Is it acceptable to leave out one child?

[PorkFlute]

6 kids playing out together in the street. 5 of them all close friends and one who is close to a couple but doesn’t know the others that well. Is it reasonable for a parent to go out and give ice lollies to the 5 who know each other well and not the 6th?

Of course not

Not reasonable. If I only had 5 lollies id not give any out.

No! That would be really mean.

I think it's a bit mean and I wouldn't do it.

I suppose it is difficult giving out lollies to a kid you don't know in case of allergies/parental disapproval though.

Is this a partial reverse?

Was the left-out child yours?

You can't do that - that would look awful and may well really upset the left out child who wouldn't know what he/she had done wrong....

Nope but i can well imagine some parents that do this.

No that's awful

Depends on the reason for it tbh. I wouldn't expect all kids to miss out because one is vegan for example, or if the parents had moaned about food being given before. It does happen.

Not a reverse as such. Tried to word the post in a way that didn’t give away if I was the one giving the lollies or not.
It was my dd who was left out though. She came inside and told me and seemed a bit glum about it but I’ve played it down and she’s fine.
I wouldn’t dream of leaving out children like that though. I always make sure all children are included or none.
I get the allergies thing as my other child has allergies but if they’re out alone they know what they can and can’t eat. If there are any children I don’t know I just get them to go and check with their parent before giving them anything.
These are neighbours we are on nodding terms with though. And the dd of the parent who did it has just called round to see if my dd is coming back out to play!

No i most certainly would not!
Slightly different but..
School did an attendance week. For all those who go 100% that week will be rewarded with an ice lolly. DD who is at nursery there was poorly Mon-Tues. High temp, having to use her inhaler due to coughing fits that were making her bring up phlegm.
Come Friday all the children got an ice lolly except for my DD and another child.
I know the rules were they had to go 100% that week, but honestly excluding 3 and 4 year olds like that really ticked me off. I didn't say anything and explained to DD that we can have lots if ice lollies at home. She was ok, but told me she cried at Nursery.
I don't believe your DD should have been left out. I just couldn't do that to her.

Not on.

It's more than likely to be the allergies worry then. If you're only on nodding terms they probably only know that one of your children has allergies, but not which one so don't want to risk physical damage.

People generally aren't nasty and malicious, just a bit thoughtless and ignorant sometimes.

I doubt they know about either child having allergies tbh. My point was that dd would only have had to open the door to ask me if allergies/not being allowed was their concern.
I’m pretty sure it was just because dd isn’t part of the 5.

And leaving 3 year olds out of a treat because they were ill is just really poor practice in a nursery ipitthescrewinthetuna. They probably wouldn’t punish a child like that at the end of the week if they’d actually done something wrong!

I agree it's not OK!

@PorkFlute I couldn't believe it!
It was not DDs choice not to go Nursery, it was mine! They punished her for it! Its disgusting! She was layed out on sofa for 4 says she hadn't eaten since Saturday.
I think what your DD went through was unfair and hurtful for a child. I hope she is OK now!

Dreadful

No that's horrible!!! Either they ALL get something or no one gets anything. And if it's something that 1 child can't have due medical reasons then I'll find them something they could have and remember for next time!