To be pissed off about Mother’s Day?

[UnderTheDesk]

It’s Mother’s Day today where I live (France). Dd is just gone two, so obviously can’t do anything for it.

When I mentioned it to DP during the week, he said “let’s go out for Sunday lunch then”. Except obviously he didn’t do anything about reserving somewhere, so this morning I suggested going to the local pizza place, which we did.

But that was it. I got no card, no present, no nothing. Not even a bunch of wild flowers or a proper Happy Mother’s Day kiss.

I’m pissed off and disappointed. We’re not much into birthdays, Christmas etc, and don’t have much money, so don’t tend to buy each other things then, but a card or even just some flowers picked from the garden would have done me. Just some acknowledgement.

I was away for Mother’s Day last year, so this didn’t come up then,

You are going to get posters saying,well you are not his mother, but you are right to be hurt by his lack effort however you will need to tell him your expectations. Btw i assumed mothers day was the same all over Europe now I know

I thought the same with dp (my lo is only 8 months) so came up with a great solution and sent myself flowers from the baby. Silly but made me happy and better than getting annoyed by him forgetting. (He predictably did)

My husband forgot my first mother’s day. Asked me in June (after watching an advert for Father’s Day) when mother’s day was, when I told him it had been he went very quiet!

I’m going to do that next year, Gin.

I know, MrsJayy. I thought that pointing it out in advance might spur him to do something, but no. It shouldn’t really matter, I suppose, but I’m just feeling a bit under appreciated in general at the moment,

Don't worry - once your child is at Maternelle, you will get home-made gifts from them every year until the end of primary school....It's a big deal here in France.

When DD was too little to know what Mothering Sunday was OH never bothered either. So we don't bother about father's day either. He doesn't care though. He isn't even bothered about birthdays.

I remember the first Mothering Dunday when DD was about 8 months. I went to church and came back with a bunch of daffodils, and passively aggressively (because I was feeling rather pissed off at that point) said "well at least I got some recongnition of Mothering Sunday at church". OH said "Oh , is it Mothering Sunday then?", completely oblivious of the fact that he I had sent something for his mother.

In OH's case it is just not on his radar, and as a result not on DD's either (she is 17 and ought to know better)

Instead of playing the martyr I just warn them that Mothering Sunday is coming up and I'm not cooking.

Sorry, but Mother’s Day is a perfect excuse/opportunity for ANYONE in the family to recognise and celebrate the act of Mothering. To say it’s only about your own biological mother is just ridiculous.

Mother’s Day has just passed in Australia. I sent cards to my SIL (who is heavily preggers, and starting her mothering journey) and her mother, who has been a lovely ‘step-in’ grandma to my DD when her real grandma can’t be bothered. I also sent a heartfelt text to the handful of women who help me with my mothering, some are themselves child-free and think it’s pretty funny to get it!

Point is, our male partners can certainly be expected to participate. Noone’s expecting diamonds, just a moment of acknowledgement (even if it’s dressed up as ‘from the kid’).