To buy a wedding dress?

[LawDegreeBarbie]

DH and I got married three years ago abroad. We eloped due to a small budget and family issues and neither of us wanted a big wedding. I didn't have a dress.

Flashforward to now and I really regret not having wedding photos and a dress. I still don't want a wedding but a lovely wedding photo with DH and I dressed up with our DC would be something to cherish. I'd also love for my children to keep on to a wedding dress like I have with my now deceased mum (although she was tiny so it doesn't go near me to ever wear).

Would I be unreasonable to just buy a dress, hire a photographer to take some photos and keep it to hand down? It sounds ridiculous to my friends without a vow renewal to accompany it but I really don't want a wedding with lots of people there, it's just about photos and a dress for me as our wedding was super fun and exactly how we'd want to say our vows.

But why would your children want a dress you'd had some photos taken in once? It has no sentimental value like your own mums dress does to you. You didn't wear it on your wedding day, say your vows in it etc. If you want to buy a dress then you should, but I think you're being silly to think of it as an heirloom.

You're right, they wouldn't think it has as much sentimental value as my engagement or wedding ring.

I'm overthinking it, I know. Deep down I just want a pretty photo with my DH as that's the only side of our wedding we both regret and I love going through my mum's wedding photos every few years as she looked so beautiful and happy with my dad before she fell ill.

Why don't you just have a lovely family photoshoot, and have them do some couple ones as well? Spend the money you'd spend on a dress on some fantastic outfits for you all (that you can wear again!).

Could you hire a dress and suit for photos? Otherwise buy a cute ivory dress that isn't necessarily a wedding dress and have lovely photos done in that.

Yanbu to want 'wedding photos'. I love ours!

Have a blessing with no guests (assuming you had a civil ceremony first time) is perfectly legitimate, not a vow renewal, would be a lovely family day and create great memories. I’m sure you could find a vicar/minister/imam/etc happy to do it as a very small affair.

Posing for fake wedding photos OTOH, is a bit artificial and strange.

If you want to do that, op, then do it - it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. But I don't think you should expect looking at those pictures to feel the same as your parents wedding day /looking at your mum's dress. It may still feel really great, but it might not be in the same way.

Personally I would feel that buying a wedding dress just to wear for an hour for some pictures was a waste of money, but then I have never day dreamed about a big white dress/perfect wedding. If I think about buying an outfit I HAVE daydreamed about (in my case, an insanely cool space pilot/futuristic military flight suit) then I start to see a bit where you're coming from

I think this is a really nice idea and nothing wrong with it at all - in this day and age people make their own traditions!

I think I would get some lovely outfits for you all and pay for a location photo shoot somewhere you think is beautiful it means something to you both.

I see where you're coming from but I don't think you'll capture the same emotion in a posed non-wedding photo tbh.

If you want the all out pretty dress thing then book a holiday to Venice and go to a masquerade ball!