To ask whether I have any rights?

[RoyalSchmuck]

My DS father pays child maintenance, but only £15 a week. In the school holidays my childcare provider has a holiday price of £20 a day (standard 8am - 6pm) then £3 an hour outside those times, so a typical work week during the holidays can cost around £115...

I asked ExP to contribute towards childcare costs in the holidays, or alternatively have DS half the holiday time. He has refused and told me that “he pays his maintenance” and “by law I don’t have to pay you the cost of childcare” and has been very nasty about it!!

This time it’s only a week off school, but I’m conscious the six weeks holidays are fast approaching. Do I have any rights in regards to him paying towards childcare or am I stuck with a measly £15 a week (of which he constantly sends late!)

He works cash in hand and is studying full time so has gleefully told me in the past if I go through CSA I’ll get around £5 a week “if you’re lucky”. He acts like £15 a week is him doing me a favour and “you should be privileged I don’t just give you £5 a week”.

He has DS maybe one weekend every 4-5 weeks and even then will sometimes force me to pay for things (such as petrol, meals out etc) on the basis of “I won’t have him if you don’t transfer that money” which in turn only hurts DS, who adores his dad and thinks the world of him. Saying no when he already sees him so little as it is would really hurt my DS

£15 a week won’t even pay for one day in the holidays club I workfull time but i don’t earn enough to pay £600 in the six weeks holidays. I have a few annual leave days left but not a lot left after booking Christmas holidays etc...

Is there anything I can do or do I just accept this is how it is in terms of childcare costs?

I'm not an expert but reading it no I don't think you do. Students don't have to pay cm i know that much.

Have you looked into child care element of tax credits (universal credit maybe if your area is full service?).

Sadly he is correct.

STOP paying for stuff and enabling him though.

I'm afraid you can't do anything, he doesn't legally have to contribute anything above his CMS calculation, regardless or childcare expenses. If your on a lower income you should be entitled to tax credits to cover most of the childcare though.

Guessing if he only has DS every 4/5 weeks then he's not going to help cover the holidays himself? If he's a student surely he's off over summer too?

What Foof said. He's useless, but there isn't anything you can do

Please stop giving him any money, you're effectively just giving what little he gives you back. While you're trying to do the right thing by your son, it's up to him to fund anything when DS is with him as you do when he's with you. If he really won't see his child unless you pay him to, he'll get bored and stop bothering in time anyway.

What Holly said. If he's not working FT and he is at uni then why isn't he caring for DS over the summer to help save on childcare costs and spend more time with him? However, my ex never contributed to childcare fees and it's not something you can request in maintenance calculations so you are in your own with that.

I know you said DS adores him and you don't want him hurt, but your ex is saying you basically have to pay for him to see him or he won't bother. That sadly says it all about how much he adores your DS.