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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What is the problem with reins?

201 replies

lucyellensmum · 18/05/2007 12:51

?????

OP posts:
ThomCat · 18/05/2007 20:16

missed you post, thank you for your congrats. No 3 id due 25 Sept

veruccasalt · 18/05/2007 20:17

I think my cat is just cussed. If she thought that I didn't want her to walk on a cat lead, she'd probably trot along with me for miles. Little madam rules the roost at chez Salt .

OrmIrian · 18/05/2007 20:18

I didn't use reins. Have no problem with anyone using them at all. I just didn't mainly because my DS#1 refused to move with them on ...short of dragging him down the road I couldn't have gone anywhere.

But I did cope. And my 2 DS's were runners BTW not the quiet thougtful bookish types I always thought I would have... Don't know if it made any difference long term.

Have to say that I don't think I've ever seen more than a handful of children with them though.

cylonbabe · 18/05/2007 20:19

if i was hsitting down in rl with you lot, i would probly have caved in long ago.
but i stand by my opinion,
none of my children have EVER calmly and quitly walked bymy side holding hands. but i found a way to cope without using reins because i have always flet this way about reins.
i am not judging anyones choices just because i chose not to go down their route. but the op asked about opinions on reins, and i am giving mine. whatever makes life easier is supposed to be the whole point of threads like this?
so stop taking things so personally, everyone.

UCM · 18/05/2007 20:22

CB. Take no notice, it's FRI Day night

nightowl · 18/05/2007 20:23

"choose not to go down that route" what route? the one that makes my child SAFE.

of course, have your opinion. you are worried about image and looks i would think by your post. everyone to their own.

but calling it a canine accessory is insulting.

cylonbabe · 18/05/2007 20:24

tha t was sitting down.

peachy well said. you used what you though appropriate, and sod anyone else.

tc, i'm sorry you find my opinion offensive. i don tbelieve i have used inappropriate language to describe how i feel. i am not discussing anyone's life choices but trying to discuss this in a theoretical way. but this thread is begining to sound a bit liek the breast/bottle ones.
i think we will have to agree to disagree on this.

gess · 18/05/2007 20:25

My 8 year old was on reins earlier (well a belt plus strap- here- the waist belt rein ). He always is when I have ds3 (aged 2. stroppy) with me- or anywhere where I might need control and he might kick off. They've been lifesavers- and allow me to do things like take him to pick up ds3 from nursery (without them I'd have to pay for someone to come in and help me collect ds3, or watch him). I don't really give a monkeys if someone with a cushy number thinks they're some sort of canine accessory. And I'm used to the- what was it?- slack jawed gawpers as well. They have their uses.

gess · 18/05/2007 20:25

My 8 year old was on reins earlier (well a belt plus strap- here- the waist belt rein ). He always is when I have ds3 (aged 2. stroppy) with me- or anywhere where I might need control and he might kick off. They've been lifesavers- and allow me to do things like take him to pick up ds3 from nursery (without them I'd have to pay for someone to come in and help me collect ds3, or watch him). I don't really give a monkeys if someone with a cushy number thinks they're some sort of canine accessory. And I'm used to the- what was it?- slack jawed gawpers as well. They have their uses.

gess · 18/05/2007 20:26

reins have their uses that is - slack jawed gawpers are a PITA.

AitchTwoOh · 18/05/2007 20:26

It surely must make a difference where you live etc, cyclon. i coudln't risk teaching my dd to hold my hand on the street outside our front door.

ThomCat · 18/05/2007 20:26

Cycone - and people would respect your opinion more if you didn't seem to be referring that we treat our DC like dogs by using a rein now and then.

It's absolutley fine if you don't like them. I use mine very rarely but when I do they are incredibly helpful to me. I just think it would be nice if you could respect that I find them useful now and then without bringing up canines as I respect your deciion to never use them.

nightowl · 18/05/2007 20:28

your opinion isnt offensive cylonbabe, your wording is.

cylonbabe · 18/05/2007 20:30

if you knew me in rl nighty, you would never accuse me of being worried about image/style or looks
actually that is really really funny.

i chose not to use reins because i strongly felt that reins were for dogs, not my child. before children i was much more strident in my ideas. after children i mellowed a lot and understand that they do have their uses, and for some people they are a lifline. But for me, well i refused to tie my kids in them. and forced myself to find other ways of controllin gthem.
my ideas my choice.

right, i neeeed to stop discussing this and get on with some housework, have guests coming tomorrow.

gess · 18/05/2007 20:30

I was determined never to use them as well- until ds1 aged 5 legged it out of a shop (twisted out of my hand) and was almost in a very bust main road- I abandonned ds2 and my money in a shop and ran- I only caught ds1 because he turned to laugh at me. One of his therapists told me to get over myself and do what it took to keep him safe- sod the opinions of tjose with no clue of what it was like. est piece of advice she could have given- I ordered them that day.

gess · 18/05/2007 20:33

I can pretty much guarantee you would struggle to find ways of controlling my ds1. although I have booked up 2 people and found an empty field in which to try and teach "stop running and come when name is called" this summer. I'll pay the people who are helping with this- and the people who will be looking anfter ds2 and ds3 whilst we try and teach this. If you have all the answers already then of course would love to hear them and save myself some cash.

cylonbabe · 18/05/2007 20:34

gess, your kids therapist was right, sod what everyone thinks, and tdo whats best for your child.

PeachyChocolateEClair · 18/05/2007 20:45

ooh thanks gess was going to find you and ask for that link! pschic you

Rantmum · 18/05/2007 20:57

I used reins when ds was around a year old , because he was VERY energetic from the start, he started walking at 10 mths and there was no way I could "reason" with a baby.

I don't use them at all anymore(and haven't for months) - ds is now 2yrs 4 mths and knows to hold my hand which is great because he REALLY dislikes going in his buggy.

I know a lot of Mum's rely on buggies for much longer than I was able towhilst out with their toddlers. I would never judge a mother of a child for "strapping her child down" in a buggy to control it when they needed to have hands free for other things , so I think mothers who criticise the use of reins are simply hypocritical.

BandofMothers · 18/05/2007 20:59

I love reins and dd1 still has to wear them when we are out with the pushchair for dd2. She is 3.5 but trips over fresh air (reins have saved her from many a bloody nose and broken teeth) and I don't trust her near roads, there are lots of busy ones near us and in town.

I don't care what anyone else thinks, I would never risk her getting run over just so people didn't think I treated my child like a dog.

REINS ARE GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

veruccasalt · 18/05/2007 22:08

I have to say my dd sustained some of her nastier grazes when she was holding hands with an adult instead of trotting along on reins - on her second day at nursery my mum collected her from nursery for me, got her shoe stuck on the pavement and in the melee somehow cast my dd into the road which grazed her face. Just in time for her first ever school pic .

Another time my sister accompanied us to a swimming class, walking around the corner afterwards, dsis fell flat on her face on a broken paving stone.... again my dd was thrown forwards with the force and this time she managed to bruise her front teeth. If an adult is holding a child's hand, it's not only harder to save yourself but there's also a risk of hurting the child as well.

AitchTwoOh · 18/05/2007 22:24

oh, and for the record twiglett, i don't really think anyone's responding to what you didn't say, don't worry about it.

Original poster
lucyellensmum · 18/05/2007 22:38

Oh my good god, what have i done! heavens, i meant for this thread to be lighthearted.

Twiglett, im sorry that i posted your quote out of context, i actually knew you were joking and quoting. Ooops, lucyellens mum writhes around the floor with both feet in mouth AGAIN Seriously though twigs, i didnt mean to offend you.

OP posts:
Original poster
lucyellensmum · 18/05/2007 22:42

cyclon babe - whats good enough for my dog, is good enough for my daughter. Why is it more important to stop our dogs from getting run over should they stray onto the road, than it is our babies?

OP posts:
FirstAtForty · 18/05/2007 22:49

lucyellensmum - tee hee, can't fault that logic