Adult Tantrums..

[getawfmylaaaand]

I witnessed something incredible today.

I was in a meeting with a usually lovely client and had to essentially demand that she paid an outstanding invoice. Invoice had gone unpaid for 3 months and after a lot of probing, it’s got to the point where we had to bring her in for a discussion. She’s in her mid-40’s and very well respected in her field. She’s been a pleasure to work with until now!

Anyway, I went in professional and to the point, and then my lovely client transformed into a toddler in a full screaming tantrum, complete with foot stomping and the phrase forever now etched on my memory: ‘it’s my money I’ll pay whoever I want!’.

She went bright red in the face, balled her fists and actually stomped.

I’ve never seen anything like it and in complete shock, I didn’t say a word for a bit too long and just sat there, horrified

Anyway, eventually my colleague said ‘so the choice is we cease service and begin proceedings to collect the arrears or you pay the arrears and we’ll carry out the work to the end of the contract, we’ll leave it with you’.

Half an hour later she paid us

Im still in shock, is this a thing? Ive not been in a lot of board level meetings so Im not sure if this is commo. (It’s certainly not normal!). Do these kinds of screaming meltdowns happen often or have I just been unlucky?

I need gin.

My eldest sister used to throw terrible tantrums, to such an extent that it looked absolutely loony. She has mellowed, and doesn't do it now. But also, she chose who she did it with - our mother or father, or one of her siblings, or random friends of ours. Not of hers! Since our parents died and I stopped taking it she doesn't do it any more.

I used to work for someone ‘mercurial’. He was never violent or threw things but he’d flip suddenly and start shouting. When he was finished he’d either storm out of the meeting room or sit back down but turn his chair so he had his back to the room, just like a toddler, with his arms folded while hep stropped.

People are weird.

You daren't laugh, either, no matter how ridiculous they're being. Once when my sister was literally dancing with rage I started to laugh, and that tipped her over the edge altogether. She said I was happy now that she was upset. She was upset because my father had moved her newspaper - in his own house! "Nobody moves my newspaper, I don't like people touching my things!!!" FFS, why wouldn't you laugh at such a ridiculous carry on?

Hmmm I manage someone like this. It's a fucking nightmare. She always tries to blame the behaviour on me. It's not rational. Or grown up. Makes me want to run away. Far away.

I've had a customer have a full on tantrum, complete with foot stamping and spittle flying, all becaus I told her I couldn't do something which was physically impossible and definitely not legal. She screamed so much that she had a nose bleed, and stamped out of the room, screaming at random passersby that I was nothing but a lazy cunt. She then complained to a manager and tried to get me fired, not realising that said manager worked for a completely different company. She came a few days later, and I had the great pleasure of being extremely pleasant to her while she tried to ignore me while I dealt with her business. She still comes by, every once in a while, and it always seems to be me who gets to deal with her. I can only assume she's never been told 'no' in her life!

I remember seeing a bloke on the street in central London bellowing into his phone 'I WANT MY MONEY AND I WANT IT NOW!'

I doubt he got his money.

I had a customer shout and scream and stamp her feet for much the same reason.

She had a few unpaid invoices dating back a few months and I’d chased her several times. She came in to order some work, I said I’d be happy to process her order if she brought her account up to date. She lost her shit big time. Stamped her feet and screamed, then slammed her purse down on the counter several times, went to the door and opened/slammed it shut/opened it/slammed it shut then stormed out. We had to take her to court in the end

We just stood there in open mouthed amazement. It was mad

I had a staff member who did that. She was eventually fired, which is quite surprising as the civil service is a bit shit at dealing with issues.

Oh, and we had a bride come in, at 4pm the day before her wedding and asked if we could supply something

We couldn’t - we’re not a shop, or a wedding planner or anything like that. We don’t sell the item she wanted and had absolutely no way of getting it in time - an intricate handmade item that takes several hours to make.

She threw an almighty strop - stamping her feet, the works, then left a bad review on our Facebook page claiming we’d ruined her special day

From experience I would say the company has cash flow problems. I would be very wary from now on. I would keep clients like this on a very short leash invoice wise after that.

40 odd year old male who thought he was the man that every man wants to be and that every woman wants to be with.

Lazy as fuck.

Was so used to getting his own way and having women flutter their eyelashes and melt around him that he did not take having a female boss who was completely impervious to his charms very well at all (ie, me!)

Tantrums complete with foot stomping and door slamming (usually my office one) we're a regular thing.

I've worked in credit control for the last 6 years and have lost count of the number of tantrums I've encountered tbh

Lots of people (almost invariably company directors rather than your average middle aged lady working in accounts) think the rules don't apply to them and they should be able to pay whenever it suits them, regardless of the T&C's they've signed up to when opening a credit account

Im exTV industry and saw a lot of this- and not just from the 'talent'. One lauded production company owner called me a cunt and threw the mother of all tantrums over where he was sat on a plane.
It was my second or third job in the industry, and he'd made my life miserable for months. I left the job the next day.

Recently saw him at a wedding and had actual palpitations on seeing him - and I'm no shrinking violet.

OP, have a search online for information around the research and theories of Canadian psychiatrist Eric Berne.

He suggested that there are three “ego states” (parent, adult, child) and interactions with people can vary (and be controlled) when you know who is playing what role, and respond accordingly.

It’s quite interesting, especially if you can learn how to adjust your style when dealing with different types of people (not that I think you did anything wrong and needed to adjust your behaviour- just that it’s handy to be able to recognise and influence these characteristics).

My old boss (CEO of his own company) used to throw full on tantrums just like a toddler would. Bright red face, clenched fists, screaming and on one occasion he actually lay down on the floor and started kicking his legs! It was utterly utterly bizarre to see a 50 year old man act like a three year old! He would demote people/fire them/reduce their salaries in his fits but he never carried out those threats. To be honest we didn't feel scared of him, just embarrassed and even a bit sympathetic as he clearly had an emotional/psychological condition and he looked so ridiculous! But it was very strange and after he finished a tantrum we would all just act as if nothing happened.

Could she be menopausal?

I guess all the men mentioned on the thread must be, too.

@Juells, got the same.

You should try working in newspapers.

I had to speak to a team member (I was her boss) about something she’d done wrong. I had stomping, walking off, turning it round on me, it was all my fault she’d fraudulently done something. It was weird. I’d only ever had to mention minor things up til then. She did not like being caught out!

A ndn used to do this, serious tantrums, repeated door slamming. Stopped once the dc arrived, thankfully.

Someone in charge at my hobby did it all the time, absolutely mad behaviour. We’d walk in, one by one, all of us got screaming in the face, he went bright red, blamed us for whatever incident he’d made up, I’m amazed he didn’t keel over with a heart attack, old fellow he was and not in good health.

You should try working in newspapers

Bit crinkly for my liking.