Childminder taking the piss?

[AuroraFloyd]

Since we started using her 9 months ago, our childminder has let us down at short notice at least once per month. Often more.

I feel terrible because she's obviously had a shit year - everything from regular illness to unexpected severe injury, death of a family member, marriage breakdown and now another hospital visit.

She's great and I love her as do my kids but I just can't rely on her. Dh and I can't keep taking time off this often!

That sounds very flakey. Makes me pleased to have opted for nursery.

I think that’s a risk of using a childminder unfortunately.

So she's been ill, injured, suffered a bereavement and a marriage breakdown and you want to know if she's taking the piss?! Really?

I don’t think she is taking the piss but that’s all part and parcel of using a childminder.

I don't think she's taking the piss but it sounds like she's had a run of terribly bad luck that has, sadly, affected her business in terms of reliability. I'm sure that she would rather have been open as normal during this time.

Your options are clear. Stay with her and hope that things will improve from here on in or give her whatever notice period is stated on your contract and start looking at alternatives childcare.

Our cylinder has had times where she has been unreliable however, she is great with the boys and we have been with her for a long time. Other people who use cm seem to have the same issues. When I used a nursery , it was far more reliable but less flexible. You need to decide what is best for your family

We had a similar bad patch with our childminder. She was wonderful, but suffered family illness, a health scare of her own, a bereavement, a burglary and a (not in any way her fault) car accident within about 6 months. We rode it out with a lot of help from grandparents and a bit of unpaid leave because we loved her, DD loved her, and none of it was down to her being flakey, it was just a really, really shit time in her life. If we hadn't had the flexibility we have, we would have had to move DD to nursery. Aside from that period of time, though, she had one unplanned day off in over 3 years, and that was for D&V so again, absolutely couldn't be helped, and is an occupational hazard of having and working with kids. Considering she has her own young kids, we were lucky it wasn't more.

I think its a bit harsh to say she's "taking the piss". I've had several of these things happen to me in the past few years and yes, they can impact your reliability.

You would be within your rights to conclude that you can't rely on her and, if it doesn't work for you and your family, to choose an alternative childminder. That's the reality of a free market and she has to live with that.

But if those things have genuinely happened to her (and there's nothing to suggest otherwise), then she's hardly taking the piss, she's struggling to deal with some stuff life has thrown at her.

The way I've dealt with this in my situation is to overcompensate in areas where I can: i.e. I know my ability to guarantee I can be in the office all the time is compromised due to my daughter having a chronic health problem. I try to make sure I make up the time after hours and when I have to work from home I really work from home.

In your situation its a bit of a starker choice as her physical ability to be there is fundamental to her ability to do the job, so I can see its difficult for you and you may have to make a difficult choice. But at least try to be compassionate enough to recognise that its not her fault.

@missmapp what sort of cylinder do you have that looks after your kids?!

I wouldnt say she is taking the piss, things unfortunately happen

I would stick with her if she is otherwise good, however it is funny that when people post about employers being strict in respect of staff sickness you get people saying "well 4 occasions in a year I say a lot etc etc" Even when the poster has been v poorly or had good cause to be away from work, whereas the childminder here has sympathy.

I’m a nanny and I’m lucky enough to have cover, and I’ve also worked as a childminder’s assistant. She’s probably stressed out of her mind and also worrying you’re going to leave - this is the problem with being a self employed service provider, it all rests on you. She’s had a horrible run of bad luck that has impacted on her ability to provide a consistent service and I’m sure she knows this and is preparing to take a hit in children leaving. Ultimately you have to think of what’s best for you and what you can realistically deal with.

Find a new childminder if you can.

My son has been with his CM for almost three years and she’s never been off sick. The only thing she’s asked me to do is pick my son up a bit earlier one day as she had to pick up her husband from a day surgery unit and she only charged me a half day for the inconvenience.

In short, she’s bloody brilliant.

Yeah she's not taking the piss from what you've written. I can understand it must be very stressful for you - if you're struggling to cover this stuff then I don't think you could be blamed for looking for alternative childcare. I feel sorry for her and you to be honest!

Bazingabazinga

Well done you for finding a childminder that has not had a recent bereavement, illness or marriage breakdown. 🙄

😂😂😂

Wow why the bitterness? @ditheringblidiot

It’s not bitterness. It’s an accurate response. Nobody knows what’s around the corner.

I’d find other arrangements. She’s not reliable enough and has to much going on in her own life to do her job properly at this time.

@bazingabazinga. Not bitterness, just pointing out how stupid your comment was.