I want to change DD's name

[NellythePink]

My DD is 7 weeks old today, and my husband has left us. We were together for 12 years (married for 2) and I am devastated.

He says that he thought that he wanted marriage and children, but he has been really unhappy ever since I got pregnant.

He is moving to another city, but says he wants to still be a father to her.

I don't want to keep his name as I feel like it would be too painful, and like I am clinging on to him. But I want to have the same name as our daughter.

AIBU to ask him for permission to change her name? I know that I will never be able to change what is on her birth certificate, could that cause complications for me/her?

I should add, his surname is a bit weird and I have never really liked it, but I changed it because I love him.

I think I am basically in shock because I am thinking about practical stuff rather than the emotional devastation that I am trying not to think about. Trying to focus on my beautiful baby who is currently sleeping on me.

Anyway, if you have read this far then thank you! WWYD?

What an awful situation to be in

This need not be today's problem, or even this month's problem; you can delay it while you have higher priorities.

It is, however, very easy for an adult to change their legal name - you can do a statutory declaration and you don't need a deed poll. A solicitor I know who changed their name went with the statutory declaration option as it's cheaper, very easy and has to be accepted (they used it everywhere from the bank to the passport office to change documentation). I'm not sure how the process varies for children, but it does at least mean that you can revert to your maiden name before the divorce goes through.

I completely understand why you would want to change the name - and at this age your DD won't notice. I'd change it, personally

@AvocadosBeforeMortgages I'd never heard of a statutory declaration, thank you. That sounds like it could be a good option

for you,Nelly,I've no knowledge on this but didn't want to read and run.
So sorry this has happened.
If he is capable of leaving his wife and baby you are better off without him.It might not seen it now,but life will improve.It will be his loss.
I hope you have some family and friends around you.

YANBU and sorry you are going through this. Will he agree though? If he doesn't could you go double barrelled but know her as just your last name.

My DH has a double barrelled last name but for various reasons only uses 1 part and is known as that everywhere. This might appease him.