"big" birthday meal arrangements....

[PyongyangKipperbang]

Indian restaurant that does incredible food and sells soft drinks but if you want alcohol you take it with you.

What should the arrangements be for a X0th with 12 people, with regards to providing/ paying for drinks. Host is paying the full cost of the meal (3 courses plus coffee).

Its been suggested that guests bring/buy their own drinks. Its simpler and everyone can bring their preferred drink.

I think its fine but the host (not me btw) is worried in case anyone choosing not to drink gets the hump that they have to pay bar prices when drinkers dont have to. Personally I would be happy with the arrangement if I was getting a lovely meal paid for!

I think she should do it this way, AIBU?

the host (not me btw) is worried in case anyone choosing not to drink alcohol gets the hump

Could you sneak in some Schloer?

YANBU - the restaurant doesn't provide alcohol so people wanting to drink should bring their own.

Its all going to work out the same really I would imagine. Soft drinks can't be that expensive compared to a nice bottle of wine.

If she's really worried then perhaps get people to RSVP with their choice of Red/ White wine and she could then buy some bottles for the table. If anyone wants something else then they can bring their own.

Like you said, I too would be happy if I was getting a nice meal paid for.

Sounds fine to me.

A few hugs of orange juice on the table perhaps.

Absolutely fine. People bringing wine aren't getting it for free, they're buying it in advance is all. Honestly, if someone manages to take the hump about buying a glass or two of Fanta when their 3 course meal is being paid for then they're probably the type of person who'll always find something to moan about.

Presumably if you’re tight you can get tap water for free? I think that’s fine.

I think that sounds fine. I think if anyone is choosing not to drink and is truly worried about cost, they can always just drink water. I would much prefer that to the alternative which is non-drinkers getting stuck splitting the bill when they end up paying for everyone else’s drinks. When I was pregnant, we went for a Christmas meal and I ended up sharing the cost of about 10 bottles of wine even though all I had was a coke. Though if she’s paying for everyone’s meal, it probably won’t make much difference to pay for a lemonade or two and that might just be easier.

We just ask for a jug of tap water or drink pints of black currant and soda which is lush and very cheap.

I think it would be a bit of a cheek to moan about having to buy a drink when your host has paid for everything else!

Honestly I think it’d be a faff to get people to pay for their own soft drinks if you are paying for everything else, if it’s only going to be an extra couple of ££ per person I’d just pay for it along with the meal. Rather than people having to pass £2.50 or whatever their Sprite cost up the table.

I think I’d cover all soft drinks, let the drinkers bring their own alcoholic beverages and perhaps bring 2 bottles of prosecco with you, for a toast.

Hmm..... good point about it being a bit of a faff, so I will suggest she asks for a couple of jugs of water/squash on the table. But over all the consensus seems to be that it would be an ok thing for her to cover the food and guests to sort their own drinks, so thank you for that.

I am taking a couple of magnums of prosecco as a surprise :)

My sister switched the contents of a bottle of white with Schloer. Looked a bit dodgy when she left the venue having drunk the whole bottle and got into her car to drive home. It was also not great when her daughter poured herself a drink from what she thought was Schloer from the fridge the next morning and took a big mouthful.