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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have lost hope of losing weight

85 replies

somesetmeadow · 19/05/2018 07:39

I have always had a tendency to lean towards plumpness. I put on a bit of weight in my early teens but lost it at 15/16.

I then out on a shitload of weight at university but lost it afterwards and maintained a reasonable weight after that although it was a battle.

But somehow the last three years and I’ve lost it. I’m 14 stone and at my height that’s big! I stick to a diet really well and then lose the plot and binge eat Pringles and chocolate and cake. I do exercise but it’s not enough to counter the amount of crap I know I’m eating.

Has anyone been in this position?

OP posts:
Original poster
somesetmeadow · 19/05/2018 08:13

I do exercise but to be honest I can put away 3000 calories in a binge. Easily Blush

I’m not religious at all, but thanks.

OP posts:
PollyPelargonium52 · 19/05/2018 08:17

I am going to try Slimfast but not until my menopause supplements have fully kicked in as that has a bearing too It can be hard to lose the weight owing to hormonal changes.

Somebody I know swore by the Slimfast diet. They had two drinks daytimes and a normal meal evenings.

ragged · 19/05/2018 08:17

Do you think OA is about religion? I'm a raging humanist & I went to OA.
There are other self-help groups. The thrust of OA approach is to admit you need help, can't sort this problem on your own, it's bigger than you, but you want to take responsibility for having it nonetheless. I guess this thread is a start for all that.

jigglepiggle · 19/05/2018 08:19

I second teamRH

boilerhouse2007 · 19/05/2018 08:20

Yep i know exactly where you are and it is very tough. When you say you stick to the diet very well then go off the rails could be where you go wrong. For instance-when you eat well do you deprive yourself of treats? This is what can cause diets to fail or do you have the nothing or all mentality whereby if you eat a crisp you think i have ruined my diet now, i'll eat for 2 days straight...

It's how you react to stress too. life is stressful and often downright horrible but how do you react to it? Is your reaction to a bad situation to go straight to burger king?

Original poster
somesetmeadow · 19/05/2018 08:21

Your first paragraph is spot on boiler and I know it’s ridiculous!

I do eat emotionally but it’s linked more to tiredness than anything else, I think, and boredom.

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 19/05/2018 08:23

I do eat emotionally but it’s linked more to tiredness than anything else, I think, and boredom.

I’m the same. I found meal planning and batch cooking healthy stuff to fill the freezer helped. It took away the “I can’t be bothered to cook so I’ll eat crap” excuse because there was something ready in the freezer and written on a plan so I didn’t even need to think about it.

cherrytrees123 · 19/05/2018 08:24

Could someone explain the principles of the blood sugar diet? I don't want to commit large amounts of money if I don't know what's involved? I looked at the website ,but it doesn't really explain what's involved.

AjasLipstick · 19/05/2018 08:26

Op... a little of what you fancy.

My friend's like you...she'll eat nothing but veg soup and nuts and lean meat for weeks and then have a solid fortnight full of lattes, chocolate and chips.

I am slim...and eat a generally healthy diet but will eat a small packet of crisps every few days....small bar of choc about twice a week.

No point denying yourself EVERYTHING.

Original poster
somesetmeadow · 19/05/2018 08:26

The problem is, a little of what I fancy doesn’t work, seriously.

I’m like a shark who sniffs blood.

OP posts:
manicinsomniac · 19/05/2018 08:26

When you are dieting, is it too restrictive? If you are eating under 1000 calories or so in a day then, for most people, it is not sustainable. Your body isn't getting what it needs so your mind rebels and you become very vulnerable to bingeing on huge amounts of what you've been denying yourself (which tends to mean you crave high sugar, high fat crap). That's not a very scientific way of explaining it but hopefully you get what I mean.

If, instead of that, you ate 1500 calories consistently then you would still lose weight but you'd be able to plan enough protein, fat and even 'treats' (whatever it is you crave most) to keep you satiated and not lead to that 'oh but I've been so good for so long and it's killing me so I need to binge' kind of reaction.

PurpleDaisies · 19/05/2018 08:28

The problem is, a little of what I fancy doesn’t work, seriously.

I’m the same. I have to not have crisps in the house or I eat them. I have about a packet a week when I’m out in a coffee shop so I’m not tempted to go back and buy more.

boilerhouse2007 · 19/05/2018 08:31

yep op, it is not ridiculous and what you describe is very common, you are a perfectionist and have unrealistic expectations. Believe me, i have being mates with many ppl with the perfect body and often these ppl do NOT get through this through hard dieting. Illegal substances play a big part here for many.

You need to design a diet that allows treats and allow forgiveness, if you eat a mars bar then move on-do not turn it into a binge, change your mentality. Restrictive diets bare not sustainable in the long run.

blessedbe · 19/05/2018 08:32

I’ve just done a DietBet and lost just over 8lb last month. I’ve been training pretty hard for an event but wasn’t shifting much weight and doing a bet made me more aware of what I was eating. MyFitnessPal is great for understanding where you can cut back. I’ve made small changes, like instead of two slices of buttered toast for breakfast, I’m having one slice and a bit of yogurt instead, and I’m more mindful of drinking water. Portion size is a huge thing, for me.

The pp who said about it being a lifestyle change, not a diet, was spot on though. You need to be mindful about your choices, and find something that works for you (I would never be able to do the no sugar diet forever more!).

Original poster
somesetmeadow · 19/05/2018 08:35

I could be tempted by illegal substances if I knew where to access them! Grin

OP posts:
Shambu · 19/05/2018 08:37

I think you're BU to think you could never conquer your weight issues. But I think you need to admit to yourself this is addiction/binge eating and get treatment for it.

It's all very well to say "it’s linked more to tiredness than anything else, I think, and boredom"

But when I'm tired and bored I don't eat large quantities of food. It's because you're addicted to food that you do this.

PeppermintPasty · 19/05/2018 08:38

I agree about being too strict about not having stuff when you fancy it. Many many years ago I suffered with bulimia, and one of the ways I got it under control was the counter intuitive thing of having dangerous binge foods in the house. I used to ban them entirely from my life, then go crazy and binge like mad.

I came to understand that for me, keeping some of those foods in and having some of them when I wanted them totally took the pressure off. I ended up not being bothered at all.

I know bulimia is an extreme example, just trying to show the psychological tricks which helped me.

The real thing that works for me now is short sharp bursts of exercise. How old are you? I'm 50 in a few months and I'm the fittest I've ever been thanks to HIIT and I would heartily recommend it. It shreds you, quite frankly, like nothing else in my experience. It's hard, and when I first started it I had to sit down halfway through a ten minute routine! But in less than two weeks my fitness had improved radically.

I also do weights (at home) and strengthening my core muscles has also helped.

DianaT1969 · 19/05/2018 08:39

If you allow yourself half a tub of ice cream on Saturday after a week of eating healthy, you’re a lot less likely to go “screw it” and binge on everything in sight.

Whilst I think it's good advice, not to go on such a resticted diet that you feel deprived, I also know from personal experience that eating sweet stuff, pastries etc just makes me crave more, not less. Due to the change it causes in my blood sugar levels/insulin release.

That's why lots of people recommend Dr Michael Mosley's blood sugar diet (informative website with free recipies or download the book). I also recommend changing to a low carb lifestyle because you can eat well, not feel hungry and it feels more sustainable to me than low calorie diets.
Please read the book and try low carb high fat for a month and come back and tell us how you feel. Look out for better skin, better sleep and less aches in your joints. It's a side-effect of lowering carbs.

boilerhouse2007 · 19/05/2018 08:40

well i know that alot of females and fat loss ppl take adhd medications and the likes, i have had them before and they work a treat- kill appetite dead and give permanent energy as they are very strong stimulants. The downside though is you cannot sleep on them and it can drive you nuts in the end. Everything has a price as they say. I have also dieted heavily for months before and got into fitness model shape but again this will drive you crazy in the end.

Luisa27 · 19/05/2018 08:42

Yes. The main principle of the blood sugar diet is essentially very low carb. And a daily intake of 800 calories. There are hundreds of really simple, delicious recipes on the website and it works out LOTS cheaper than buying a load of junk food....as I say it’s more a healthy eating way of life, rather than diet

ragged · 19/05/2018 08:45

How does a person go from 3000 kcal binges to 800 kcal day? Confused?

BSD fans had better give OP a lot of tips how to do that (emotional tips).

boilerhouse2007 · 19/05/2018 08:46

''Yes. The main principle of the blood sugar diet is essentially very low carb. And a daily intake of 800 calories. There are hundreds of really simple, delicious recipes on the website and it works out LOTS cheaper than buying a load of junk food....as I say it’s more a healthy eating way of life, rather than diet''

meh i have tried every diet going and believe me this is very hard to substain, No healthy diet in the world can kill your primitive urges- sadly only drugs can do that.

ragged · 19/05/2018 08:49

How does the BSD stave off boredom & tiredness, which OP says are her triggers?

Something about the "recipes" always extolled on BSD I don't get.
So there are complicated recipes which for some people will give them time to feel they made an emotional connection to food that they want and need, I can see that working for some folk to be "enough" food.

But For me, having to spend so much time to smell & prepare the food & then get hardly any of it into my maw... neah. That's just torture, that is.

Roussette · 19/05/2018 08:49

I'm with you someset you have my sympathies. I lost 5-6 stone a number of years back, but a lot of it has crept back on, ounce by ounce, inch by inch.

Now, i have a knee injury and can't exercise as much as I want or walk as far as I want, until physio and time sorts out the problem. Depressing.

The only tip I would offer is do not buy the tempting snacks, do not have them in the house.

If I have people round for a drink or meal, I only buy the crisps I know we'll eat, if anything is left over I gorge them. I never buy chocolate, biscuits, ice cream, treats. I have no self control whatsoever. So if it's not in the house, I can't have it.

IjustbelieveinMe · 19/05/2018 08:50

I thirdly team RH.

My weight loss has been very very slow while signing up to Richie on facebook, but I understand it is the only way, whilst consistently walking 15000 steps every single day. I still drink red wine Blush and don't really track calories or enter my food into my fitness pal like I should, but through weighing myself every single day in pounds and only going by the weeks average weight, have I kept this up and 5 months down the line am now seeing results.

I work with people who crash dieted, have lost 10 kilos in 3 weeks but are now back to where they started from. So slowly slowly wins the race.