To ask for hand hold re sleep?

[Helpgratefullyreceived]

I’m not sure what I’m looking to achieve with this post...maybe hoping for some inspiration that will help us

Little one nine weeks and the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me. I love being a mum and enjoy pretty much every moment but the lack of sleep is giving me a chronic headache and sickness and this morning feels unbearable.

Baby wakes every 45 mins to 1hr 30 all night, occasionally going 2 hrs once if I’m really lucky. Normally she’s awake for the day at 5 or 6.

I’m struggling to sleep in between settling as I know she’ll be waking up again just after I fall asleep and am listening out for it. I’m working on getting her to nap more in day but these tend to be half hour bursts so sleep not possible for me really. Some nights I think I’m only getting a couple of hours, some nights a bit more.

I worry her sleep isn’t enough for her development but all I can do is help her get to sleep as often as possible.

I’m not sure why she wakes up on each sleep cycle, checked not too hot, cold, fed as much as poss (breastfeeding). She might have wind as pulls her legs up when I pop her in basket, or could have reflux, but she is happy and settled generally.

I know I can do this and I don’t even mind the wake ups and settling etc except that it’s starting to physically hurt and making it difficult to function. Mummy friends have babies waking up through the night but a lot of them seem to sleep for three hour plus stretches which sounds like a dream! I know I’m not the only one though

I don’t know what I want from replies here... maybe similar experiences so I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel? I’ve been avoiding caffeine and painkillers as breastfeeding but might just need a coffee and paracetamol to get through this morning!

Not popular and against guidelines but have you considered sleeping her on her tummy?

I didn't with mine but my friend was having similar issues to yourself and took her mum's advice to flip her D'S over and suddenly had a sleeping baby who only woke for feeds.

I used to thoroughly burp and fart my babies before settling them down to sleep. Infacol was a miracle for any trapped wind.

I'm the nicest way your DH needs to step up. You are not superhuman and your daughter has two parents. He needs to give you time to rest.

I remember getting my first 9 hour stretch when DS1 was small and when I woke I felt a million dollars. My DH slept downstairs with him in his Moses and I slept all night. Bottle fed baby though.

Have yo considered trying to express so your DH can look after baby and not wake you at all for a good stretch?

Totally normal for a breastfed baby to wake that often, but that it makes it any easier for you!

It gets better, I promise. Either that or you just get used to it!

Be kind to yourself, tell DH to pull his weight and try not to stress ❤️

Get a breast pump! DS was the same as you describe, I used to express and let DH take over for a stretch of 4 hours, it was bliss.

We found that putting DS to sleep on his tummy helped with the wind and let him sleep for longer stretches. We used the Angelcare monitor religiously so we'd know if he face-planted and stopped breathing immediately (he never did though!). Maybe try that?

I’d suggest trying a swaddle and a dummy. And echo dinos suggestion - I used to feed DS around 9pm and go to bed, then DH would stay up and give a bottle at 12ish and bring him up asleep. That would often see him through to 2/3am by which time I’d had 5/6 hours sleep. Worked brilliantly.