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Original poster

Why on Earth did she have to be a horrible cow? (work colleague)

28 replies

MilkyCoffeeAndSkinnySyrup · 22/05/2018 08:38

I work with a team leader from work, and we get on fine! Just normal colleague relationship. Anyway, she only lives up the road from me and I drive to work. I saw her walking (she would've got to work late cos I was running a bit late), so I stopped next to her and asked if she'd like a lift? She said OK and then dropped her off.

When we got out the car, she told me to go in first because she's going to go somewhere for a minute so that people don't see us together...? Not even a thank you. We're both female, both married! So can't be "that" reason? I feel like a right dick. I dropped this woman off and she treated me like she was embarrassed that she got into the car with me! I felt bad she had to walk quite far that's why I picked her up!

She didn't utter a word to me all day after that, in fact she kept being picky about what I'm doing and basically giving me more chores to do! Angry Why am I too nice for my own good? Someone else posted a thread about why people are basically piss takers, and this has just let me vented it out! Sorry for ranting and raving... I just wish I wasn't treated like a piece of shit all the time.

OP posts:
troodiedoo · 22/05/2018 08:41

How very strange!

DontDrinkDontSmoke · 22/05/2018 08:42

Well you know what to do next time you see her running late.

If it’s raining and there’s a big puddle on the roadside near her, don’t speed up and drive through it as that would be very wrong, very wrong indeed Grin

hildabaker · 22/05/2018 08:43

I think I see why she did it, but , to me, she has mishandled the situation. I imagine she did it because she has to manage you and she didn't somehow want you to think that you two were mates now, and she was worried that perhaps you would become difficult to manage, e.g. wanting her to 'let you off' things at work, etc.
Has she been long at her post? strikes me she must lack confidence in her role but yes YANBU and yes she was rude.

Rainydaydog · 22/05/2018 08:44

I don't think you were being too nice for your own good by picking her up. It's just a normal considerate thing to do. The TL is weird acting like she can't be seen to be friendly with any of her team. Just learn that she is a bit batshit and don't let it get to you.

veggiethrower · 22/05/2018 08:45

Maybe she didn't want others to see as she is your team leader and wouldn't want accusations of favoritism or some other bizarre reason.
Maybe team leaders have been told not to "fraternize" with the members of the team outside of work. Could it be something like that?

It's rude though and I wouldn't give her a lift again.

UserV · 22/05/2018 08:47

For fuck's sake, if this woman is 'above' the OP in rank, and didn't want to cause any issues by being seen to be getting a lift off a 'menial' then she should have refused the fucking lift!

Ungrateful, stuck-up bint!

OP, don't sweat it, don't speak to her unless you have to, and never ever offer her a lift again.

AnneProtheroe · 22/05/2018 08:48

Think I would have gone in and said "xyz is on her way, she just had something to do after I gave her a lift" Wink

No matter how much you she tries to hide things someone always sees. And it looks worse for trying to hide. Even if it's just about a lift to work!

FuckPants · 22/05/2018 08:50

I'd never offer her a lift again.

If you drive past her when it is raining, toot your horn and give her a cheery wave as you drive past her.

UserV · 22/05/2018 08:52

I used to walk to work (25-30 minutes) and the office manager would always pass me and wave (and I didn't mind as I actively chose to walk and made that clear to everyone.) However, on the occasions it was pissing down really hard, he would pull over and give me a lift, and we would both walk in together, and I'd say 'thanks Paul, appreciate it!' and he would say 'no worries Vicky!'

No sneaking around trying to hide the fact that he has given me a lift. It would have looked as if something was going on then. This woman sounds like a stuck up twit who is up her own arse.

spookytime · 22/05/2018 08:52

Perhaps she was embarrassed, her being above you and all... Hmm

If so she ought to get over herself a bit!

LaurieMarlow · 22/05/2018 08:58

God how weird. I'm not sure I could work with someone like that.

Well she won't be getting anymore lifts, that's for sure.

JamieVardysHavingAParty · 22/05/2018 08:59

I would wonder if she has a jealous spouse who gets funny about her having friends.

Deshasafraisy · 22/05/2018 09:00

You did the right thing, she acted like a dick. Don’t feel bad about anything, the problem is hers. Ignore it and if anything have a secret giggle at her awkwardness.

bazingabazinga · 22/05/2018 09:01

I’d call her on it.

I have no time for that shit. She’s a bloody team leader, who does she think she is? 😂

JamieVardysHavingAParty · 22/05/2018 09:02

I don't think you both being female and married would rule the above out, by the way.

I always remember a bloke who posted on MN (!) for validation who accused his girlfriend of having had a threesome in the afternoon after her married female friend and spouse visited at the house.

emmyrose2000 · 22/05/2018 09:10

Not even a thank you
I don't care what her reason is, she's utterly rude. There's no way I'd be giving her a lift again.

If she was worried about being see with an employee she manages, then she shouldn't have accepted the lift in the first place.

Mountainsoutofmolehills · 22/05/2018 09:11

You did a nice thing. I am sorry you feel bad and embarrassed, I would. It wasn't nice. time don't bother picking her up, just say 'oh I saw you earlier walking in the rain, but I know you don't want to be seen with me so I thought you'd prefer to walk than be shamed'......

SarfE4sticated · 22/05/2018 09:12

I hate the attitude of people being in higher up jobs being better than someone else. They might get paid more, or have more responsibility, but they aren't 'better' than the person who sweeps the floor. It's just a job and has no bearing on your value as a human being.

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 22/05/2018 09:18

She's a weirdo! Nobody would think anything of you giving her a lift, unless they see her lurking around pretending you didn't arrive together, in which case they will definitely wonder what's up!

Let it go, but next time pretend you don't see her walking.

9amTrain · 22/05/2018 09:23

Wow, cunt.

UserV · 22/05/2018 09:38

@SarfE4sticated

I hate the attitude of people being in higher up jobs being better than someone else. They might get paid more, or have more responsibility, but they aren't 'better' than the person who sweeps the floor. It's just a job and has no bearing on your value as a human being.

EXACTLY! Obviously people who are well educated, and who have worked their way up a company and risen through the ranks deserve a certain amount of respect, but they are still no more worthy as a human being than someone who took 3 GCSE's, failed them all, and sweeps the floors.

Anyone who acts like they are above others to the point where they snub them, and don't want to be seen with them, is, as @9amtrain says, a cunt.

MereDintofPandiculation · 22/05/2018 09:51

•If it’s raining and there’s a big puddle on the roadside near her, don’t speed up and drive through it as that would be very wrong, very wrong indeed* and also against the law, so would rebound horribly if she reported you to the police.

PlumsGalore · 22/05/2018 09:51

hildabaker has it.

She was also picky that day just to reinforce boundaries and remind you of your place.

In future, you know you will be driving on by.....well I would!

MrsCrabbyTree · 22/05/2018 09:56

You could call her on it, but that could make matters worse.

You could ignore next time you see her walking, but that could make matters worse.

Your only option is to move to a home in the opposite direction. GrinGrin

Emmasmum2013 · 22/05/2018 09:57

OP you did a good thing. The world needs more people like you. Please don't let it put you off doing nice things for people in the future.
Just maybe not her since she obviously doesn't appreciate it. Can't believe she didn't even say thank you!! That's appalling.

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