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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Returned home to find neighbour in my garden

215 replies

OyO · 11/06/2018 11:56

I don’t know what to think about this.

I’m supposed to be at work all day, as normal. Came home early with some kind of sickness bug to find my neighbour standing in my garden chopping away at a hedge.

I was completely startled and said ‘hello? Can I help you?’ To which she responded: ‘well you were never going to cut it’ and brazenly carried on. I asked her to get out of my garden, she took her time and then climbed a ladder to go over the fence and back to her side. She’s now leaning over the hedge into my garden and still trimming it.

I’m at a loss. She’s so brazen I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable in thinking she’s cheeky or not.

We have a 6ft fence separating us half way then a 5ft hedge. The hedge belongs to her and sits on her boundary. It’s an unruly hedge which overhangs into our garden and has done for the last 3 years (since we moved in). Our cat lounges under the overhang as it offers shelter and we have a family of dunnocks that live in the actual hedge. They’ve been there for years and we feed them daily plus have a bird bath for them.

The cat is now terrified hiding indoors right now and the dunnock nest has clearly been disturbed due to how far back she’s cut the hedge.

It’s a private garden. She’s in her 70s and doesn’t speak to anyone except to police their gardens. She once collected up all of the blossom from her front garden that had fallen from someone’s tree and dumped it on their drive (it blew back again Confused).

She’s right, I was never going to cut it back because I didn’t want it cutting back. Is she allowed to do this?

I’m also worried that she may pop into the garden whenever she feels like because she really didn’t seem to fussed about me catching her.

OP posts:
ElspethTascioni · 11/06/2018 22:18

I totally accept she’s in the wrong, but I feel a little bit sorry for her because it’s crap when your neighbours leave their gardens a mess as my neighbours know from me

TemptressofWaikiki · 11/06/2018 22:23

Wow OP, you are more patient than me. I'd have switched my jet washer on and chased that bitch out of my garden. I have a wild meadow at the back, plus a camomile lawn and let my bushes really overhang to give shelter to wildlife. There are loads of bees, butterflies and lovely eco system going. A while back a neighbour whose garden was backing on to mine tried to moan that our garden looked too wild. Since, she had to climb on a ladder and crane her neck to actually see in, I told her to mind her own business. I tended to accidentally switch on a hose whenever I noticed her trying to snoop. She has stopped all of that now. You gotta set boundaries even if it involves high velocity water jets… Grin

Cheshire1973 · 11/06/2018 22:24

OP, I do sympathise. Well done for confronting her. I know how bad it came make you feel, we've had similar and I'm no push over, but still, its horrible. A neighbour came into our garden to cut down a tree (I know, unbelievable - as we are tenants apparently it didn’t matter, long story and yes, I now wish I had started a thread about it!). When asked to stop and leave, he didn’t leave straight away either.

Came back a few days later to find tree gone and a right dodgy sort packing up and bunking over fence – neighbour had paid some cowboy to finish it off. When I challenged dodgy builder type, he got very nasty very quickly but scooted away before I could do anything. DP and I were then both very ill with Swine flu so had to just let it go. BIG mistake. He now thinks he can just totally disregard us.

They are having major building work done and haven’t had the basic good manners to tell us properly, what is going on. Came round last night to vaguely mention something happening this week. Came home today to find scaffolders have been in to garden, using our garden furniture to climb over fence. Nice. Normally I would be fine about a bit of scaffolding in our garden and blocking half our bedroom window, no problem at all, but it’s the total lack of basic manners that piss us off so much. We are worried what’s coming next. We will deal with them this time though.

OyO · 11/06/2018 22:33

That’s perfect, Glaciferous. I will get some. I’ll ask at my local garden centre for some heavy duty, wide spreading weeds too. I’ll invest in a hose and some sprinklers too, double drench the bitch!

Elspeth you’re far too kind. My garden is very tidy but for the overhanging hedge which is left that way for a reason. She’s a control freak.

Shock at cutting your tree and using your garden, Cheshire. People are unbelievable sometimes. Good luck with it all and definitely don’t put up with anymore. Like you say, they take normal people not wanting to waste time on pointless confrontation as a go ahead to do as they please.

OP posts:
OyO · 11/06/2018 22:34

I’ve ordered this to hang on the line, facing towards her of course Smile

Returned home to find neighbour in my garden
OP posts:
Puzzledandpissedoff · 11/06/2018 22:42

An utterly appropriate garden ornament to face her way, I'd say Grin

Pity you can't still get sodium chlorate ... with some of that mixed and put in a super soaker type pistol you could have had a LOT of fun Wink

Avonandice · 11/06/2018 22:51

Russian vines are a nice plant, will grow and cover the bare bits quite quickly.

I have a love/hate relationship with the one at my mothers.I hack it back it grows back bigger than when I chopped it. Left it for a month once, lost the shed she has in the garden.

Puffycat · 11/06/2018 22:53

I’m impressed she’s climbing a ladder 😉

Tistheseason17 · 11/06/2018 22:56

Gotta love a CFN thread... Grin

Melamin · 11/06/2018 22:56

Pyracantha. The whole boundary. Or berberis or rosa rugosa (good for birds of the feathered variety)

Allgirlskidsanddogs · 11/06/2018 22:56

There is some anti burglar paint that doesn’t dry, maybe use it on the fence where she climbs over?

GrabbyMcGrabby · 11/06/2018 22:57

I would be raging if I were you OP, and definitely looking for revenge and/or preventative measures. However, can I be boring for a sec and urge caution about hosing her etc. I know someone who ended up with a police caution for throwing a bucket of water over someone, and they were both on their own property at the same time. The automatic fox deterrents which spray water should be fine.

Loving the hanging witch. Have friends who specially bought offensive t shirts and nasty looking, big pants to hang on the washing line when their cunty neighbour said looking at their washing upset her in the mornings when she opened the curtains. Lots more to both those stories too. Some terrible behaviour from neighbours it seems these days. Also, sadly, over stretched police resources mean you are unlikely to get help unless she is violent. When are you installing CCTV?

Oldraver · 11/06/2018 22:58

Thanks Glaciferous...I was looking for some ground cover...that will do nicely

ohtheholidays · 11/06/2018 22:59

Get hold of some dandelion seeds and scatter them over next doors garden it will piss her of when they keep popping up in her garden just like she's pissed you off by popping into your garden Grin

condepetie · 11/06/2018 23:04

I would be absolutely raging.

Please stand up to her OP - not just over the fence, or with the witchy ornaments, but go and speak to her face to face - or at least put a note through the door. She can't walk all over you like that.

DandelionAndBedrock · 11/06/2018 23:22

This is bonkers!

Just going to leave these here for you, OP...

Glaciferous · 11/06/2018 23:40

You see how it says 'not overly invasive' on the link. That is a lie. It will spread and spread and grow and grow and take over everything.

I've been trying to keep one plant in check for years. I'm not winning.

Mummyoflittledragon · 12/06/2018 06:29

Cheshire1973
If you don’t feel able to talk to the neighbours, talk to your letting agent or landlord. This behaviour isn’t acceptable. This is trespass and the scaffolding needs to be removed now. You need to tell them anyway. As a tenant, if the property is damaged, you will be blamed.

MachineBee · 12/06/2018 07:38

Love the weed bombs Dandelion!

OyO · 12/06/2018 11:46

Grin thank you for all of the plant suggestions, I think I might spend the entire weekend ‘gardening’ with some music on - Slipknot, of course. I LOVE the weed bombs, they will make me feel so much better! Every time she annoys me I’ll just wait for darkness and chuck one over Grin

I’m home again today, she seems to be busying herself with a new drama involving the front garden and another neighbour’s fence. I’m wondering if she might have some guests due and so is trying to get everything immaculate. Or maybe she’s selling, that would be amazing!

I’ve been thinking of investing in some sort of cctv to check on the cat while I’m at work so will get another to face the garden too.

The dunnocks are back today but no longer have any hedge to go into as it’s so bare Sad so they’re making do with sitting on the shed. I’ve tried to rebuild the hedge to offer some shelter, have also put out some straw and cat fur from his brush for building materials. Hopefully they can rebuild without Gardenzilla destroying it again.

OP posts:
TheMaddHugger · 12/06/2018 11:54

wondering if you can get a free standing 'nest box' for them ?

www.theguardian.com/environment/2007/feb/16/conservationandendangeredspecies.wildlife

wictional · 12/06/2018 13:34

Gardenzilla Grin

DarlingNikita · 12/06/2018 17:22

The dunnocks are back today but no longer have any hedge to go into as it’s so bare sad so they’re making do with sitting on the shed. I’ve tried to rebuild the hedge to offer some shelter, have also put out some straw and cat fur from his brush for building materials.

You're really kind. She's a loon and unpleasant.

0lapislazuli · 12/06/2018 17:47

Poor dunnocks. Can you get some bird roosts?

Dillydallyer · 12/06/2018 17:48

101 is not for trespass. The police don’t deal with trespass, a solicitor would.