To consider quitting my reasonably well paid job because the people are toxic?

[BrewDoggy]

I started a new career a few years ago, and have been very fortunate. I was recruited into a company and have gotten above average salary for where I live. I do appreciate my circumstance and my luck.
The downside is, the more I stay with the current company, the more I realise how cut throat and horrible the people are.
The people who made it to the top/management positions are not nice people with very little integrity. I have been quite disillusioned with my boss especially, I used to like him a lot as a boss. I do benefit him because I work hard, put extra hours and get things done.
However, I am miserable because I feel it is a toxic place. The nicer people I bonded with have all left or pushed out.
The problem is I am paid above market value, so if I leave, I will struggle to find another job that will pay me as much. I will probably lose 20% of my current salary and at the moment work is only 25 minutes away from home. I'm in a dilemma whether to stay or go. I can't ignore the toxic atmosphere and turn a blind eye on unfairness and the daily bitching. I realise I am quite unhappy and miserable but I keep talking myself out of leaving so far because I know the grass is not always greener on the other side. Would you suck it up or would you leave?

I worked in a place where they paid above market value BECAUSE they knew it was a toxic workplace and no one would stay otherwise. The damage to my mental health was not worth it.

It depends on a lot of things: your circumstances, whether you have any alternative financial support, your ability to tolerate the toxic environment etc.

You don't say whether you are a lone parent or have a DH/DP who contributes to the family pot, for example. If you are not the sole breadwinner and the environment is really getting you down then it may be worth taking a salary cut for a better quality of life. You'd have to make some sacrifices but it may be better for your overall wellbeing.

You say you'd probably lose 20% of your salary if you move, but how much research have you done into this or is this just supposition? Could you move into an adjacent career and keep your income at or near what you're on now? Would you be able to take some courses or anything to make you more employable? If, for example, you were able to stick this job out for another year but do a course in that time, you might be able to see the wood for the trees...

If you can afford the drop in salary then definitely make the move. Extra cash isn’t worth it for the damage done to your mental health and overall well-being!

I'm about to leave a well paid job because of my toxic boss, life's too short

It depends if you can compartmentalise it

If you work in a smaller sub team it’s easier to just get in and get out and keep your head down.

Long term I’d struggle with that (as I suspect would most people)

assuming you are a “chocolate teapot maker” Can you not just apply for a “snr chocolate teapot maker” job somewhere else. that should cover the pay difference ?

I work somewhere like this but they actually pay below market value because they have zero competition in the area. I am looking for another job, but for the time being I just go in, do my basic job and ignore all other requests for extra work that I'm not qualified for. Don't get involved with the politics side of work, just ignore them all, do your paid for hours no overtime and get the hell out of there.

I was in the same boat until very recently. The most negative and toxic environment I have ever worked in but local, part time and excellent pay. On paper it was the most amazing job. I was lonely, unsupported, bored and working for a horrible boss. I start my new local and part time job soon but with a massive pay cut. Like other people have said, life is too short.

That’s a great reason for moving jobs & taking a salary cut. Don’t beat yourself up worrying that a toxic environment is not reason enough to leave. If you can tolerate it then enjoy the extra cash, if not then get out and put your hard work into a place & team that are worth investing in.

I also worked in a place with a similar atmosphere. It wasn't worth it for me. I quit. I'm much happier now, even if I am paid less.

I left. Worked in investment banking. Pack of arseholes. degrading behaviour. Unethical treatment of clients. Lots of illegal/dodgy stuff. Par for the course, and expected for the $ but sickening. The whole industry is disgusting, you basically can't be successful in it without being a shithead. Make a fraction of what I used to, teaching, and couldn't be happier.

I joined a company, five minute drive or 30 minute walk, shorter working hours, excellent salary.

As soon as I got there, I realised how toxic it was, never walked as never had the time to, shorter working hours never happened as the pressure was immense so hours of unpaid overtime, got loads of bonuses effectively buying me to stay there.

I left for a poorer paid job, but much better off mentally!

Money really isn't everything.

The company I left has a huge staff turnover, it's in a very close industry and they now cannot recruit staff! The salary they are offering now is probably about 50% over market average..... but why???

You will have to do the maths versus quality of life. I worked in a similar environment, totally toxic and felt trapped. When I did finally leave a massive weight lifted, my health improved (I never even recognised I wasn't well!) and I haven't looked back.

This is a tough one for you but I would think about leaving. If your managers are toxic, they will ask you to do something unethical at some point. If you do it you compromise your principles/integrity and risk damage to your relationships with others. If you don’t do it they’ll find a way to push you out or at least make life horribly difficult.
I had a (perhaps) similar situation in education with two toxic managers, and ended up rather gratefully grabbing hold of redundancy. My salary has dropped a bit since but I knew I couldn’t work with them anymore. The only thing is that within months both of them had been ousted. But it’s a bit hard to predict if/when justice might happen, especially if quite a few people are involved and the actual culture is toxic. Not a nice situation for you to be in. Good luck.

If you can afford to take the cut, do it. I worked in a very toxic environment for eight years age 22-30. It was a five minute drive from home and I was earning 25% -
possibly more - more than I would have doing the same job anywhere else.

What I found, to my shame, is that it actually did start to change me after a while. I got worn down fighting against it. Years on from leaving I can see it. I'm glad to say I didn't behave in the same way as some of the people I worked with but I did feel my moral compass shift a bit and in the end I found myself frequently doing things I wasn't entirely happy with. I was young at the beginning and it's easy to be influenced when you only really know that environment.

I was on the cusp of leaving when I was offered VR which I took without a second thought. Got a nice payout, and went to work elsewhere until I had my children. The difference in my stress levels were enormous looking back now I can't believe I didn't leave sooner.

thing is, another job in another company may not be any better people and environment wise. If you can pull away fro all the crap, it may be worth staying.
I think so many jobs these days are full of people who would do anything to get to the 'top'

Toxic is an overused word, but if you genuinely work with people like that, it's also quite accurate - they poison the workplace, and they can damage your career if you carry on working with them.
This doesn't just mean people you don't like, or who have character traits you don't warm to in the workplace. For me it's people who absolutely don't care about anyone beyond themselves, and will become irrational and vindictive if challenged. They also know who to get on side at any given time to protect themselves and make sure other people appear to be at fault for any problems. If they have power, they'll use it against you. If OP's colleagues are like that (don't know, obvs), I think the answer is to think (not necessarily urgently) about looking for an exit. Hard one though, because as PP says, who's to know what things are like elsewhere?

can you make clubs, interests and life outside worth it? SOunds like you've already thought this through. Start applying for a new job, the smell of freedom will make the suffering copable. Like spending years with a terrible partner, terrible jobs and bosses is a waste of time, unless their is a goal insight that makes it worth it. Good luck comrade.

Bless you OP I'm in the same boat. People did warn me what this company was like before I started but didn't quite realise... It isn't just too each other but how they try all these "schemes" on clients too. Feels like I am working on the Death Star.

Can you apply for a team further away from the top? In my experience of toxic workplaces (I currrently work in one) the further you are from the CEO the less toxic it is.

further you are from the CEO the less toxic

... ah yeah well this makes sense... my desk is next to his office

I agree that an environment like that leaves it's mark on you.

Having worked somewhere very similar, I would recommend leaving. Behaviour like that is catching. For me, it became almost like an abusive relationship, where I couldn't stay and I couldn't leave. It ruined my self-confidence for a while. In the end they pushed me out, and I am glad they did.

For me it's people who absolutely don't care about anyone beyond themselves, and will become irrational and vindictive if challenged. They also know who to get on side at any given time to protect themselves and make sure other people appear to be at fault for any problems. If they have power, they'll use it against you

^ Nailed it. I have the misfortune of working in a toxic team just now and one of the main problem colleagues is a narcissistic male who is described 100% as above.

I'm applying for other jobs. Leave if you can, you don't want to ever become like them. I think there's a danger in these types of workplaces that you become desensitised to the toxicity and it becomes normal.

In my experience, the whole business was 'toxic'. Not always the case I know. That shit generally rolls downhill. For me it was an attitude and outlook that started with the top and was felt right to the bottom. We had call centre staff fully briefed on what you could get away with.

Compliance? Well, we'll do what we have to, the bare minimum not to get in trouble with the regulator. In a business where the compliance team is nicknamed 'the anti-business team' it's hard to do your job well - or properly. Luckily enough for me, they knew so little about what was needed that I managed to get myself sent on decent external courses because they just didn't care enough to check what I was asking for and so I learned that was I was being asked to do/sign off on wasn't right. I got properly qualified and was on my way once I realised fully that there was nothing I could do to fix the mess, because as long as they made money they simply didn't give a shit. I was a tick box exercise and a potential scapegoat, nothing more.

Funnily enough, they're no longer trading.

DH works as well but I earn more than him. His job is not that secure either. I'm sorry to hear some PPs have experienced it too, it sucks doesn't it? You'd think people could work professionally and maintain some integrity and kindness.