To ask how you became a "strong" woman?

[LiteraryDevil1]

I've been musing for a while now as I read thread after thread from women who are enabling their husband/partner/boyfriend to be a selfish, thoughtless, disorganised, pathetic manchild. There are so many women on here who know their own worth, have great self respect, great dignity, independence, confidence etc and have no trouble in maintaining firm boundaries with other people. I see so many women helping others to get rid of partners that are no good for them and I think it's amazing how they come across. How did you get to be that strong, independent woman who's not afraid to stand up for herself?

My family. Parents because they're both from abusive families so have overcome a lot to give me a secure base. Between them they're a great mix of fighting for what you want, knowing what you deserve and being brave enough to take a leap to get it (they moved in together when quite young and together built up a good business and lots of friendships). They're both open to learning new ways of doing things.

Even though it took 2 of them to make their life and neither of them would change it, they both acknowledged when I was growing up that financially they couldn't have split up and both had nice lives so they've instilled in me how important it is to be able to walk away and be on my own if I need to.

Other members of the family have made me strong because I learned young that 'family' isn't the same as 'entitled to know you.' I've had to cut some people out which has been hard but has toughened me up a lot.

Me ex made me strong because he was physically violent and when he pushed me to breaking point and I physically fought back, I realised I am physically and mentally strong enough to leave him and be ok.

I also think I am quite strong willed - just part of my personality which can make me a bit of a pain in the arse at times, but also means that I set high standards for the people I spend time with. The bit I've had to work on is being realistic with those standards but I'm happy with the way I am now.

My XH broke me, completely and utterly. I was a shell when I got away from him with DS1.

I spent nearly 4 years on my own, putting myself back together and learning how to be me again.