to not want my 7 year old to go on holiday for 3 weeks with my ex?

[somanymiles]

My ex has asked if we can split the summer holidays into 2 so that DS, aged 7, spends 3 weeks straight with each of us. Our court order says we split the holidays evenly, but in 1 and 2 week chunks. 2 weeks already seems a very long time to me! AIBU to say no? I feel my DS already finds the transition back to me hard, even when he has been with his Dad for a week (which he has done in previous holidays). The court order does say we can vary the arrangements by mutual agreement, but I just think DS is still too young for 3 weeks straight away from me. Am I just being clingy? He does spend 3 nights a week with his Dad and we have split previous school holidays equally, so he is used to being with his Dad.

I think it does sound like it is you being too clingy , and nobody can blame you for that , however on the face of it it looks like a very sensible option . It sounds like you co parent very well which is great for your ds .

I think it sounds better for DS, but understandably difficult for you.

Will DS be local, so that if there was a problem he could come back to you easily? Maybe something to think about, but best not to put the idea in his head that that is even an option.

How would your DS feel about it? It depends what sort of relationship he has with each of you really. My DS is 6 and sees his Dad lots each week (nearly every day) but would be really upset at not seeing me for 3 weeks. Equally, I wouldn't ask his Dad to not see him for 3 weeks.

Is there a good reason for it? eg his Dad taking him on a long amazing holiday to Australia? How has DS dealt with 2 week periods in the past?

Ds did 3 weeks from the age of 4. It will be harder for you but easier for him because he can settle in better.

I think people are being too harsh with you Op. Maybe they haven't experienced similar I don't know.

I think it depends on your son and his relationship with his Dad. Is he happy when he's with his Dad? Do they have a good relationship? If so then this sounds fine.

But I understand your feelings!

YABU

YABVU and clingy......

I think it depends on the child but I think 3 weeks is a long time to be separated from either parent, even when he has the other parent there.

YABU