To worry about PFB going to Reading

[KingscoteStaff]

DS is planning to go to Reading Festival after GCSE results day. He would be going with 5 friends and would know quite a few other people there too.

He has never been to a festival. He has never been to a pop concert! He has slept in a tent once, at PGL in Year 6.

Now I was feeling very positive about this new experience but over the last fortnight it seems that everyone I talk to has a Reading Horror Story. Apparently:

1. He will drink far too much, vomit in his sleep and asphyxiate.
2. He will take drugs for the first time and become instantly addicted.
3. While drunk/high he will have a terrible, life-changing accident.
4. While drunk/high he will forget to take his asthma medication and have an attack.
5. Unknown scary people will set his tent on fire.
6. Unknown scary people will attack him and steal his money/phone.

Does anyone have any slightly less horrific Reading experiences and (even more helpfully) some Top Tips for successful 16 year old festivalling?

I had a miserable time at Reading as a 19 year old feeling like one of the oldest there! Nothing dangerous at all (unless you count the toilets which could probably be used as some kind of biochemical weapon by the last day) but I didn't get a single night's sleep as we made the mistake of camping quite close to the arena and right next to the metal walkway through the campsite. That was over a decade ago though.

Top tips:
Camp far away
Know in advance how to put your tent up
Don't forget your tent (DH did this once in his misspent youth)
Go into town for breakfast so you get a reasonably priced hot meal and use a proper toilet once a day

Talk through the safety issues/ looking after valuables etc. And then trust him. 16 seems to be standard age for wanting to go with mates, post GCSE. It’s what our kids did and had a fabulous time

The suggestion to make festivals 18 + only is ridiculous. An 18 year old is an adult and can choose to do whatever they please, as long as it’s lawful. If they have no graduated progression towards being an adult, they’ll be clueless. Being a parent is about guiding them towards adulthood.

You only hear about the things that go tragically wrong at festivals. Hundreds of thousands of young people simply have a fab time.

My sister has OCD but she used to go to Leeds and Reading at that age, with no previous camping experience, I’ve no idea how she coped since all her rituals were about cleanliness and contamination but she did and enjoyed it enough to keep going back

How sensible is he? I would definitely talk to him about safety. Realistically people at Reading will be drinking, having sex and experimenting with drugs. I would definitely acknowledge what will happen there and talk to him about safety - how to look after himself and his friends. If he is going to experiment with drugs it shouldn't be drugs he's bought from a stranger at Reading (although to be fair the friends that did this when I was young mainly ended up buying stuff that just had no effect). If he's going to sleep with someone he should be careful with protecting and who he sleeps with (a cousin's friend slept with a girl at a festival who turned out to be 13!).

I went to reading at the same age post GCSEs (10 years ago). I got really drunk, smoked fags, survived on packet noddles and didn't wash for 3 days. I'd say that 80% of my friends did the same (the other 20% took drugs). I could have taken drugs if I'd wanted too but tbh I'd seen my friends high on drugs and how stupid they acted so was always put off, plus I found it a bit scary.

If your son is sensible then I'd say to trust him. Plus maybe bring up the current (very sad) news stories about the two teens dying from taking drugs at a festival. That hopefully would be enough to put the willies up him about it.

DD went after her GCSEs - there were a few sagas for friends but she was sensible, had a great time, and came back exhausted. She did get drunk one night but thats normal for a teenager. She had to lend friend's money and take them to the First aid tent when worried about their drug intake. DD got her (cheap) portable charger nicked from her tent. There are chargers there but they are very expensive - so a portable charger makes sense.

My DS is going too. Tips for him are:

• Be careful to note location of tent and identifying landmarks nearby so you can get back to it
• get a disposable tent and leave it behind
• look out for each other - especially if anyone gets drunk - get them back to the tent
• dont be too excessive so that you cant look after yourself (DONT DO DRUGS)
• limit valuables, keep money close to body
• write mobile phone numbers of friends on a piece of paper in case you lose your phone

Mine went last year, there were about 30 odd kids from his year. Loved, loved, loved it, came home filthy, 4kg lighter, bruises from the mosh pits (one girl got a black eye) had an absolute ball. There will be weed, some beer and possibly vodka, they had half an E each one night. Probably nox as well. It's not what you want for them, but it's part of growing up for many, and Reading is heavily stewarded, lots of first aid points and the events this weekend will mean even more drug testing available. Tell him to stick with his mates, everyone look out for everyone else, keep the phone charged.

Water is free, so staying hydrated easy. But the standpipes run quite slowly and there are queues, so extra money to buy water.
Antiseptic gel. Wet wipes.

A small bag that can go cross wise will keep gel,wetwipes, water, phone and money safe in the moshiest of mosh pits.
You can hire a locker with a phone charging point for valuables and,er, phone charging.
Give him brioche! Keeps well, means he has breakfast available at all times without having to leave the tent. Will make him popular if there is enough to share.
Mars bars or similar hi-energy hits. Festival food is not great and they'll be too busy having fun to bother much.

My son's going again this year, and is currently in bed. When he gets up, I'll ask for any other tips and pass them on!

I was worried too, but they loved it so much I ended up feeling very happy that I had a well-adjusted, sociable lad who knew his way around a festival at a point when I barely knew my way into town.

List contd.:

• Walk into town each morning for breakfast + loos
• baby wipes and antibacterial gel
• loo roll
• bin liners
• waterproof bag for phone
• note location of tent
• emphasise looking after each other (no man left behind)
• Make physical list of phone numbers in case of lost phones.

Disposable tent and leave it behind? Really?

Do people take rucksacks? Wheelie cases?

The Reading Kingsmeadow Tesco is a few mins walk away from the site. There is a coffee shop toilets etc. ..but not sure if they ban the festies from entering... whilst shopping there last Aug saw groups of teens attending the fest, couldn't believe how YOUNG they all looked. Apparently if your over 19 you are the OLDEST there.

Did Reading when I was 18 ( er in 1987!) but was prob a bit tamer back then.

Would I send my 16 year old? Hmmm...not sure. But if he is a sensible lad who will text and call you to report he is still alive... then yes!!

DS is also going this year with a group of friends. They're getting tips on what to take, where to camp etc from those with older siblings who have already been.

I booked a locker which has a charging point when I ordered the tickets.

I'm trying not to think about all the things I got up to at festivals (and I was a couple of years older). I'm also a bit surprised about how it seems to be standard for parents to buy the tickets now.

- get a disposable tent and leave it behind

Please don't do this - it will get jumped on and become another bit of rubbish for the local volunteers to have to clear up. You should see the state of the field after the festival crowds have gone, it's disgusting!

Have the talk about safety; it will make you feel better. But also realise that thousands of people go to festivals every year without issue, and that they are a really important part of growing up - a rite of passage, if you like. It's not the same when you're older!

‘get a disposable tent and leave it behind’

I really hate this with festivals now. There is no such thing as a disposable tent, and someone has to deal with all the tents left behind. It’s awful seeing people just leaving them behind when they could be used time again. It’s so wasteful.

Sunday night/Monday morning does tend to be a bit stupid at reading. Some idiots always start throwing things on fires and generally acting like twats but I went for 8 years and never came to any harm.

I think how your son will cope at reading depends on how sensible he is anyway. But it is safe and there are loads of stewards and first aiders. He’ll have a brilliant time.

I went after my GCSEs. I got up to all sorts. I’m now a perfectly respectable adult.
He won’t camp in the quiet campsite, he will probably drink too much. He will have a great time.
The best thing you can do is let him know that whatever happens, if he is worried about himself or his friends he can call you for help/ advice/ collection at any point with little judgement. He probable won’t need to but knowing that he can is better for him and knowing he will if he needs to has got to be better for you than thinking he might be too worried about your reaction.

I would strongly recommend sending him with a portable charger for his phone, then if things get really hairy he can call. I have done this when my DC have gone to festivals and although they've not had to call home it gives reassurance. (Make sure he backs up his phone before he goes though!!! Just in case it's stolen)
I've noticed that there is a much stronger security prescence than there used to be at festivals now, compared to when I used to go in the 90s. In the campsites there's usually 'towers' with security at the top all night, so they have a good view of the campsite. I've also found security to be more approachable in recent years (though this may be because I look older now, I guess!?)
Re drugs, I've also heard that the police do checks inside tents as well as bags being searched on entering the festival and every time you go into the arena from the camping area.
Make sure he's prepared to spent a fuckton of money on water!! This is one thing he can't afford to scrimp on, though it is tempting as it's so overpriced... Last year I spent £3.50 per small bottle of water as you can't take bottles into the arena and there were hardly any taps. One year everyone I went with got sick from the tap water so maybe best avoided anyway?

My sensible but very music-loving DS went with his friends at post GCSE, around 5 years ago. He came back in one piece, looking fine with all of his belongings and I've never been able to get any information out of him about how things went. He hasn't been to any major music festivals since! (lots of gigs with overnight stays)

Mine all went from 16.. DD1 went 5 years in a row before she felt too old :D
All survived, and I have to say that my DS1 is not the most sensible of lads but even he came home intact..and he went 10 days after having his appendix out!
They were filthy, and the first year DD! caught swine flu and was really unwell when she got home..had to be rushed for the swine flu treatment, but they all loved going. It is a fantastic right of passage.. even if the worry drives you nuts!.

get a disposable tent and leave it behind

Don't be a twat. Do not do this.

Never done Reading but have done plenty of festivals. How is he usually in regards to drink and drugs? I've smoked/smoke weed (outside of festivals) but never had any inclination to even try other stuff, so if he's sensible and has his head screwed on he will most likely be ok. He'll probably have a mad first night, be sick etc.

Do people take rucksacks? Wheelie cases?
Wheelie cases are a PITA to pull across mud. Just a rucksack (a proper hiking one can fit LOADS in, with the straps around waist etc) will do. Clothes in carrier bags incase it rains and the bag gets wet! Has saved me a few times. Bundle up outfits together for quick changes.

Phone and wallet at bottom of sleeping bag when sleeping
Consider swapping for cheap phone
DEFINITELY. You don't get a lot of signal anyway so internet ect is usually useless.

He's a guy so can easily use toilets onsite (troughs for peeing, and IME portaloos aren't that bad if you hold your nose (or have hayfever!) and get in and out!) I never see the point going offsite at a festival as local places push up prices anyway and a local cafe doesn't need 6 teenagers clogging the toilet with massive shits! Like most teenagers they probably wont surface before 11am and will have a mars bar for breakfast lol.

Foldable poncho has always been great for me to stave off showers. and you can whip it off when the sun makes an appearance and it doubles up as something to sit on!

Make sure he takes wellies / boots and proper socks! If he starts getting damp feet, socks on, plastic bag over sock and into wellies, will keep feet dry if his shoes aren't properly watertight.

You've had some great advice and he will have a great time. Although he will probably take too much stuff he will never use, and all of your lovely information will go out of the window. He'll come home bedraggled, hungry, hungover, tired, nauseated, skint, probably lost something but he'll want to do it all over again the next year.

get a disposable tent and leave it behind
Please don't encourage him (or anyone) to do this, tents are not disposable. It's fucking revolting and costs hundreds of thousands to tidy up after festivals. Yes some (very small number and only at certain festivals) will have charities that come in to collect good tents but most end up in landfill! Encourage him to be respectful of his surroundings and keep binbags around to put cans and rubbish straight into (probably not going to work with pissed up teenagers but you can try!). I HATE seeing rubbish at festivals it's grotty and so fucking disrespectful. I've started going to festivals that have very green policies and it's brilliant seeing people actually putting rubbish in bins (and recycle) and the campsites being pristine when packing down. /rant

Its quite a big thing with people going from DS's school, although he is not interested. They had an assembly on this, including a "closed door" session with 6th formers talking to the Y11s, which I suspect was very useful and much more relevant than the teachers doing it. As parents we were sent a really good letter about it, with some top tips and things we might like to consider. I'll see if I can find it. The takeouts I can remember is that the festival itself is very well organised; they know they have a lot of 16-18 year olds there and do a lot to plan around that. Apparently there is a very good website that parents were recommended to have a look at. The big thing that was stressed to us was to talk to our DCs about the importance of sticking together and looking out for each other: that friends keep friends safe.

These are the special biodegradable one weekend only tents, are they? They just turn to compost overnight and sprout wildflowers?

'get a disposable tent and leave it behind'

They have an army of charity volunteers go in afterwards to clear the site of tents, check they're OK & all parts present & functional and bag them up to go off for refugees. So I wouldn't worry unduly about leaving a tent behind, there's far worse places to leave litter.

I would say it is a relatively safe 1st festival to go to. The proximity of town is an advantage.

I'd highly recommend The Cattle Market Cafe for breakfast. It is tucked down Great Knollys Street on the right at the lights just past the railway bridge as you head down Caversham Road into town, opens 6.00am -2pm for a good quality down-to-earth & hearty but non-festival inflated price breakfast &/or lunch, and significantly cheaper/better than most places actually in town. I'm not sure if festival folk have cottoned on to it more recently, but it used to be easily overlooked by festival go-ers in the past.

They have an army of charity volunteers go in afterwards to clear the site of tents, check they're OK & all parts present & functional and bag them up to go off for refugees. So I wouldn't worry unduly about leaving a tent behind, there's far worse places to leave litter

If you do bring your own tent we ask you to please take your it along with any other camping equipment home with you. If you leave it in the field it will most likely end up in landfill or incineration. - Direct from the Reading Festival Website.

Oh forgot this part too

If you want to donate your tent to charity, take it to your local charity shop. Please don’t leave it in the field.

It's not ok to expect volunteers to pick up after you because you're too lazy to pack up a tent or put rubbish in the bin!

Why are people saying avoid the the loos?

Yes they stink and done can be awful but believe it or not the ones in the arena are OK and the portaloos do the the job, it's a festival, he's a teenager, it'll be fine. Honestly it's not some infected hell hole, Jesus wept!

Oh def move to cheap non smart phone, he'll waste his weekend queuing for a charge point unless he's in the paid for camping.