To ask if you think 24 is a young Mum?

[Cleo2628]

just wondering your opinions. I’m 24 with a 7 month old.

I agree with lots of other posters who are saying it seems to vary by area

Where I’m currently living 24 would be young, most seem to be 30+ when having their first.

There’s no right or wrong of course, although I imagine in early 20s is much healthier for the mother

Agree with james above, from a nature point of view 24 is probably the perfect age. I had a very easy pregnancy, worked on my feet until 36weeks with a big baby, birth wasn't so easy but recovery was quick.
My son has hands on grandparents and 2great grandparents. I will be young enough to help out with my own grandchildren if my son decided to have kids.
That is the natural order of things and the way it has always been until very very recently, my aunty was considered an old first time mum at 31 just 20years ago, now no one bat's an eye at 40yo having babies.

I’d say it’s on the young side but that’s not a bad thing, as many have said.

As an aside, I get so frustrated with the whole “I wanted to live my life before I had kids” attitude. Why does having children mean you’re suddenly not living? You can do plenty with children, if you just get organised and crack on! Gah! (Disclaimer: appreciate this depends on good health for all involved).

I’ve just moved to a different continent for my maternity leave with our 8 week old son (I’m 27, FTM) and am completely immersed in new culture/language/people etc. I might be a mother, but I’m “living” just fine!!

Rant over 😁

It seems like a normal age to me. I had my second at 23 and people certainly seemed more accepting of my age than they did first time round when I was 18/19.

Most of our friends are 40+ and just having their first or second and DH and I always say it seems too old. We couldn't do it now at 37 and 40. Whether that's because we have four children and are well out of the baby phase now or whether it's age I don't know.

It's quite young but far from teenage.

No I don’t at all, it wouldn’t shock me nor would I care. But I am the only one out of all my friends with baby and they are all around this age.

I had my first as a teen though, that was most definitely young.

I was 19 & 24. My boys are now 14 & almost 19. I still went to uni and also done a post grad, and built a career.
I have friends having their first now, with dads who are doing it the second time around (divorce), and the dad's are finding it really hard. They are struggling and finding they have no where near the energy they had in their early 20's. One was even in tears here the one night at the thought that he has this for another 17 years.
So there's pros to having them early!

@user1484167681

As an aside, I get so frustrated with the whole “I wanted to live my life before I had kids” attitude. Why does having children mean you’re suddenly not living? You can do plenty with children, if you just get organised and crack on! Gah! (Disclaimer: appreciate this depends on good health for all involved).

Yeah you can do plenty with children, but there is a lot you CAN'T do without them, and can only do as a child-free person or couple.

In my late teens and 20's , I travelled around South and North America, (for 3 months,) sometimes sleeping in parks, and in a '5 to a room' situation in a hostel. I also went backpacking around Eastern Europe for 3 months.

I also went to uni for 3 years and went to Africa for 4 months whilst I was there, and I also got involved with some uni activities and groups, including a drama and music group - and we put on over a dozen plays in the 3 years I was there.

On a number of occasions, I booked a holiday to Paris or London, or New York, the day before I went. In addition, I got pissed every Friday night for 2-3 years, (sometimes didn't get in til 5am, and often slept til 1pm on Saturday.)

I sometimes finished work on a Thursday, grabbed a 'chippy lunchbox' from the chipshop and a can of coke, and then went straight to the cinema til 8pm, then went to the pub til midnight.

Me and friends/boyfriend would go to see a west end show in London (70 miles away at the time,) at the drop of a hat. I would also sometimes lie in til midday on a Sunday, then hop out of bed and go for a 10 mile bike ride, a pub lunch, and then slowly make my way home and go to bed.

Sometimes (in my career,) I would work from 7am til 11pm and not get home til midnight, and be back at work at 7m the next morning!

No WAY would I have ever been able to do all of the above if I had had children in my teens and 20's.

You would have to be incredibly naive to think you could do all of the above with babies/ toddlers/ children in tow.

Of COURSE you can have a life - and a very good one at that - with children, and you can go places, and have fun with them, and do old childhood stuff you used to do yourself, but don't kid yourself that you can still do everything with children, that you used to do without them, because that is utter nonsense.

Re the OP, yes I think 24 is too young to settle down with children. I would have waited at least another 5 years.

@user1484167681

As an aside, I get so frustrated with the whole “I wanted to live my life before I had kids” attitude. Why does having children mean you’re suddenly not living? You can do plenty with children, if you just get organised and crack on! Gah! (Disclaimer: appreciate this depends on good health for all involved).

Yeah you can do plenty with children, but there is a lot you CAN'T do with them, and can only do as a child-free person or couple.

In my late teens and 20's , I travelled around South and North America, (for 3 months,) sometimes sleeping in parks, and in a '5 to a room' situation in a hostel. I also went backpacking around Eastern Europe for 3 months.

I also went to uni for 3 years and went to Africa for 4 months whilst I was there, and I also got involved with some uni activities and groups, including a drama and music group - and we put on over a dozen plays in the 3 years I was there.

On a number of occasions, I booked a holiday to Paris or London, or New York, the day before I went. In addition, I got pissed every Friday night for 2-3 years, (sometimes didn't get in til 5am, and often slept til 1pm on Saturday.)

I sometimes finished work on a Thursday, grabbed a 'chippy lunchbox' from the chipshop and a can of coke, and then went straight to the cinema til 8pm, then went to the pub til midnight.

Me and friends/boyfriend would go to see a west end show in London (70 miles away at the time,) at the drop of a hat. I would also sometimes lie in til midday on a Sunday, then hop out of bed and go for a 10 mile bike ride, a pub lunch, and then slowly make my way home and go to bed.

Sometimes (in my career,) I would work from 7am til 11pm and not get home til midnight, and be back at work at 7m the next morning!

No WAY would I have ever been able to do all of the above if I had had children in my teens and 20's.

You would have to be incredibly naive to think you could do all of the above with babies/ toddlers/ children in tow.

Of COURSE you can have a life - and a very good one at that - with children, and you can go places, and have fun with them, and do old childhood stuff you used to do yourself, but don't kid yourself that you can still do everything with children, that you used to do without them, because that is utter nonsense.

Re the OP, yes I think 24 is too young to settle down with children. I would have waited at least another 5 years.

I was 26 when ds1 arrived. They called me an "elderly primigravida" in the hospital

Sorry, I know this was a few pages back, but this was definitely a thing in the 1970s. My DM had that recorded on her notes when I was born in the late 70s. She was 27! Shows how much things have changed in a generation.

I don't think there's a perfect age to have children. I had mine in my early 30s. My career was fairly established but it's still taken a massive hit because I chose to have a baby rather than go for a promotion, then returned part-time. And DH is a few years older than me so will be retirement age by the time the youngest is at university/working age.

Christ User V after your list of things I don't feel like I've missed out at all having children young.

I was 23. A few friends had kids at a similar time. Most had them later. At the school gates I'm one of the youngest even for my youngest child.

I was 17 with DS1 and 19 with DS2. Me and DH still together though and he was my first love ❤

Not terribly young . Old enough to have an education and been working for a couple of years .

Less than 20 is too young .

I think 24 is a great age from a health perspective to have a baby. However I absolutely would not have chosen this route myself because of the financial and social implications.
I really hope for your sake that you have finished a degree and have a secure, permanent job to go back to after maternity leave.

Perceptions have changed over the years. I do consider 24 to be 'young mum' territory but not in a 'kids having kids' kind of way.

I am 23 with 3 dc's, a 6yr old, 5yr old and a 3yr old and im done on having kids now. They are all out of the baby stage, they all sleep well through the night and I get a good nights kip aswell. I wanted kids since I was 13 so it was no surprise to anyone that I had them younger. I dont think age has much to do with it (within reason obv, not talkin a 13yr old) it's more where you are at mentally in being prepared to have a child that is dependent on you for many years. I couldnt imagine having kids ant later, ive had mine and now I an getting the chance to pick a career and make a life for myself with my kids and not have to stop and take breaks to have new born babies, best decision I ever made and wouldnt change a thing.

Yes. I say this as someone who has my first child in my late teens. I know exactly three people including myself who are your age or younger with children/expecting children.

No, not at all. Why on earth would you think it is?

Yes 24 is young and a nice age to have your first in my opinion, I was 23 but looked younger once got id'd at the supermarket while had him in his pram 😂

Age is just a number remember that ! My sister was 15 when she had her eldest that was in 1992 it was really hard for her so much judgement around and with a lot of help and support shes been an amazing mum. Funnily enough she had her youngest when she was 37 and she told me how weird it was going to play groups and the school runs etc been known as the young mum, and now one of the eldest, her daughter is actually at school now with kids whos mums were friends with her eldest daughter in school 😂😂

I can’t imagine many teenagers being mentally ready to have kids at 17 missmorley. Your brain doesn’t stop developing until you’re 25.

It would have been too young for me. I didn't earn enough, was in rented accommodation, didn't feel 'ready' to settle and wasn't married.
I had mine later in 30's when married, had my own home, had my career established and was ready to settle.

Depends on where you are in life in terms of security for you and your child.

It depends on the person. Some are quite mature and responsible at that age and some are still a bit like teenagers. My friend had her first at 20 andtook to it very naturally. Her kids are very well cared for and loved. Her fuckwit of a partner who was a few years older than her went into panic mode.

No. It's not young. 16-18 is young. I was 23. It's a good Age if that's the way it works out. Each to their own. I had loads of energy and loved it. I've had a child at 40 and was so much more tired and found everything harder (but loved the outcome just the same!)