. She waits for everyone to get off but then blocks the door and says she is not moving until the ramp arrives. A guy says that is fine but asks if we can walk round her to get on ourselves as the train is filling up and there are probably 25 to 30 people waiting to get through that door at least but she refuses again and blocks the door until the ramp arrives a minute or so later. The guy is visibly cross but doesn't say anything else.

So who was wrong? Should the lady have let people on? There were just as many people getting off as getting on. Or was she in the right for refusing to move? The doors could not have closed as she was leaning out of them and the conductor always checks the train before signalling it can move off. Or was she in the right to worry about being missed in the crowd?

OP posts:
AlexanderHamilton · 12/06/2018 17:56

She was in the wrong. It’s etiquette to key people off first but in that circumstance of waiting for the ramp she was wrong.

KittyVonCatsworth · 12/06/2018 17:57

She was maybe concerned that she would have been knocked accidentally and wouldn’t be able to steady herself. As without most things, it’s the delivery of the statement rather than the intent, IYSWIM N

LARLARLAND · 12/06/2018 17:58

She was right because had she moved she may have not been able to get back to the door quickly or easily.

Whatshallidonowpeople · 12/06/2018 17:58

I'd guess she has been left a few times before so had to make sure

IWannaSeeHowItEnds · 12/06/2018 17:58

I guess she thought that if she m9ved to let people on, the doies could close and the train move off with her still on board. If she ore booked assistance, then it ought to have been ready on the platform whrn the train pulled in. I can see why it would piss off everybody else though, but my sympathy is more with her - public tramsport while on crutches must be a total nightmare.

AnyFucker · 12/06/2018 17:59

Have you ever used crutches ? You are terrifyingly vulnerable when doing so.

She was right (and I applaud her ballsiness) to do what she did.

scaredofthecity · 12/06/2018 18:00

I've been on crutches on a train and it is hell. Maybe she was worried about being pushed back inside and missing her stop.
Some people can be complete arseholes even though your quite obviously disabled. I'm betting she's had a previous bad experience which has made her act the way she did.

WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 12/06/2018 18:00

I suspect she was worried that a flood of people rushing past her to get on the train could easily knock and destabilise or possibly really hurt her.

I don’t see why the people waiting to get on couldn’t wait? Were they worried that people getting on another door would fill up the carriage nearest to the lady on crutches?

longlostpal · 12/06/2018 18:00

I expect she was worried about being blocked in, or maybe her legs hurt and she didn’t want to move. If there wasn’t enough room for others to go past her I guess she would have had to go backwards in order for others to go on. I don’t think it was wrong for someone to have asked to go past but it was also ok for her to have refused.

ferrier · 12/06/2018 18:01

Maybe she should just have accepted some help to get off the train rather than waiting for ramp.

PolkaHots · 12/06/2018 18:01

She was in the right... everybody piles on, she gets shoved back, doors close before she has time to move forward to the door again, train moves off.

Original poster
witchofzog · 12/06/2018 18:01

I don't know if it makes a difference but it's a station where the train has to move back out in the same direction initially so it tends to wait a while there, and there was enough room for her to still be by the doors AND let people on, but she looked a bit anxious too

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 12/06/2018 18:02

Why is this an issue to you ?

AdaColeman · 12/06/2018 18:02

The lady with crutches was right to wait in clear view for the assistance and ramp to arrive.
The fit and agile passengers could have walked to another door to board the train.

The rail assistance should have been on time though!

Original poster
witchofzog · 12/06/2018 18:03

I have been on crutches yes. People are arseholes on public transport sometimes.

OP posts:
WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 12/06/2018 18:04

Yeah if the train was that busy, if she let people in she’d probably have been pushed out from the inside.

Ultimately it’s custom to allow people to get off before people getting on so she was in the right. But I don’t blame the man for being a bit frustrated either, at least everyone respected what she requested and went with it.

Original poster
witchofzog · 12/06/2018 18:04

I didn't say it was an issue for me. I am genuinely interested in peoples opinions because this is y'know, a discussion forum Hmm

OP posts:
Sleepyblueocean · 12/06/2018 18:05

She would have been worried about being left on or knocked over. Those who were that bothered about waiting could have moved to another door.

dogzdinner · 12/06/2018 18:07

You always let people off first before getting on.

Why couldn't they have just got on another carriage?

Dungeondragon15 · 12/06/2018 18:08

Having been on a train with crutches, I don't really blame her. She was probably just trying to make sure she got off the train. This is most likely to happen if there is a crowd of people waiting to get on. She also wouldn't want to be pushed by 25 or 30 people trying to get on. If you are using crutches you may not want to rely on the fact that that the doors "shouldn't" close if you are leaning out of them. If they did start to close she might fall.
Anyway, if people were really desperate to get on they could just use a different door couldn't they?

Original poster
witchofzog · 12/06/2018 18:09

Probably because by moving to another set of doors you are definitely 100 percent not going to get a seat. It's a crap hourly service and it's hideously over crowded. Most people were ok. Some looked decidedly stroppy

OP posts:
LunaTrap · 12/06/2018 18:11

She was right. If the train wasn't going anywhere for a while nothing to stop the other passengers waiting or walking to another door is there.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 12/06/2018 18:12

She was right, she could easily have been knocked down by 25 to 30 people pushing past her in a narrow train corridor. She also ran the risk of the doors closing before her assistance arrived had she not stayed there to block them.

Why couldn't any if the people on the platform have walked to the next door and boarded the train there if they could not wait to let a disabled person alight?

MatildaTheCat · 12/06/2018 18:12

If you have a disability, even using a stick, it’s bloody terrifying getting on and off trains, especially in rush hour when it’s every man for himself. She was assertive because she has probably got experience of the railways and the major dangers we face if we can’t hop on and off or skip out of the doors just as they close.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 12/06/2018 18:15

Sorry, x posted op

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