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Original poster

Child has has broken my fence!!

80 replies

Snappymcsnappy · 08/05/2018 16:32

I am absolutely furious!

Fed up with people young and old trampling the flowers at the very front of my garden, I used what little money I have to buy a cheap plastic fence to stop it.

Me and DH thrilled with how lovely it looks, I stand at my kitchen today to see a boy about the same age as my eldest forcefully kicking my fence Angry Angry

I am pretty sure I have seen this child and his friends and their mums before, stomping on my plants, running into people's gardens and generally being a nuisance.

Second I opened the door to confront the little shit child he runs down the street to mummy, on realising that I've followed him and am going to confront him much cuddling up to mummy, hiding behind her.

Mum was very apologetic, I set about trying to fix my fence.
Cannot. It's bent beyond repair.

Then she starts telling me how it couldn't have been her child because he never lies to her and was walking with her, must have been her friends child...

No apology from other mother of course assuming this is true.
In fact, when I explained that it was a cheap fence that won't take kicking and I don't want my property damaged she looked to be stifling a laugh.
No chastising naughty child of course either.
Don't want to damage their spirit and all that shit I imagine.

I am so annoyed, but really really upset as well.

The garden used to be hedge, nettle and bramble.
Me and DH worked hard for years to get it pretty with very very limited money.

I don't have the money to be constantly replacing broken fence, even if it is super cheap.
Any little bit of spare cash I have I spend on trying to make my garden pretty.

When did people get so fucking disrespectful?!

Never, as a child would I have damaged someone's things because I knew it was wrong and that I would get a bollocking.
Ditto for my children, I would have firstly died of embarrassment had they done something like that, then offered to pay for a new portion and come down VERY hard on my children.

Not sure where to go from here.
They pass my house everyday and I suspect it will happen again.
I can't afford a more sturdy fence, nor can I afford to keep replacing a few panels regularly.
I could put in a insanely prickly blood drawing hedge but money again and I hate hedges and it's already shady so nothing will grow!

OP posts:
Sweatymoose · 08/05/2018 16:47

Get a fake but very obvious CCTV set up pointing into the garden?

What a little brat.

Original poster
Snappymcsnappy · 08/05/2018 16:51

I actually do!!

I even pointed the cameras out to the mum and who said she wanted to see the footage.
Unfortunately
A) only my DH knows how to operate them, freeze, play back etc.
And B) I don't actually want to taking strangers around my house (CCTV in the bedroom)

OP posts:
DamsonOnThisDress · 08/05/2018 16:51

If they damage your stuff again report to the police. Some might say ott for kids mucking about but if their parents refuse to accept responsibility or teach them any respect then what else can you do? Put up with it? Nah.

I had an absolute gut full of this sort of thing in our first house. A particular bunch of kids mindlessly wrecked everything - fences, car paintwork and wing mirrors, people's gardens... Just blatant destructiveness.

They didn't give a shit because when their parents were approached they wouldn't have any of it and would lie that their child was home the entire day despite there being many witnesses and often in cases the child had already admitted it.

The kids didn't annoy me so much but the parents attitude really pissed me off. You couldn't reason with them. In the end we put the house on the market because it was incessant and the parents couldn't not have given one tiny shit.

Even an apology would have made a difference but they were so scared of having to put their hand in their pocket that they lied to protect their little angel and you got a door in the face.

I feel for you. Really pees me off. I hope that's the end of it for you and they don't plague you.

OreoMini · 08/05/2018 16:52

*she starts telling me how it couldn't have been her child because he never lies to her and was walking with her, must have been her friends child...

No apology from other mother of course assuming this is true*

Did you see which child it was or not? If you know which one did it why don’t you ask her to replace the panel?

DSHathawayGivesMeFannyGallops · 08/05/2018 16:53

Fake or real cctv- would curb the "not my child" issue. If the issue is mostly young'uns, would one of those devices that emits high frequency noise work? Appreciate that neither solution is cheap though.
My only other suggestion would be fencing so rough and nasty that it would be splinter prone and be a painful deterrent.

Original poster
Snappymcsnappy · 08/05/2018 16:58

OreoMini
I am 99.9% sure the child cuddling up to mummy is the guilty party.
Both boys were in the same uniform, same sort of height and same skin and hair colour so very similar and it is possible it was the other one as the mother says but I followed offending child back to mummy and friends and I'm quite sure it was him I saw cuddling up and hiding.

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 08/05/2018 16:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BrightYellowDaffodil · 08/05/2018 17:04

I don't know how expensive they are, but are landmines an option for the affected area?

WomaninGreen · 08/05/2018 17:06

OP if you see them again take a picture.

RatherBeRiding · 08/05/2018 17:06

Personally I'd save up for the insanely prickly hedge, shade or not. In the meantime if you have CCTV - use it! If any other mother asks to see the footage tell them to contact the local police, as that is where it is being forwarded.

Juells · 08/05/2018 17:06

If you know the time the children are out I'd have sprinklers pointed at the fence so the spray discourages them. Steady stream, though, if it's intermittent it will become a game.

CalF123 · 08/05/2018 17:10

Shows you what schools are up against these days when you have such disrespectful little shits with parents who back up their kids all the way.

BlueJava · 08/05/2018 17:12

I totally understand why you're upset, but please take a minute to think it through. Don't do anything that will escalate things. I agree the kid is not right to break things - especially your stuff that you've saved for and worked hard on. However, this type of family won't back off - they will escalate. You may well be better to fix up what you can and leave it. They are clearly ignorant.

Mosaic123 · 08/05/2018 17:14

Any chance of making something like this OP? Your friends and family may donate bottles if you ask.

www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/421790321342842401/

BarbarianMum · 08/05/2018 17:14

Do you know where they live? If so tell them to pay up within 24 hours or you'll report to the police. Then do it.

Fruitcorner123 · 08/05/2018 17:16

Watch the cctv tonight with your husband to confirm which boy it was. Can your husband transfer the footage to a computer? if he can you should be able to get access on your phone so you can go out and show her. Then tomorrow as they walk past do what RatherBeRiding says and ask her to take responsibility. If she won't say you will be forwarding the footage to the police.

Cherrypieface123 · 08/05/2018 17:16

I’d take the CCTV to their school if you can identify it from their uniform.

youarenotkiddingme · 08/05/2018 17:17

When me and neighbours had this we did a 'patrol' on a rota. Basically one of us say out the front on a garden chair with a cuppa daily as they walked home from school.
Then we started retreating but appearing randomly some days and some days appearing out if the house.

It did stop as they didn't know when and where we'd appear - and we use to enjoy swapping stories of how at the beginning we heard them whispering to each other out of eye shot whether to risk it or not!

LadyFlumpalot · 08/05/2018 17:18

My mum had a big old wooden fence at the front of her garden, next to the pavement. It kept getting kicked and smashed on Friday/Saturday nights. So, one time as she was getting it fixed she had a rough and ready brick wall built right behind it.

She tells me the yell of pain at 2:30am the next Saturday morning was well worth the cost Smile

Could you do something similar? Pile a rockery made out of garden rubble or similar behind the fence when you can it fixed?

DGRossetti · 08/05/2018 17:20

And what parent let’s a child “play”with a disability aid, right in front of their eyes?

The sort that lets their 3/4 year old scoot around in Sainsburys on a 3 wheeled scooter, and suggest to DW that she should "best keep out of his way" with her wheelchair ?

Just a guess.

Soubriquet · 08/05/2018 17:22

I would stand watch around school times and snap a photo if you can.

If the mum still refuses to accept liability I would actually threaten with the police.

They might not do anything but they would have a word at least

Chattymummyhere · 08/05/2018 17:22

Grow some blackberry’s or raspberry’s. Edible and will give them a rough ride. Ask at your local allotments lots will have some to get rid off. In fact if your local we have some rose bushes that grow lovely from clipping very sharp thorns.

BarbarianMum · 08/05/2018 17:24

The police will act if you have CCTV. It's just trying to get them to do anything without it that's difficult.

Aprilmightbemynewname · 08/05/2018 17:26

At my previous address when lbdc (little bastard dear child) kept kicking, and trying to smash my fence I kept my hose handy, started cleaning my yard and watering my pots. And wet the little fucker.
Always shouted oops sorry. And told his dm he shouldn't have been hanging around my property trying to vandalise it.
Sprinklers maybe op??

tillytoodles1 · 08/05/2018 17:30

I was walking with a stick after an operation, when a kid about six whizzed past me, riding a supermarket trolley. I got such a shock, I yelled at him. He was with his grandparents, who said nothing. It's not just the parents who let kids get away with bad behaviour.

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