What is the problem with reins?

[lucyellensmum]

?????

If you are very small, and mummy or daddy is tall then holding hands with your arm up in the air is uncomfortable, and affects the balance of young children.

Anyway if the kid is on reins they have both hands free to carry the heaviest shopping

kitty - I mean when you have one child in a pram, the other walking

Seen then in John Lewis but bought mine online from some outdoorsy type place, called Ltlle Life Toddler Daypack IIRC

yeah right kitty, just hold their hands, its that simple! I'll stick with the reins, although i must admit i have on more than one occasion heard myself telling DD to "walk on"!!!! yes, in that rather high pitched horsey voice too

I like the idea of a strap to the backpack - but unfortunately dd1 won't wear a backpack!

opps little life, sorry

nothing at all
ds was a bolter so reins were used as a last resort if he didn't hold my hand nicely the reins went on
dd was always falling over,walk 50 yards and she's be flat on her face screaming so she had a "dog" harness one they saved her a lot of grazed knees

They're not attractive (dd had a pink princess one ) but safety IMO is more important than snotty looks

Reins aren't chavvy, walking off with your mates and leaving your 2 year old trying to fish conkers out of the gutter 200 yards behind you is chavvy.

The only people I have ever met who object to reins have compliant children. They say things like "Oh you may think she's good all the time, but she's not! We went into a toy shop yesterday and she wouldn't stop touching, even though I told her several times not to, and she cried when we left!"

MMmmm, your child is a real challange, I can see.

colditz - also people who don't walk anywhere with their children object to the use of reins.

with reference as to when you start teaching your child to hold hands, this can still be an ongoing thing whilst using the reins. When you're walking alongside a busy road, pushing the pushchair which DS refuses to sit in at certain times and wants to have a go at walking himself (he's 2), what's safer? Dead child who has slipped from hand and ran onto busy road or safe child on reins, pretending he's galloping like a pony and having great fun. Why risk the safety of your child?
At the moment, I let DS out of the pushchair for short bursts and then when we're not near roads, he's allowed to walk holding my hand. If he tried to take his hand away, I tell he'll go back into the pushchair and he gives in.

For those who don't use reins, what would you do with a runner at the super market checkout? Or indeed any shop? Or an icecream van? Or a cashpoint?

Ds1 was such that if I let go of him for even a second, like to hitch up my jeans, he was off, he was running, and he was like this until 3.5, so pushchair not an option - he certainly did not need to be conserving his energy!

MM. people with cars.

I don't have a car, and without reins, ds1 would be dead. Fact. I would have had to give ds2 up for adoption, I couldn't have ever taken both of them out.

I think that reins, although few will admit this, have poor single mother connotations, as they are the group least likely to have physical help in the form of another person, and the group least likely to have a car, and therefore have to walk everywear. People say chav, but they don't mean be-capped male youths in white trackies really, they mean mums with small kids, who are on their own with them.

I remember wearing reins as a small child, we lived in a busy city so it seemed to make sense. I was also very disciplined as a child (strict mummy ) and I'm fairly sure I didn't go mad and run into the road the moment I was let off the leash, so to speak! I think the reins can help reinforce the message that it isn't safe just to go wondering off where you please when you're near roads.

I used reins a few times with dd but got fed up of the nasty comments and dirty looks we got. We live in Germany and reins are really frowned upon here. I did insist on them at the airport though, and on the ferry especially after ds was born.

I am having problems with ds at the moment as he doesn't want to take my hand to cross the road.

Just laughing, he has just come downstairs after his nap. He has got himself dressed, has his trousers on back to front and 2 tshirts on. Bless!

Can I just make a point I know Ive made on MN before.

Reins are not just for walking along the road, they are to keep children safe everywhere.

My younger brother refused to use them I think his comment was 'My child is not a dog'
Brother is a policeman.

Two weeks after Jamie Bulger went missing, Brother was shopping with Nephew in a large shopping centre in Swindon, child held hands nicely like he had been taught. They choose what the want and go top the checkout, while Brother was paying, 2 year old Nephew was distracted by something, Brother pays looks down Child GONE, he was missing 2 hours before found.

And they stupid idiot still wouldn't put him on reins, he lost him for 10 mins at a market not long after. I really cant believe people still wont use reins.

Agree with firstatforty - I too was on reins as a back up as my mum was well strict and I'd never have dared run off but I guess she needed them as a deterrant. It worked. I was an angel!!!

it's far healthier for a child to walk with reins on then to be pushed around in a pushchair. A pushchair is really heavy with a three year old in it.

There is nothing wrong with reins for me! I live on a very busy main road where most people speed and there are no pedestrian crossings. safety is imortant to me. I also live next to a river.

We use a teletubbies bum bag with a wrist strap attached, and as he loves the teletubbies he doesn't mind wearing it! When we are by the road he also has to hold my hand as well as the strap.

I reguarly take ds for a walk by the river and I do sometimes use the wrist strap to keep him close.
He is only 2 and I don't think he has the ability to know how to behave by a river bank just yet. However I did take him out to the river this morning and I barely used the strap. He has 'good and bad days' when he is not in the pushchair.

IMO it probably depends where you live, your surroundings, how much time lo spends walking (or confined to the buggy).

I used reins with ds1 because he accepted the reins happily but hated holding hands (and this was at the stage where I was pg again and couldn't carry him far). TBH, holding hands must be uncomfortable for them. ds1 is a runner so I had no choice - he would never have walked safely just holding the pushchair for example, he would have shot off at full speed. So reins were the only safe option. BTW when I say he wouldn't hold hands, he would just wriggle his way out of my grip and then shoot off repeatedly - it just wasn't safe and not good for my stress levels.

ds2 is a completely different matter. He hates reins but will happily walk along holding hands or holding on to the pushchair.

I would just use whatever method works best for you and to hell with what anyone else thinks, safety is paramount!

ooooh, i love our reins. dd has them on a lot, but we don't use them, iykwim? but they're so handy to grab if big kids are about to mow her down in a park or museum and on the street i'll be holding her hand anyway but also have the reins round my thumb in case she runs away. she's only 16 months old so we don't walk far but the cars round here are mental and i'm taking no chances... i do get a few disapproving looks but who cares. i see the logic of Just Holding The Hand but it's too risky round here and she's so fast when she gets going.

macmama - it's the same attitude in Belgium. It's also relatively uncommon to see other safety devices such as stair gates and fire guards.

I had reins for ds, he was a bolter and a total total nightmare. I used to put one leg through the reins when I was paying for things etc . I did hold his hand too but he was a total nightmare and the reins kept him safe at a point where I was trying to encourage him to walk more (and use the pushchair less).

DD is an entirely different creature. You can 'just hold her hand', no bother. Yes, sometimes she wriggles and struggles a bit, but it is nothing like ds was. If I'd had her first I might have been sniffy about reins too.

@belgo
we have stairguards, that seems ok here. But you get funny looks from some folk when you admit to having a playpen. They call it baby prison. But I'd rather my dc is in a playpen than falling downstairs or getting burnt on the cooker.

I find the wrist strap better for ds because we both have the strap around our wrists and we do mostly hold hands but when he runs off he can't go far. I use it more as a back up.

Although I have funny looks I have also had approving comments (mainly from the older generation).Most poeple keep their children in pram far too long IMO hence folk are not used to seeing toddlers getting around under their own steam

Never used them. I will admit to trying them with my eldest (but only because mum bought them) but her refused to walk in them. My eldest and youngest kids were real runners - I had to keep an eye on them all the time but it was OK. They have not been run over/abducted/lost. It is possible to manage without them. I do give them leeway to wander and look at things (on the pavement) but I am always aware of where they are.

I wasn't aware that there was a general dislike of them although I suppose you don't see that many.