To be angry/upset at my DF

[stripesandspots10]

On friday i went to the doctors to get Anti depressants as i just couldnt cope anymore. I usually put on an act that everything is fine. I finally told DM that it werent and that i was really struggling. She was supportive and great. Anyway i have not seen my DF since thursday and saw him today when i popped round theirs. He obviously knows about my situation as my DM tells him everything and obviously i dont mind him knowing as he is my DF.

So i get round there, he said hi. Had a general chat about their night out they had. Then he said im now going to watch the last football game of the season and cleared off to the living room. Didnt see him the rest of the time i was there. AIBU to be upset with him not to even make an effort to speak to me. To not ask if im ok. If it was the other way around i'd be concerned and checked everything was ok. I feel angry at him. This is not the first time i've felt angry at him for not bothering with me and going to sit and watch sports.

You don't actually know that your DM told him anything, you're just assuming so, correct?

Lots of people assume that treatment for mental health issues is a sensitive topic and would wait for the person to bring it up themselves, assuming that he did know.

YABU. He did chat to you. Then he wanted to watch the football. You could have said to him that you'd like to talk about it, or ask him if he had any questions or you could simply reassured him and said something like "Dad I guess you know I've just started ADs, I'm having a bit of tough time at the moment...."

You said yourself you usually put on a front - he's not a mindreader. And as for him 'not bothering with you and watching sports....' you obviously have deeper issues and a neediness about what you consider to be a lack of attention.

Well done on seeking help btw - I hope the ADs help you and feel stronger soon.

YABU. He did talk to you, he didn't ignore you. He just didn't talk to you about the issues you have been having but maybe he was waiting for you to open up first because he doesn't want to offend you. There's plenty of reasons.

Well done on getting some help and not putting a brave face on it but your DF is not a mind reader. If you want to talk to him about something then that's on you not him.

Maybe your DM didn't tell him. She might think your DF is the type who thinks people who take antidepressants, should "Just pull themselves together" and telling him would make him think of you as one of those people. Maybe she did tell him, and that's exactly the reaction she anticipated.