To be disappointed co sleeping doesn’t work?

[Whatissleeping]

Inspired by co sleeping thread below... has anyone found this doesn’t help their baby?

Eventually I tried this week as baby wakes at least hourly. I thought it would be lovely and a huge relief after struggling with separate basket etc. Sadly baby wasn’t reading the forum as not any happier on the bed! Still cried, wouldn’t settle and once asleep woke as much. Harder to settle without rocking being an option. Odd because loves cuddles when picked up.

What am I doing wrong?!

I don't think your doing anything wrong. How old is your baby?
Two of mine hated co-sleeping, any kind of swaddling, cuddling or rocking to sleep and slings, all the things newborns are meant to be soothed by! Although the other two slept well next to me I found I was so concious of them being there I didn't properly sleep so was more knackered than with the frequent waking.

Babies are utterly confounding. My first son hated co-sleeping and broke out of his swaddle on his first night. He woke up all through the night for years no matter what we did.

DS2 is now 4 months. Loved co-sleeping, loves his swaddle and has been sleeping through the majority of the time for about 6 weeks.

They decide what they like and they sure as hell let you know about it!

For years! Been up every 30-45 mins tonight

Three months so we’ve the four month sleep regression to come but I can’t see that it can regress anymore! Always been this way really

Some kids are just shit sleepers regardless of what you do. I'm currently sat up with 18 month old DS who's having an 18 month sleep regression, up for three hours a night, every night for two weeks so far.

Three months is a tricky one, they're basically just out of the womb and adjusting, I'd suggest persevering with cosleeping if it's something you want to do, it did work slightly for us, especially in the early days. But solidarity, it's hard.

Nothing.

Depends on the child. I had one who never slept alone, only on me and one who wouldn't settle on me but happily in their cot. That one also hated the sling, whereas the other lived in it. Personality, not you!

That’s a shame... I was hoping there might be a magical baby password I was missing to unlock peaceful cosleeping! 🙈

Have you tried music? We used this

Or a cd of white noise? Or record yourself reading a story? Sleep on baby's sheet for a couple of nights before putting it on the cot. Sleep with your arm through the bars of the cot?

Music and white noise yes (and the white noise does help to settle just not maintain sleep, the music I find therapeutic if nothing else 😊). Not recorded us speaking, that would be funny but worth a try!

Slept with sleeping bag before use and slept holding her little hand in the basket by the bed, all very nice but sadly ineffective. Sometimes the patting or hand hold does get her back to sleep quite quickly

cosleeping worked for us as long as I BF on demand as soon as they stirred. Just being in the same bed didn’t mean they woke much less, just that I didn’t have to get up every two hours! Just mentioning it as cosleeping and lots of nighttime nursing often go hand in hand.

Is it being laid flat? Mine liked co sleeping but because couldn't raise him up like could in basket he needed more winding. I've never found it decreases wake ups but I fed laying down and dozed whilst he fed so it was easier to drift off to sleep when he finished his umpteenth feed of the night!

Maybe it's the weather? Very hot and uncomfortable at the moment so baby might be feeling it too..

Cosleeping never meant mine slept longer stretches. If anything I think we woke them up. It did mean I didn't have to get up to feed and could just roll over while they shimmied on up to the all night boob bar. I didn't sleep well with them in the bed and I only did it with both consistently until I got to the 6 months EBF mark.

My one year old hates sleeping. If we put him in the cot he wakes up as he gets separation anxiety, if we co sleep he thinks it's playtime. I

Co-sleeping with nocturnal babies is still better than endlessly waking to get up and see to them IMHO.

DD is 10 months and not a great sleeper. However she can be a ‘not great sleeper’ while I doze on enormous bed and she will often fall back to sleep on boob and stay there for a while.

The trick is having enough bed, I do that by kicking out the husband, there just isn’t the room to settled DD and then have space to sleep properly myself if there is also a huge lumbering Male in the room.

Get rid of him. Sofa/sofa bed/guest bedroom.

Then the sleep will be much easier to snatch

That’s the thing...I’d hoped she’d settle easier when she wakes even if it doesn’t encourage slight longer sleeps but if anything she’s harder to settle in bed as can’t employ usual tactics of walking and rocking, so have to get up anyway. She’s also not a big feeder at night so not making the most of all hours boob bar access 🤣

Never mind. Agree it might be the lying flat that is part of the problem

She will however sleep on my lap?!

DH been in spare room since birth!

Bedsharing not working for us. My baby has been a frequent waker since 3.5 months. She’s now almost 1 year old and I’m really struggling to believe it’ll get better. I’m in touch with lovely mums in a local group who all said “ride it out” and “it does get better in time” but I’m starting to doubt that’s the case for my baby. Not only does she wake frequently every night, there seems to be no correlation with what we do in the day. I used to try get the right wake windows, naps ect but none of it impacts the night and just causes more stress. The best night sleep we had when she was three weeks old and that 3 wake ups!

I give up on the cot every night before 11/12 and then we bedshare and that’s not much better. She just wants to feed constantly and seems to be in a light sleep the whole night as am I.

we have an appointment with a chiropractor for tension - she has very night cheeks and tension in neck apparently. She sleeps with her mouth slightly open which is apparently a red flag?? if this doesn’t work I think we will have to sleep train. She’s a determined little girl so I’ve been scared ti try sleep training because I envisage it won’t work for her. She’s never calm around sleep so I just see screaming all night and a distressed babe and mama.

anyway I guess I’m keen to hear if anyone had a baby who slept like this? Who always seemed to be in a light sleep? Had no chill around sleep (never slept in pushchair even)? Woke multiple times from 3.5-1yr? did it get better on its own? Or what did you do?