Toilet etiquette & new boyfriend?

[Bumblebrush]

I have a newish boyfriend. I've known him for 1.5yrs but we've been together 3 months. He's really lovely in so many ways & we really click, but one thing bothers me and I can't quite get used to it. He expects to be able to pee with the bathroom door open. It feels weird this needing to keep a sight-line to me. To explain better, our bathroom leads off the open-plan lounge kitchen and the bathroom door is directly in line with the sofa. I just find it ewww. What's the big deal about closing the door ffs? But when I challenged him he said 'Are you shaming me?' so I shut up about it. Thankfully, he hasn't taken a shit yet in full view. I've heard of people who're so open about everything that it doesn't matter but I don't like it. Something about it just spoils the magic for me. Aibu?

Surely it would be the wee troll, if it was a troll?

Come on, everyone! First thread, one post and you all tell it about your toilet habits. Show some sense!

You made a very reasonable request. I bet he doesn’t leave the door open at at work, or when you’ve got people round. He blew up, made it your problem and now you won’t say anything more. He is riding roughshod over your preferences/boundaries. I would proceed with caution. Take care of yourself.

Line of sight? What happens if you walk away from the line of sight?

I don't get this. Surely he can't control your line of sight and he doesn't have one unless he's sitting down or there's a very big mirror above the toilet?

I broke up once with boy at school after he'd cycled 8 miles in the rain and his hair was flattened to his head

This made me

I invited someone to my house. A friend. He went to the loo and a minute later I passed the bathroom to get my coat from my room. He was pissing with the door open!! He never got invited back.

I've never gone to the bathroom in front of my husband, or my kids. I lock the door when I'm home alone. That's private for me.

Come on, everyone! First thread, one post and you all tell it about your toilet habits. Show some sense

Yep. Good advice.

Every time he does it get up and walk to another room.

Noooo, I couldn't cope with that, some things are private!

When I lived in a much nicer house than I do now, the very first occasion we'd slept together, my bloke completely unselfconsciously swung his naked self out of bed, wandered into the en-suite bathroom - DIRECT EYELINE FROM WHERE I WAS LYING IN BED - flexed his feet, said 'ooh, underfloor heating' and had a wee with the door still wide open. I would have been aghast, had it not been for the fact he put the seat up first, then put the lid down before he flushed.

That's how I knew he was a keeper

Could you try getting up and pushing the door to, when he goes in there? Passive aggressive, yes, but he might take the hint without a row.

If he farts when he’s squeezing out the last few drops, I could see why it would rankle.

This poster has started at least one other thread on the same topic - don't give it airtime.

I would totally do what moreismore suggested.

Your new partner, though... odd. Did he grow up with lots of younger siblings that were potty training? Or in a commune? Very strange.

You're three months in. If you don't like this, and he won't alter his behaviour, then it's time to go your separate ways.

Little things like this, where one partner won't respect a perfectly reasonable request from the other, will lead to much bigger lack of respect issues in the future.

XH used to want me to hold his dick while he was peeing. He was grumpy when I refused. In that situation, I'd have been grateful for someone who just wanted a pee with the door open. Otherwise, it's a no from me.

DH and I have been together for 17 years and we’ve never witnessed each other on the loo.
Try to keep some mystery in the relationship! 😂

BTW, have been with DP for 3 years, and the bathroom door is firmly locked by both of us. It is a blessed relief.

Yeah, yeah of course this is real

@MissVanjie hahahahahahahahahaha 😂😂😂

I feel the same as you op. My DH and I decided not to do toilet things in front of each other right back at the start. There have been exceptions but only if we have been ill and needed help.
Just keeps the magic a bit I feel

Me and DH don't purposely pee in front of each other but if one is in the shower and the other needs to wee urgently we do so,. I really don't see what the problem is.

It would certainly never cross either of our minds to lock the bathroom door. In fact we don't even have a lock on the door nor did we in our last house

I'm not sure it's a problem as such, but I'd rather pee in the garden than in front of DP in the shower.

Fgs everyone, this is the toilet troll!

Get one of those self closing mechanisms for the door!

the 'shaming me' is a weird reaction. Sort of self-help book lingo way of turning it around into your problem, not respecting you asking politely for something...just not mature and just...bizarre. At the time what was your response to that? Mine would have been, 'what are you talking about? I just don't like seeing you go to the toilet, I find it really unpleasant. close the door, thanks.'