to HATE my boobs?

[SunnyMami]

15 weeks pregnant. So incredibly happy as I've had numerous miscarriages and operations on my cervix for other problems. Baby is so wanted, but my new boobs really aren't.

My problem? My left boob is growing at a significantly faster rate than my right one. It is now more than a cup size bigger then the right and looks bizarre. I know I should just accept this new look, as in the end they're only changing to cater for baby, but I feel so down about it.

AIBU to feel like this? Is it normal to react so badly to my changing body? Scared I will now forever be left with lopsided boobs...

I know I shouldn't be but I'm also worried about what DP will think. He's never given me reason to feel unattractive but he does love my boobs and I'm so uncomfortable being naked in front of him now because they look so strange. Do I just need to get over this? I don't know why it's so hard to accept.

They will go back to normal after your milk dries up. It's incredibly common amongst pregnant and BF mums as you'll no doubt find out as you make mum friends. Your body will change in lots of ways that seem scary and perhaps ugly at first, but you will get used to them and learn to love the new you, and your DH will love your body for what it's doing/done.

Don't worry, you're only 15 weeks. Mine did the same but they did even out quickly!

Thanks @user1495490253 - I'm finding it so hard to get used to. I just wondered if other people found it difficult to accept or if I was on my own here!

would you suddenly find your DH unattractive if he had a swollen ball? Or maybe had to have one removed for some reason?

Give your DH more credit...and also give yourself more credit. You are so VERY much more than an even pair of boobs....

@Morphene you're right but I still like to feel attractive. I look forward to my growing belly. I guess I'm just feeling incredibly self conscious...

It's normal but a shock at first. Many women find they produce more milk on one side too (I did) so you get used to them being lopsided. They go back to normal after you stop breastfeeding.

Have your maternity bras got pockets for breast pads? I just added an extra foam cup on one side to even it out, and avoided tops without patterns!

@OneStepSideways I don't have a maternity bra yet as I have no idea what I'm doing!

He likely wouldn't even notice and even if he did, it's hardly like you have been become hugely disfigured (although I totally understand why you are feeling the way you are, but we tend to be far more critical of ourselves than others are).

@DickTERFin absolutely! I just can't get my head around how different I look. Definitely not the images we see in baby magazines!

fwiw I don't think its unusual to feel self-conscious when you have a sudden change in body shape etc.

But I do think you shouldn't give into the sensation...aim to celebrate that your body is changing!

If its any help I think its quite common for the process of pregnancy and childbirth to leave you feeling less self-conscious about your body than you have been historically.

For example after giving birth I found I suddenly didn't worry about communal changing spaces anymore....it was like I'd seen my body for what it was...not a decorative ornament, but a functional machine capable of extraordinary things....and I found I just couldn't be ashamed of it anymore.

7 years on I still have a much healthier attitude to my body and nudity etc. It has an ever increasing list of aesthetic 'flaws' but it its keeping me alive...which is far more important!