Kids playing outside - AIBU?

[Binkybix]

We live in a small gated close, with 9 houses. Each has a parking space and then there is a lot of shared communal space in the middle. There is a lease for the shared grounds that says nothing about use of it.

I’ve two children (4 and 2). Occasionally they will play there with another child who lives here. Only occasionally, always supervised. Never before 10am or after 6pm. We were playing out there today for about 15 minutes, then we went in.

Then a neighbour came round, saying that it’s not a playground and that we should take the children to the park. She said that she was trying to work and that she couldn’t take it anymore. She actually put it through as a letter but I heard it and opened the door.

Incidentally, her own younger children do play there sometimes. She also has form for being very highly strung about some other things.

I would add that I would consider myself quite sensitive to noise and genuinely don’t think it’s too much, and I am often the parent trying to make sure their kids are being considerate etc.

I just said that I was on the way out and we could discuss later if she wanted, but I think my manner clearly showed that I was not on board with her views.

Should I just carry on, or have I got this wrong? I think I’m right but would like other views.

YANBU- post some earplugs through her letterbox.

Make the most of letting them have that freedom, it is precious and rare.

Tell her it is shared outside residential space, not an office...if she needs silence to work, then she needs to rent office space 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s communal space for people to use, not her private garden. Stupid mare.

Well this is MN where the common theme of that people should never ever make a sound outside their own houses
On MN people aren’t allowed to make noise in their own home, let alone outside

Ditzy

YANBU. Even as someone who works and studies at home, I would say that this is a problem that follows from her working at home.

If she wants a peaceful workplace, she needs to go to one to work. You are using a residential area for its intended purpose.

I would check the deeds etc just to make sure there are no special provisions about use of that area, then quote that back to her as necessary.

her own younger children do play there sometimes

So, her children can play there, but other children can't? Okay then.....

I can kind of see where the annoyance comes from. I used to work from home to record training presentations. Setting up the mic seemed to spur neighbour's dog to randomly start barking, planes to fly over, council mowers to start etc etc.

But..

It was my problem not theirs so YANBU

Thanks all. I’m just going to carry on but make clear again to mine that they should stay clear of their house and play at the other end where possible.

Yanbu.
I got a screaming phone call from a neighbour in the next street because my children were playing outside, along with another boy she doesn't like.
She just screamed abuse until she hung up, I had just had chemotherapy and collapsed. Im still too scared 3 months on to walk my dog and pass through her street. I tried but had a panic attack.

She has totally ruined a disabled woman's life because she think she has a right to police who passes through her street. There needs to be anti social behaviour laws which can be used against bullies and stop them from harassing innocent people because of their own mental health problems.

We live in a small cul de sac which has around 21 children of varying ages. Therefore there are always kids out playing, whatever the weather. In the summer holidays they will be out there til 9pm, sometimes longer.

I honestly don't see the issue. They are kids out playing. Not yobs throwing bricks through windows.

Tell her to get a grip.

She used to be fine with me and the kids but seems to have taken against us as we are friendly with another family that she fell out with for a different reason.

If they’re not screaming and shouting then tell her your children have just as much right to play there as hers.
Honestly though are they making a lot of noise? I can’t see how she would be aware they were there otherwise. Lots of children play out in our street on bikes etc and I generally can’t hear them apart from the occasional hot day when a water fight happens.

Well they are 4 and 2 so they’re not silent, but they’re not shouting and screaming all the time.

I can generally tell if other children are playing in the close if I’m inside.

Did you not point out to her that her own children play there?

She is obviously mad.

Ide say anytime after 9am is more than acceptable on a day like today.

Ignore her.

Perhaps I missed a comment somewhere, Are you with them? Do you think they were too noisy? I’m assuming someone was supervising as they are v young to play out without you.

I didn’t say that, and possibly I should have, but I genuinely was on the way out and wanted to get on.

I also sort of didn’t even want to engage with it, because from what I know of her, she isn’t particularly amenable to others’ perspectives and just wants the control.

However, I feel that it’s inevitable that’s there’s going to be more, which is a shame as I just want to get along with people.

Yes - I was with them and I think they were ok. As I say, not silent, but not by their house and not constant shouting/screaming.

I work from home and I'm very sensitive to noise, but I wouldn't dream of complaining about children playing outside. It's their right and there are too few places where they can do it. Carry on!

Tell her to fuck off!!!

Lol that should straighten her out
Can you post a photo of the letter

keep the note and send it back to her with your details crossed out and hers over written the VERY second you see her children playing out there.

Hypocritical besom!

Yanbu one of the big pluses in roads like this is that the children can pls put safely.
As long as it’s normal play noise with no balls being banged on walls or kicked dangerously near cars then it’s OK.
I’m quite sensitive to noise (hate radios in gardens, shouty people etc.) and this wouldn’t bother me at all

YANBU

Saying there’s not constant screaming and shouting/they’re not screaming and shouting all the time implies there is intermittent screaming and shouting. If that’s the case then I think you need to get them to keep the noise down. Laughing and playing is normal noise but intermittent screaming isn’t necessary or ok imo.

There is the odd scream from the two year old and they might, for example, shout each other’s names occasionally. I said ‘not shouting or screaming’ all the time because people had said that that wasn’t ok, not to differentiate between actual frequent shouting and screaming if you see what I mean?