To find it gross that he doesn't brush his teeth before bed?

[bringincrazyback]

Subject line says it all really. DH only brushes his teeth once a day, in the morning. He seems to think I am being a nag when I (tactfully) ask him to brush them at bedtime too, surely most people would understand that quite apart from the dental care issues, there is an issue of breath freshness here? (especially first thing in the morning shudders - morning sex doesn't happen unless he's brushed first, which he seems to find an unreasonable ask, so 9 times out of 10 it just doesn't happen)

He goes through phases of brushing them before bed at my request, but tends to 'stealthily' start leaving it off again when he thinks I've stopped noticing. Like I could not notice when I'm getting gusts of smelly breath in bed at night. I just think it's gross. He's 52 and shouldn't need to be coaxed to brush his teeth.

AIBU to find this a turn-off?

Gusts of smelly breath?

Reading between the lines - you don't seem to like your husband and appear to find him repugnant.

Poor buggar. I feel sorry for him.

Haven't flossed this morning - get yer bastard hands of me!

I don't brush mine before bed, I brush when I get up. I have snacks by the bed so don't see the point!

@userv you feel sorry for him?? Brushing teeth is so important especially at the end of the day I am not surprised it’s a turn off. It’s lazy and disgusting. I wouldn’t want to be kissing etc someone with nasty breath.

It's more important to brush teeth at night than in the morning. All the accumulated dirt just stewing there. Bleurgh.

Ffs why can't adults behave like adults. It's disgusting and hardly respectful towards you and all those around him.

I honestly couldn't stand it. Itd be like being with a child. Having to coax an adult to follow very basic dental hygiene practices is simply not ok.

Hes pathetic.

Doesn't everyone brush their teeth twice a day, morning and night?

Maybe have separate bedrooms if he so revolting? Separate houses even? At least he would be away from your incessant nagging.

Does he brush them twice as in maybe earlier in evening? If so then not so bad. Once a day is poor though.

Yeah maybe he should be brushing before he goes to bed. But I feel SORRY for him because his wife (the OP) sounds like she doesn't like him very much. Her original post is full of disdain and contempt. If you can't see that, I feel sorry for YOUR husbands and partners too.

Smelly breath at night time really doesn’t matter, it’s going to get stinky as hell when you sleep anyway...

But it is basic dental hygiene to brush twice a day and he really should adhere to that if he doesn’t want rotten teeth.

Has he always been like this?

A friend's husband gave up on hygiene shortly after they got married. It started with him brushing his teeth less and less, progressing to never brushing. Then only showering a few times a week, and refusing to even change his underwear more than once a week(!).

She thought he must be depressed and dragged him to counselling but he insisted he was fine, just couldn't be bothered anymore. Didn't give a toss if she thought it was gross. She should just put up with it if she loved him.

She ended up divorcing him after less than two years of marriage. I picture him living like Pigpen from The Peanuts now.

Yes, OP, it is gross. I can't believe people think you're being a "nag" or people actually think it's OK not to brush their teeth at bedtime.

There was a thread like this before and it was surprising how many people admitted to not brushing their teeth. It's disgusting.

Eww at only brushing once a day that's nasty as fuck

Part of the reason I split from dd's df was his unwillingness to have nice breath!!
Fast forward 20 years and he has very few teeth dd tells me.
Not a good look imo.
My dh knows sex would def not be on the cards if he hadn't brushed!!
Gross.

I absolutely would not have sex with or kiss my DP if he hadn't brushed his teeth - it's basic hygiene 😷

Brushing teeth before bed doesn't equal no bad breath overnight though.

It's definitely not recommendable to skip the brushing, but him doing it is no guarantee that you'd get the fresh overnight breath you're after - that's dependant on other factors such as the particular bacteria in your mouth, diet, whether you sleep with your mouth open etc.

Gusts of smelly breath? confused
Reading between the lines - you don't seem to like your husband and appear to find him repugnant.
Poor buggar. sad I feel sorry for him.
Haven't flossed this morning - get yer bastard hands of me! hmm

Try reading the actual lines next time, not between them.
Your 'reading' is entirely wrong - this issue aside, I love and am attracted to my husband. I find the lack of brushing unpleasant, not anything else.

I know it’s not the same thing because I generally do try to brush my teeth twice a day, but sometimes I forget or other times I’m already in bed and can’t be bothered to get back up so I don’t (and for the record, I’ve never had a filling or any work whatsoever). If my DP “reminded” me I’d be quite annoyed because I’m an adult and am responsible for my own teeth brushing.

I brush my teeth right before I go to sleep and I still wake up with minging breath

Op, I’m with you. I would struggle if my oh hadn’t cleaned his teeth. Bleugh !

Gross, if you’re only going brush your teeth once a day then the morning one should be the one you skip. Your mouth gets drier over night and it makes it the prefect breeding ground for bacteria because you lose the protection of your saliva. So much more important to make sure you start off with a clean mouth before you go to bed

No, for me just NOT acceptable. Twice a day. Essential. Can’t believe all the posts where people don’t.

My DH only brushes his at night. It’s gross. He doesn’t shower that often either. He’s confused as to why we rarely have sex these days!

You are meant to brush your teeth at least twice a day. The last being not necessarily just before going to bed (after dinner). My hygienist said that if you are going to have alcohol with dinner then you brush before and then gargle mouthwash before bed. It's not good to brush after alcohol.