Is this rude behaviour from a colleague?

[Neversayever]

We work in an open plan office and I’d say once a week a woman (works in same floor) bakes something.

She brings it over to our department but will only offer what she’s baked to certain people.

How often do you bake and offer food round to other departments?

I wouldn't think it's unusual to bake and offer leftovers to friends in other departments... Surely they can't make enough for everyone

It's cost whoever has made it time and money and why would they have to share it with absolutely Everyone? It's like someone expecting a lift off someone that drives because they offered a lift to someone else but not asked you. Stop being entitled. It would be different if the boss had bought it as a reward for the whole team and then only shared it out with certain team members.

It would never in a million years occur to me to be annoyed with a woman I don’t know offering her cake to her friends.

Have you ever baked for everyone OP?

Her cake, her rules :P you need to bake more and offer to share to heal the office devide

No, I don't find this rude unless she was offering it to everyone in the department bar one or two.

I don't bake but sometimes buy a bag of doughnuts if I fancy just the 1.

I have one then offer one to my immediate team then those that sit nearest to me . People in my wider team then get offended that they haven't been offered one but so what .

I'm not going to spend my own money and buy 2 bags just so there's enough to go round.
It's not selfish it's my money.

It's childish for them to feel left out and jealous and if they want one they can go and buy one themselves.

I think that's rude. I quite often bake for my office and I make sure there's enough for everyone and leave it in the kitchen area for people to help themselves.

I don't think it's rude.
There are over 100 in my office, I can't bake enough for all of them! I generally waited till team meetings then baked for the team and anything left sent out an office wide email telling people to help themselves.
Maybe she can't afford to bake for everyone, or maybe she just doesn't want to. Either way it's her choice really

Shes not responsible for feeding the whole department. Buy your own cake, why should she subsidise you?

Yes she is being rude and obviously making a point.

Instead of parading around the office with her cakes she should just discreetly message the 'chosen ones' to let them know to come and help themselves on their break.

^This

Perhaps there’s not enough for everyone, so she’s giving them to her friends.

But I agree it would be politer to message the chosen people and invite them to pop over to her desk to collect a cake.

rude is in the eye of the beholder.
my life has been much calmer since I accepted this.

Or she may just not be great at all the office politics.

I work with a lady who has Aspergers. Early fifties, very kind but her thought process would be “I’ll make a cake. I’ll offer a bit to person x.” And so on until she gets to the people she is less at ease with. Then she’ll retreat to her desk. No intention to offend, just less sure of herself.
And definitely not a power play or cliquiness or spite, just social clumsiness.

I sometimes take in home baked things for myself and my direct colleague, and she does the same for me. We are in open plan but why would I want to bake for 20 people...? A colleague close by often makes comments about it which I think is rude! (She never brings in anything for me btw).

It would never in a million years occur to me to be annoyed with a woman I don’t know offering her cake to her friends.

Except when it's happening within the workplace 'friends' shouldn't come into it.

Everyone within the workplace are colleagues first and foremost.

Treating people differently and excluding others is incredibly unprofessional.

Falling it is isn't it! That's the nail on the head, right there.

It's rude and she sounds like a lick arse.

All you can do is smirk at that kind of childish behaviour.

Go to her department and offer everyone a donut 🍩. Except her.

Treating people differently and excluding others is incredibly unprofessional.

Do you go to lunch with your entire department then Falling?
Send an individual Christmas Card to the entire department?

No of course not.

Being one of several people not offered a scone is hardly exclusionary behaviour and I would find it very difficult to take anyone seriously if they suggested it was.

This woman isn’t giving to everyone except the OP, she’s just offering to her friends.

Why should she have to make enough for 100 people rather than a dozen?

I’m still interested to hear how often the OP bakes and if she makes for the entire floor?

@TheDairyQueen 😂😂😂 that’s hilarious - please do that OP

I think it depends what colleagues she is offering it to.

If she's cherry picking people she's friends with, this would be better done at a break time.

If she's offering to her immediate team(s) (and all of her immediate team) and you're not in that team, I think fair enough.

I'd be bloody delighted. I can't eat food that others whom I don't really know well have made in their own kitchens. I just find it unclean and couldn't stomach it. I hate having to take a piece of cake or a cookie or whatever from someone's tupperware box fully in the know that I will dispose of it the second no-one is looking.

Is this a recent thing, baking for people in the office.

In all the different kinds of offices I worked in, when I worked, been retired about six years now, nobody, but nobody baked cakes and brought them in.

People would buy cakes on their birthdays, but baking, never happened.

It’s bloody expensive to bake for a lot of people. It’s also difficult when there are people you want to treat and others you may not. Every office has someone who’ll eat anything but never bring anything in. Therefore I don’t bother unless birthdays/ holidays and bring sweets which are easier to share

I bet there is a lot of research carried out by a few here before visiting a restaurant.