To persevere with toilet training?

[Badgerandfox]

Posting a bit for traffic sorry if it's long.

Ds will be 3 next month. Decided to do toilet training this week armed with a potty, a toilet seat and loads of pants.

Ds has been unwilling to sit on the toilet before long enough to actually do anything, so I decided on cold turkey, I contained him to the downstairs where we have wood floors, and had him run around with nothing on his bottom half.

Yesterday was day 1, ds was quite enthusiastic about it all.

Yesterday went quite well, a couple of wee accidents and a poo on the floor, but most wees in the potty, he was really pleased with himself when he got one in the potty.

However, I did notice that he still wees a LOT, he went maybe 10 times yesterday and is quite unpredictable, so he might go, then do another 10 minutes later.

Today hasn't gone quite so well. 3 accidents so far and three wees in the potty, although I'd put him in pants. He seems more aware when he's naked. However he keeps asking for trousers on.

I haven't made any fuss over accidents just said ooops never mind and cleaned up.

He is getting on the potty of his own accord with gentle reminders.

Trouble is we're all going a bit stir crazy in the house, I've an older ds and he's climbing the walls and even ds2 is very bored.

What should I do if we go out? Pants and trousers and risk it, or pull up nappies? I know you're supposed to stay in but I don't think we can!

When I potty trained ds1 he was totally ready and we didn't have any accidents but I'd left it until he was 3yo3mo but he had quite good bladder control by then.

Hmmm, doesn’t sound ready. Both of mine were a lot younger but they were at the stage or handing me a nappy every time they had weed in it.
Does he drink a lot?

I think naked on bottom half is a bad idea - it’s not how it will be normally and there’s no feeling of being wet to kind of connect the dots. I would do pull ups for out and about but pants and trousers at home.

No, hasn't had many drinks really, milk in the morning and juice with lunch.

Get a load of undies and leave them on. It’s rubbish but it will make him understand the uncomfortable feeling of being wet when he starts to wee.

I reckon jus persevere. Mine was a bit like this for the first couple of days, but I persevered and it only took 4 days and he was totally dry. You could always give it a few days and if he doesn’t get it give up and try again later.

I would just go with pants and trousers when you go out and take loads of spare clothes. Also - and I know others wouldn’t recommend this - but mine got loads better when I started bribing him with a biscuit. Not for each wee though - he got a biscuit if he kept dry all day. Worked a treat

When we had to go out during the early stages of potty training, I used to put normal pants on DC and then a pull up over the top.

That way they’d still get the feeling of being in pants - and being wet if they had a wee - while making it easier to clean it all up while out and about.

I tried pull ups on their own first, but DC just treated those as nappies. Pull ups on their own never worked for us until after DC had cracked toilet training.

When my son seemed ready at 2 yrs 8 mths, we tried and failed. I then tried reverse psychology. I bought another new potty, placed it discreetly behind a chair and told DS "this isn't for you now. It's for when you're bigger and cleverer and can sit on the potty to do wees and poohs. You not old enough yet though "etc etc. All said very casually and distractedly.

He never wore a nappy again, day or night! Worked with my DDs too!

I'd leave it and try in a few months.

Your DS was nearly a year and a half older when you toilet trained. Whats the rush with DS2?

Sorry i see it's only 4 months difference!

Still i'd leave it a bit. I think mine were all 3 and a little bit when we did it and it was quite quick then.

Contrary to popular belief for most kids potty training takes a week or so of work. Just because it's not instant doesn't mean he's not ready. I'd give it a fortnight before reconsidering.

No ds1 was 3 months older. He was dry at 3years and 3 months old.

Ds2 will be turning 3 next month.

I'm not really bothered if we wait a few more months for ds2 to be dry.

But as we've started I'm thinking it might be worth persevering,

He doesn’t sound ready to me. My own son couldn’t ‘get it’ until about 3y 9m.

We’d tried a few times but he couldn’t manage.

At 3y 4m it took 3 days. Since the. He’s had a handful of accidents and only wet the bed once.

Waiting unt they’re properly ready is well worth it in my opinion.

I didn't do a potty I got one of these urinals 👇 brilliant until big enough for toilet,my ds found it easier and the novelty of aiming was fun

I seem to remember it being very easy with ds1, but he was that bit older. I vaguely remember doing what greenapples said and putting a pull up over a pair of pants for going out, I only needed to do that once and it all clicked.

I'll carry on a few more days but with the pants on.

I know I'm probably being impatient (I'm absolutely not being impatient with ds). We're just not used to staying in!

At the age he is - ie you're not pushing v early - I'd keep going a few days longer. Give it a week in total? My ds1 actually got worse before he got better. Sometimes I think the accidents make it all click into place.

I agree that he needs pants on at the least, to get used to getting them up/down but also the feel of when he's had an accident.

Definitely stay naked on the bottom half until he's consistently weeing in the potty. Yes it's boring being at home but its more boring wasting money on nappies! When he's got that. go commando under trousers with short trips out. Take potty everywhere. When he's got that then pants and trousers. read "Oh Crap It's Potty Training". Has worked for everyone I know.

Persevere definitely and get loads of pants and keep those on him so he experiences feeling wet when he goes (plus it will catch the poos!).

When I was training mine, at this stage if we had to go out I would shove on a pull up, but in a week or so try without pull up, just take spare clothes and get some of those disposable changing mats to put on the car seat/buggy seat in case of an accident in there.

Good luck!

I wouldn’t give up, in my experience it takes a good week to really have it click. If you haven’t had any progress after a week then you can go back to nappies but you really do just have to prepare yourself for a hard week with lots of accidents and then it will all be worth it

Oh and if you need to go out I definitely wouldn’t go for the nappy or pull-up option as that can be confusing. Make sure you are armed with lots of spare clothes!

Go out! Can you easily go for walks/bike rides, to the park etc? We did, if they have accident just quick change in to spares and a handful of carrier bags to put dirty clothes in. Or if he announces he needs a wee, a quick one on the grass (packet of wipes and nappy bags handy just in case..."I need a wee...turns into I'm doing a poo!") My daughter was almost 3 when we potty trained. We just picked short, outdoorsy type trips out to begin with.

He's just done a poo on the potty and I wasn't even in the room, he just did it.

That's pretty encouraging right?

Yes we live near parks and nice walks etc, probably just need to go for it don't I? Armed with loads of spares.

We did pull ups for trips out. My DS is also 3 next month and we trained him about 6 weeks ago. He was definitely ready though as he had very few accidents after the first day.

The staying in part sucks. We made it 2 days in the house and the third day we had a birthday party so I just put him in a pull up. He’s my oldest though and I started on a Friday so at least the weekend DH and I could take turns staying home. I also gave him a smartie every time he peed in the toilet (and washed hands and put pants back on). I think that did help and he stopped asking for them after a week or so. I had visions of him demanding smarties for eternity.

I still keep them as a handy bribe though. Especially as he’s not great at going to the loo in advance before we leave the house. My friend did the pants under pull up which seemed to work

@MaMisled great idea, I’m going to try that one.
I too have a ds(3) who is proving very resistant to potty training.

Keep going! Don’t worry about going out..just pop him in pants and go out...ideally somewhere with a loo. If he wets himself just change him. They need the practice and he WILL have accidents but that’s how he learns. Positive reinforcements like stickers helped us a lot.